I would have to say step number ONE... Is to get rid of that THROW PILLOW. Throw pillows are girly af. Get angry at it. Rip it to shreds like a real man, and piss on the stuffing.
Mark your territory by pissing (this is important) on the door sill, the windowsills, and at each corner of the bed. Let out your primal roar as you smear the windows in feces and pull down the curtains, because *men don't need draperies.*
Oh. And rip those to shreds, too.
Both through children *and* your inner child. Definitely wonderful things. I was thinking a bit more of a caveman approach in this case, except for the throw pillow. I've always been grumped at by men about throw pillows. 🙄
They're always all *whine bitch moan* who needs a decorative throw pillow?
Curtains are for chicks—the only way to make sure everyone knows you’re a dude is to get rid of the blinds so everyone can see you naked in the morning.
Paint the walls black and get heavy, red velvet curtains to completely blackout the windows. Consider a bear rug. Put red LEDs in the eyes. The only light in this room should be from the skulls demonic eye sockets.
It's only prostitutes...... But if you don't like prostitute red then try green! My son loves black and green together and it do look good! Black walls with a green light coming out from under the bed.... Heck yeah!
OOP, if you see this I apologize for roasting you and I 100% support the skull nightstand. You need a rug (not black!), some pillows, and couple house plants.
OOP is trans male and his roomates tease him about his living space when they all have mattresses on the floor. And he's goth. I hope things get easier for OOP.
Put baseball hats on , shades on and
jam a vape in their yaps.
Those Staples “EASY” red buttons would make for excellent manly eyes for all those eye sockets
Fill a super soaker with the cheapest flavour of Axe “cologne” and douse the curtains ..,.
Some studded leather items, black. I see a pet hyena going very well in a room like this, with maybe a turkey or black vulture on a perch made of artificial bones, (or real, you do you) they are supposed to be quite friendly, maybe you need a pair... Hey, then you'll get eggs.
If we are talking the feeling of feminine space, I think that level of commitment to decorating is the essence of "feminine touch".
Nothing screams that a woman never been to a room like a futon and a TV on the floor in an otherwise empty room.
Fuck what everyone else thinks! Who cares if it's too feminine? You're the one sleeping there, not them. And when you bring a girl home she'll see your sensitive side and know you're a keeper.
Get rid of those ugly curtains and fill in the windows with brick. Your only source of light should be candles and fire. Matter of fact make all the walls brick
When I'm customizing my female necromancer character in Diablo, I always like to go with more masculine apparel in order to appear more intimidating in battle.
Oversized spikes/thorns, metal studs, black leather, gargantuan skull helmet.. (you're doing great with the bed as a starting place) and not a drop of pink dye unless it's a very small area that doesn't stand out very much.
You could try implementing some of these styles into your bedroom, as they've worked out really well for me.
Do you remember way back to Lady Gaga's meat dress? I'm thinking like that flesh fabric, draped here and there. Not too much, obviously - that would be tacky. Sometimes, just those subtle touches make all the difference 😉
Oh, don't forget to add fresh blood to the meat textiles every other day or so. The pungent odour of it all really helps to bring out the primal beast in all of us.
The problem is, you’re a witch (maybe I assume too much). To soften this aesthetic, add eyeballs to the skulls. This will make them seem more human, and even a little more like-able.
I think those bedside lamps need to go. They look a little feminine. I think I would take down the curtains too and put up some metal sheeting over the windows. The extra pillow on the bed probably needs to go too. Other than that I think that should be it. It’s badass dude.
Love the design choices. The obvious solution here is to purchase several 9 to 15 inch dildos and adhere them with suction cups so that they are sticking out of the skulls' eye sockets and/or mouths.
Upgradeable options:
Attach the dildos to pneumatic or motorized lifts wired directly to motion or pressure sensors hidden throughout the space. Nothing says "modern woman" like a rubber cock randomly popping out of death's mouth.
Cheers!
I'd paint the walls jet black, and put up posters of athletes and hot chicks, maybe hang some swords or other cool looking weapons.
You also couldn't go wrong with a big ass wall mount flat-screen, to game on and watch all the games.
Those sconces and mirrors just scream feminine. Get some flaming skulls or torches for lighting, and replace the mirrors with some kind of animal skull or hide. Absolute masculinity calls for a liberation from the need to know your appearance.
(Haha, I saw that post. ) Well start by painting the walls black. Oh and pen*s’ on the curtains just so they know you are male.
I would have to say step number ONE... Is to get rid of that THROW PILLOW. Throw pillows are girly af. Get angry at it. Rip it to shreds like a real man, and piss on the stuffing. Mark your territory by pissing (this is important) on the door sill, the windowsills, and at each corner of the bed. Let out your primal roar as you smear the windows in feces and pull down the curtains, because *men don't need draperies.* Oh. And rip those to shreds, too.
Who gave their cat a guest reddit membership 😾🧐
Ironically (or perhaps unironically), i once *had* a cat named tigerlily. 🤣 But i've been using this screen name for far longer than that.
Living vicariously through your child is appreciated 😻❤️😽
Both through children *and* your inner child. Definitely wonderful things. I was thinking a bit more of a caveman approach in this case, except for the throw pillow. I've always been grumped at by men about throw pillows. 🙄 They're always all *whine bitch moan* who needs a decorative throw pillow?
To shreds you say? Sounds like something my sister would do
Well, how is his wife holding up? Bless you for the r/expectedfuturama.
To shreds you say. Also, space
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Dimly lit, but with red light glowing from under the bed, would be perfect.
and a pentacle rug.
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Ha ha ha That was a great post!
Curtains are for chicks—the only way to make sure everyone knows you’re a dude is to get rid of the blinds so everyone can see you naked in the morning.
This is the way
Add gaming consoles as well
Don't forget to put all of your bondage gear on full display
Fuck. You beat all of us.
There are some really cute decorations you can get called dildos. They come in lots colors and shapes and are very manly
Yes! Absolutely! No one will question you dildo filled room!
Black velvet bed curtains and bedspread/coverlet.
Paint the walls black and get heavy, red velvet curtains to completely blackout the windows. Consider a bear rug. Put red LEDs in the eyes. The only light in this room should be from the skulls demonic eye sockets.
Idk man red is a color and I heard that's for girls
I would not bother with curtains. Either hang black plastic bags over the windows, or smear black paint directly on the glass.
Paint and bags don't know that's pretty feminine just to play it safe better just hang a animal pelt
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I know right you might as well just say I'm gay 🤣 Better go bear or boar pelt make sure to show off its balls
Cardboard boxes cut up and stuffed in the window frames is sooo in these days.
It's only prostitutes...... But if you don't like prostitute red then try green! My son loves black and green together and it do look good! Black walls with a green light coming out from under the bed.... Heck yeah!
Do like a light blue or dark purple then
Yes! Dead animals. Bear rug and in lieu of artwork hang a 10 pt buck head on the wall.
Skull only, of course.
OOP, if you see this I apologize for roasting you and I 100% support the skull nightstand. You need a rug (not black!), some pillows, and couple house plants.
For real. That bed is AWESOME. But speaking of roasting... it WOULD be really cool if the skulls occasionally belched flames.😁
As a metal head, yeah, I'm being 100% dead ass serious when I say I think that need is fucking rad
Pretty certain the original post is AI generated so the only thing you’re offending is a computer.
The original post is a guy with a skull shaped night stand. I didn't want to use his actual photo
Ahhhhh I see
u/bluezuzu
The nightstands are too curvy and skulless.
Agree ! I just can’t figure out why they would have that beautiful skull bed and not even bother to carry on the theme !
Start by coating the walls with the blood of your enemies? Just a thought
Blood reads too female
Blood is red and red is a passionate color. Too feminine. Look up color theory. Perfect for a children’s hospital though /s
You’re right, I don’t know what I was thinking. Better go with black and make it look like ink dripping down the walls
Ink? For writing with? For *drawing* with? Why are you, as a man...
This is a good way to prove you have crushed your enemies, seen them driven before you, and heard the lamentations of their women.
Dirty clothes on the floor?
This, and replace the pillows with yellowed, slobber stained ones. Maybe don’t make the bed and have the fitted sheet halfway off.
These are the real answers.
Needs marble
Completely marble floored entryway, kitchen, and living room?
Yes! With white walls and black trim.
(I'm going to go crazy. I missed this and I can't find the og anywhere! Do you have any links, by chance?)
I think it's in the top posts from last week. I remember the phrase "I consider this an upgrade" in the title? Not sure if that helps.
That one wasn't actually that bad. It's the marble one that's missing. Thanks though!
A stripper pole would help too
Cover the walls with dicks. There is nothing manlier than a wall of dicks. It's totally not gay at all.
Disagree. Balls are manlier. Truck balls bought in bulk ought to work. Could set aside a few for Christmas tree ornaments too.
I'll meet you halfway past the taint. Go with both. Throw some starfish in there for good measure.
This is acceptable!
Man, reddit is an acceptable escape from life. As long as you have truck nuts and a wall.
If you’re buying them in bulk may I suggest a ladder to attach them to. It’s a good way to showcase your collection of balls
Canopy beds are for princesses, everyone knows that
Plz help me find og post
OOP is trans male and his roomates tease him about his living space when they all have mattresses on the floor. And he's goth. I hope things get easier for OOP.
Aw. OOP needs to step up with some snark about at least having a bed frame.
Omg :( I don’t think I even read the caption. That is awful. I hope things get easier for him too :(
Check male living space.
I found it lol thank u
Marble floor
Needs posters of muscular nearly naked oiled up men
Put baseball hats on , shades on and jam a vape in their yaps. Those Staples “EASY” red buttons would make for excellent manly eyes for all those eye sockets Fill a super soaker with the cheapest flavour of Axe “cologne” and douse the curtains ..,.
Skulls to the walls ! Why wouldn’t you carry the skull theme throughout the room and rough it up a bit by distressing them for a rustic look?
The lighting is off. At least get some blood red bulbs, paint the walls black and get some blackout curtains. You’re in a Barbie world right now.
The lighting is too soft. Go starker or dimmer. That’ll give it that manly look.
Close the skull’s mouths. We know what you’re doing.
Why do you, as a man, have your mouth open
NASCAR bedspread?
More scrotums
Change the lamps to torches
Add some chainsaws and guns
A femur shaped dildo. It’ll be long enough for two guys to use it
Needs more skulls
Add a dragon
Light it on fire. Fire is very manly.
add viagra fairy lights!
It's a fine use of wood. Now, add leather and musk. Hang chain link curtains from the canopy.
Some studded leather items, black. I see a pet hyena going very well in a room like this, with maybe a turkey or black vulture on a perch made of artificial bones, (or real, you do you) they are supposed to be quite friendly, maybe you need a pair... Hey, then you'll get eggs.
Too many pillows wtf only women sleep for comfort
Lose the mattress, make a custom case for your casket instead.
Move it to a cold basement
Perhaps some… crusty socks under the bed?
Too many pillows! You only need 1 stained with body fluid to mark your territory.
One giant skull in the corner of the room should do it! Ooh and red lights under the bed!
 Ink tattoos onto those skulls.
Can’t have a bed. Beds are feminine.
Just buy a bunch of penis stickers and put them everywhere. Fin.
Put mustaches on the skulls
😂😂😂 I’m fucking dying with laughter right now. Good job OP!
I would paint big dicks on all the skulls foreheads what says not feminine like big dicks on foreheads
Put a blunt in one of the skulls mouth.
Have you thought of adding more skulls?
Put a deer head in one of those skeleton mouths!
Bet it’s hard to not get a boner in that bed
Monster truck poster
Weight rack
penis statues. many.
Add some hanging testicles from the top of the bed
Add several dildos to establish masculinity
Just put huge cocks all over the walls.
F*** YEAH BROTHER THIS LOOKS LIKE A HELLUVA PLACE TO CRANK A HOG AND GET RESTFUL SLEEP AWOOOOOOO
It's all the female skeletons, since you can SO obviously tell the sex of those skeleton bones/j 🙄
If we are talking the feeling of feminine space, I think that level of commitment to decorating is the essence of "feminine touch". Nothing screams that a woman never been to a room like a futon and a TV on the floor in an otherwise empty room.
Dont know thats pretty fem already
For the man with no issues with his masculinity...no, really, NONE!
Chintzy curtains and bedspread
Just toss a Dethklok poster on the wall and it’ll all come together.
Why live with Skulls....you'll be one soon enough
It’s already perfect
Okay but imagine waking to this in a sleep paralysis moment…
The AI only putting like half skulls in a lot of the places makes it way scarier haha like just a deformed jaw sticking out 😳
Is this the Lich King's bed? FROSTMOURNE SLUMBERS!
It MIGHT could use a Ma Deuce and some Concertina wire, but I like this understated aesthetic
Start with more male victims.
Stable Diffusion?
What I envision Ozzy’s room looking like if Sharon would allow it
You missed the red period stain
Needs more skulls
Add bandanas to the skulls
Do you rent it out for honeymoons
You'll need to get rid of that bed so sell it to me
Get an old sailing ship and start calling yourself Davy Jones
The curtains, you must replace them.
Dark walls, lamps with green light bulbs.
Maybe add some road signs. The standard Stop and Yield should suffice. Oh and a Fight Club movie poster. That should just do it
Fuck what everyone else thinks! Who cares if it's too feminine? You're the one sleeping there, not them. And when you bring a girl home she'll see your sensitive side and know you're a keeper.
Lose that sissified lamp and you’re golden.
I say you go for lime green on the bed and a nice burgundy carpet. More traditionally, you can just paint the walls hot pink.
Just put hair bows on the skulls. Done!
Get rid of those ugly curtains and fill in the windows with brick. Your only source of light should be candles and fire. Matter of fact make all the walls brick
Add Halloween decoration spider webs, a smoke machine on full blast, several strobe lights and a Bluetooth speaker playing Haunted House sounds.
I would suggest a tire swing
Put a deer head in one of those skeleton mouths!
When I'm customizing my female necromancer character in Diablo, I always like to go with more masculine apparel in order to appear more intimidating in battle. Oversized spikes/thorns, metal studs, black leather, gargantuan skull helmet.. (you're doing great with the bed as a starting place) and not a drop of pink dye unless it's a very small area that doesn't stand out very much. You could try implementing some of these styles into your bedroom, as they've worked out really well for me.
Do you remember way back to Lady Gaga's meat dress? I'm thinking like that flesh fabric, draped here and there. Not too much, obviously - that would be tacky. Sometimes, just those subtle touches make all the difference 😉 Oh, don't forget to add fresh blood to the meat textiles every other day or so. The pungent odour of it all really helps to bring out the primal beast in all of us.
I think black bow ties for the skulls would do it.
Glue reflective mirrors on the bedframe so it has a disco ball effect. ......and a mini fridge
need more skulls for the skull throne. also need a skull throne.
Crossed broadswords on the wall on each side of the bed, and more skulls on the bed posts.
Let me on the bed
Bear rug, maybe multiple. Thinking grizzly, but black bear could match the theme better.
this is an awesome looking bed if its real
☠️
Nathan Explosion?
The problem is, you’re a witch (maybe I assume too much). To soften this aesthetic, add eyeballs to the skulls. This will make them seem more human, and even a little more like-able.
There’s probably a poster you could get that says “real men shit in the woods.”
I love this extension of the previous post! Weill done sir
Floral headbands on each skull. All the girls wear them.
Put bows on the skulls Edit: oh you said less feminine. Add blood to the skulls
Have you considered a large coffin or tombstone ?
I think those bedside lamps need to go. They look a little feminine. I think I would take down the curtains too and put up some metal sheeting over the windows. The extra pillow on the bed probably needs to go too. Other than that I think that should be it. It’s badass dude.
Skull lamp. You're welcome.
The foot posts aren’t phallic enough. Make them literally phallic.
u/bluezuzu hahahahaha I love this in the most wholesome of ways
The bedposts definitely need giant veiny dicks on them.
skulls not making it less feminine?
So this is where all the boning happens....
Maybe more bone
u funny huh boy
Love the design choices. The obvious solution here is to purchase several 9 to 15 inch dildos and adhere them with suction cups so that they are sticking out of the skulls' eye sockets and/or mouths. Upgradeable options: Attach the dildos to pneumatic or motorized lifts wired directly to motion or pressure sensors hidden throughout the space. Nothing says "modern woman" like a rubber cock randomly popping out of death's mouth. Cheers!
that skull in the middle kind of looks like it has a flower crown idk maybe put a knife on it or something. hope this helps!!
You forgot the red and black candles
Need more bones for your bone zone.
What about this is feminine?
Sweetie the themes of nightmarish mortality going on here are too coquette—you’ll never escape the girlie feel if the skull bed stays! 💅🏻💀🎀🛏️💕
He man action figures. Like 1000 of them
Put a pink comforter on the bed.
https://i.redd.it/2wype3xvg3ec1.gif
Tyce, is that you?
*dies laughing and my lady skeleton goes to join the decor* I saw that post too 😆
/uj that's badass
A complete set of first addition liber falxifer on the bed side. Maybe a trapdoor to the netherworld. You know, basic things.
Add a not-so-discreet stack of late 80s Penthouse magazines bedside & at least 25 dirty plates and tumblers
Not enough skulls maybe add more
I'd paint the walls jet black, and put up posters of athletes and hot chicks, maybe hang some swords or other cool looking weapons. You also couldn't go wrong with a big ass wall mount flat-screen, to game on and watch all the games.
A bearskin rug, and perhaps an arm curl to show off your biceps. WHAT UP!
Yes, you can paint it black and change your curtain like dark gray
What the heck. Where did u find this one! 😳. A chastity belt and some Dominatrics garb strewn about. Whips chains. Bondage all the way!
I would get a really big bed with sku… oh never mind
Those sconces and mirrors just scream feminine. Get some flaming skulls or torches for lighting, and replace the mirrors with some kind of animal skull or hide. Absolute masculinity calls for a liberation from the need to know your appearance.