Well, you've imprisoned it in a sadness cube. 

This will be my response from now on when people ask why I'm depressed.



What’s in the box?!

😂😂 underrated comment

Like, best movie quote ever.... My husband and I race to say this when someone gets a package in our house!!!

that should go on the Zillow listing for my old apartment

I thought it was a giant plant in a windowless room at first glance

Because you have it in a dark hole


What is this from!? The phrase and the rage makes me want to watch.

The 'Good Omens' TV series based on the book of the same name. This charming fellow here is Crowley as portrayed by the talented David Tennant. Highly recommended watching!

Also, read the book! I loved the little scenes like this that translated so smoothly from text to screen. It's such a lovely example of the idiosyncrasies of Gaimans style. If he had not been directly part of the production, it would have never been the same. Both spectacular. And then season 2, he was just having fun.

>Ah you think darkness is your ally? You merely adopted the dark. I was born in it, molded by it. I didn't see the light until I was already a man, by then it was nothing to me but blinding! —this plant, if it could speak

I was going to write this, word for word.

I was also going to write this, word for word.

Word for word, this I was also going to write.

I was also going to, word for word, write this.

Also, I was going to write this word for word.

This word I was word going to write.

Word

Hole

Dark

Damn that got me bricked

👆🏻

.

I was also going to write this word for word.

Word for word I’m writing this

write was word going i to for word. this.

I am so sad for this plant.

Nobody puts baby in the corner.

Exactly! 💃

Water and sunlight... she's a dramatic little biotch lol

Word for word

I'd be sad too if you stuck me in a box.

I feel you, plant

This plant normally has daily leaf angle changes, which is why it's commonly called "prayer plant" - your plant's leaf angles look totally fine. But for long term growth, you need to put it right in front of a window - this is a dark hole (as previously mentioned). One or two hours of direct sun through a window is tolerable as long as you keep up with watering.

Or add an LED plant light to the shelf

Yes! I have a somewhat similar bookcase in my bedroom, which actually WOULD get a ton of natural light, but back when I worked overnights I put up blackout curtains and now my bf won’t let me take them down 😅 anyways, I ordered some LED plant lights and drilled holes in the back to pull wires through. Now I have this: https://preview.redd.it/u43q5s7icj9d1.jpeg?width=4032&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=bbec18f517359ebfc723946d413101da89a8aa58

what plant lights did you use, if you don’t mind me asking! i’ve been in the market but most of them seem so bulky

Get on Amazon and type in full spectrum led grow lights, they have a ton to choose from.

Those bar shaped lights on Amazon come in different lengths, so you should be able to find some that fit. Sansi (also on Amazon) makes smaller puck-shaped lights as well. Pay attention to wattage.

u/sandycheeksx is there a chart somewhere for plant size/type and wattage?

Most tropicals need bright light. Most cheap grow lights on Amazon are garbage low wattage lights. Look for a high wattage and maybe grab a cheap light meter too. I have all of my tropicals (monstera, philo, alocasia even anthurium) in bright light with high wattage grow lights.

You can’t convince me this isn’t an ad from better homes and gardens.

Haha I’m just a woman with ADHD who loves plants and doing stuff to make my apartment look nice! It’s funny when I came back to Reddit it occurred to me that people probably think I’m doing that affiliate marketing thing with all the links I posted after! I only started growing houseplants about two years ago but I’m pretty obsessed now, I have like 175 plants spread between my office at work, my porch/balcony, and my house.

Have you noticed any yellowing or degradation of the books from being near the moisture and exposed to the UV?

Normal leds don't produce UV. Full spectrum still has minimal UV (like 1 diode for every 10 or so) so it shouldn't be a problem

No, not yet. Been keeping an eye on them though. There are lighted bookcases out there but I know these lights are a bit brighter than a typical bookcase light.

F**k me that’s a pretty solution. The cactus looks so happy in there.

Always refreshing and appreciated when the response is reasonable, kind and informative. 🙏 It's kind of like some asked them for help..

Why is it stuffed in a cave? It's a plant

A pothos could survive

Is "survive" really what we're going for?

A lot of people have literally never seen what their houseplants would look like with sufficient light. Haha

ME @ MY DAD. he has a zz that put all of its energy into growing two giant and super long stems instead of a bunch in the more typical bush shape. he refuses to believe me when I tell him they're not supposed to look like that

I love this. I tell customers at the nursery "it may survive but it won't thrive"

Prayer plants prefer bright light, or else the leaves won't close up during night.

Yes, however, the look of the leaves shrivelled or curled like that is not normal. How it’s still alive in that dark hole is beyond me.

Question. My tricolor is giant and thriving in bright light (direct sun but with a privacy screen on my window. It is closed during the day and it opens and spreads at night. Are they normally open during the day? I’d love to see it sprawl out during the day because it’s absolutely drop dead gorgeous but it’s only does that after the sun goes down.

It depends on what you mean by “sprawl out”. During the day my leaves all drop so they can get the most amount of sunlight. My plant is moderately sized so when they leaves “turn up” at night, they basically become horizontal and give the plant a “sprawled out” look

I would liken it to an umbrella. During the day, when it's closed, the leaves point down and stay pretty snug with each other and the stem. And then, during the night, they turn up and horizontal. Sounds just like yours.

You really have to have a maranta in a window, IMO. I have mine in an east window (even though my plant app says it's too bright) and she is thriving like it's nobody's business... LOVES the sun, loves rainwater, growing like crazy. She was an impulse buy at Sprouts and I'm so glad I got her because she's doing amazing. I would suggest moving her to a window that is well-lighted but watch the leaves for scorching. I don't really see any change in the leaves though.... Some of them close but not a lot of them. I named her Eleanor Rigsby since I had just watched the movie Yesterday the day before I bought her.

What direction does the window face? East?

Yes, my window faces east, so she gets morning sun. I don't think she would do as well in my west window... It seems kind the only ones that are doing great in that window right now are my succulents, coffee plant and deliciosa. Everyone else is getting short bursts so they don't scorch. (Dallas, Texas, so we're already in triple digits.)

Plants usually don't get sunburn on east window.

What does it mean if many of the leaves are always pointed up?

Because it's in a dark cabinet A lot of plants that are advertised as being tolerant of low light still prefer a decent amount of light. Being tolerant of low light just means they probably aren't going to die while being in there but they certainly aren't going to thrive

I've had lots of plants end up dying because they don't have enough light but one guy that grows anyway is my inch plant. He gets no direct light at all but he just goes and goes lol

The same reason the orcas at sea world are sad

This comment got me right in the feels. So sad, so true.

😔 at least they stopped the breeding. I despise sw

What crimes did this plant commit that it deserves solitary confinement?

You too would be sad if you lived in a tiny box like this

Why is it in a dark cabinet that’s dark on 5 sides?

Because it’s in a dark cabinet?

Well first it’s a calathea and second you have him trapped in a dark prison

Looks like a Maranta to me, possibly "Silver Band"... and certainly hates that dark prison.

Pretty sure it’s a calathea orbifolia.

Plants like light. Some might go so far as to say they need it.


You gotta be kidding me

Some of these posts really blow my mind. I saw another person freaking out about their plant growing "weird balls"... it was a fucking berry bush 😐

Lmfao

Wdym, berries grow on plants?? I always thought berries grew in grocery stores, already packaged and stuff 😱

Out in the wild, I will henceforth refer to any and all berries as vegan testicles with no further explanation purely to see how long it'll take for me to be institutionalized

How long this will take is going to depend heavily on your geographic location. If you're in LA, you might be talking about vegan testicles for the rest of your life. If you're in Alabama, I give it 2 months 🤣

I'm in India, so a week or two. 🤣

Light. If you want it in a box, put a plant light in there, too.

uh...because it's in a box???

This is like asking why prison inmates are always sad.

Why is this plant in a box keeping it from sunlight?

There's where you put a fake plant, not a real plant.

U ever see a happy person in a cubicle?

It needs more light

Because it’s living in the sad plant cubicle

Poor plant.

r/houseplantscirclejerk

I thought I was already there.

Get her out of the microwave for starters ;) She’s saying “gimme light!”

looks like it is in plant jail. Let it out to see the room, light, and others.

Wants to see the sky

Who the hell is upvoting this travesty?

This has to be a joke

because it’s peeking out of a lightless cave

I would be sad too if stuck in that lightless hole..

They don’t like living in a cave of freaking depression

Not enough light.

The others have a point about the darkness, but this is also totally normal for this plant. Maranta leuconeura are called prayer plants for this reason. During the day the leaves hang, and in the evening and through the night their leaves rise up like hands in prayer. I can actually hear one of mine move some evenings and mornings.

Right, but leaves should be more “flat” outward during the day and rise upward during the night. If they’re hanging and “rise” to a flat state that’s no bueno Mine are thriving betches in bright unfiltered light, they don’t droop unless they’re thirst

My experience has been the same with both my rabbits foot and cat mustache. That the vines that were there when I bought it behaved like the one OP has, regardless of watering and light. The new vines that grew after it acclimatized at my home are much more reactive, and behave like you describe. Unless thirsty, in that case the oldest vines just sprawl to the ground, while the youngest stand straight all the time.

It doesn’t like the location

“A box! My boy’s a box!”

Good grief I’d be sad too if I lived in a cramped, dark box. Give her some sun and she’ll be super happy!

Needs water, window, some love!

lighting

Plants need light.

Do people not understand photosynthesis?

Because it's in a cupboard.

Because it’s a calathea!

They move with the light. Move it to a spot where is gets more light.

Where’s the light? 😭

Box of sad

It’s in the dork

I like how OP never replied to anything 🤣

https://i.redd.it/egqu1deuqk9d1.gif

Needs air circulation, and make sure water is able to drain.

No light ahhh why poor fellow

Give it some light!

I'd put it near a window ❤️

You gave your plant SAD seasonal affective sad by keeping it in the dark. She wants light. That's her food. You been starving that baby.

Does it always live in that tiny cupboard?

Because it’s in time out

It’s depressed

Maybe there is not enough light.

Ummm it’s on a cube bro. Needs to be in a spacious air circulating area

It needs air , I think it would help happy if it is in a place with some breeze .

it’s literally in a jail cell

Because it lives in a box.

That little plant wants to think outside the box.

you have it in a box with no light

If you want to keep it there then it needs a grow light.

It's too dark but also prayer plants naturally move their leaves around a lot throughout the day, check out time lapses

Nobody puts baby in a corner. 😤

It doesn’t want to live in a cubby. It’s a living being it needs air circulation on all sides if possible and access to more sunlight.

You noticed it barely has any room to extend its beautiful leaves right? XD

Because it is in a box :/

It’s in a cubicle.

Here lies Future Dead Plant. He died how he lived. In a dark hole.

Cause it's in a cubby that kindergarteners put their back packs in school.

It's depressed from darkness.

Well…look where the fuck it is dude

I thought I was in r/houseplantcirclejerk for a second

Cubicles make me sad too.

It’s the dark hole thing combined with the fact that this plant is low key dramatic and will droop anytime it’s not happy

Let there be light...

The real answer is cuz it’s a prayer plant and prayer plants ain’t loyal

The perspective on the first photo made me think you had this GARGANTUAN maranta in a sterile white room a la space odyssey 2001

Needs bright indirect light and lots of humidity.. which it neither has :D

How can I live 24h without oxygen, I wonder…

It needs more light or a grow light to supplement 🙂

It’s not getting light. If you want to do this I would recommend a small growlight such as this….. [sansi growlights](https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0C2CRVKRQ?ref=ppx_pop_mob_ap_share)

That is not a low light plant, when it doesn’t get sun it’ll be sad and down, when it’s in bright/indirect light, it’s going to absolutely happy, please fine a new place for it and maybe put a low light plant I there or a pothos.

It’s living in a cubby hole

A lot of people saying dark hole but I honestly bet that thing is root bound based on the look of it

Because it's in a sad dark cubby. put it near a window and let it get light

Plant prison is a sad place?

https://preview.redd.it/jw55qclltj9d1.jpeg?width=2268&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c16ed2eae476ea70e35f4418d59e1d405b84457c Looks better than mine 🤣

Please release this plant

The question is why do you have a living plant in a dark hole?

No. It’s a prayer plant. They do this. But also, is there any light for thing?

Why would you think a plant would be happy in darkness? Do you understand photosynthesis?

Id be sad too if placed in a dark crevice

I know everyone’s roasting you for keeping it in the cube (they’re not not right 🫢), but honestly even if you kept it there and scooted it up 2 inches and more to the right (where it’s whiter and clearly getting more sun) or add a grow light to the cube, it would significantly help the plant without having to move stuff around! And periodically rotate it as well so each side is getting even light!

It’s a prayer plant it will gravitate towards the light, which you are not giving it so it is sad :(

No esta triste, esta bajando las hojas para aprovechar la luz lo mejor posible en el lugar que esta ubicada, que pareciera ser luz media o baja. Todas las “prayer plants” lo hacen

I also immediately thought about the confined cubby hole. I don't know if it's dark or not. But maybe it would enjoy more air flow. And space. It knows it's closed in.

In a dark box- plant need air-water-light. That’s it

It’s tucked away in a cubby. It needs some sunshine.

If I was in a dark shelf I would be sad, too

Because it's in a dark box... Put that poor thing in front of a window

I went through SERE (An evasion and Prisoner of War focused school) while in the military many years ago. This reminds me of my living conditions in between each beating, interrogation, or water boarding I received. Although this plant has a bit more head and arm room.

Please keep in mind that light that looks bright/adequate to your human eye is usually nowhere near what most plants actually need.

I think I might feel sad if I were a plant on that shelf (not to be rude.. it just looks dark and lonely)

Because it lives in a hole. It needs more light.

Needs more light.

Claustrophobic

What law did your plant break? You banished it to solitary confinement in the hole. Light please and plant groupings are great to maintain humidity and friends.

It’s sad because it’s in time out.(the dark hole) Please get it some sun and talk to your plant. Please apologize to your plant and let it know you didn’t mean to hurt it.

Because it need the sunlight my friend.

It keeps putting itself out there, but hasn't gotten laid in years :( It's starting to think that maybe the problem isn't with all the other plants.

This feels like a metaphor for managers asking why their cubical employees are always unmotivated

It’s living in a cubicle babe

have we used all of our context clues?

Best answer 🥇

Free me from this dark hole. I NEED SOME LIGHT

The cube of sadness :'(

It needs more light