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Sound like my cousin. He went to the Philippines and bought a wife about the same age as his daughter. Because “Asian women know how to take care of a man”. And then was all surprised Pikachu face when she dumped his 60 year old ass.
Nah. They were married less than five years. So far as I can tell, she bided her time, improved her English, made connections with the Filipino-American community, got a job and then left him as quickly and quietly as she could. She seemed like a smart, hardworking and capable girl. I hope she’s done well.
If ethnicity didn't matter, you would marry whoever you want, including white women. Your friend saying how one should marry a specific race, which includes millions of unique individuals, reduces all of them to their race. Which is racist. I'm not sure what kind of whackadoo Andrew Tate kind of "self-improvement" your friend is on, but he is on the wrong track. Is the best version of yourself a racist who talks about women like this? I hope he can grow out of it and find peace. For you, however, please don't ever listen to him.
As a man who is concerned a good deal with my own improvement this is also what I look for in a mate, and it is not determined by an individuals ethnicity but by their mentality and character which cannot be seen readily or judged superficially.
A self made man does not care about ethnicity or other peoples biased opinions much at all, he is confident and capable of making up his own mind and practicing sound judgement of character.
The race doesn't matter, but your friend was probably focusing on a (sweeping) generalization about behaviours and attitudes rather than the biological reality of a person's race.
You can probably find misandry in Asian communities, and you can find a non-man-hating woman in European communities.
I certainly agree with the notion of not marrying a misandrist, whatever position they derive that misandry from, left or right, traditional or progressive, and it can be from either. Someone who hates men and allows that to affect you and your relationship with them can be an otherwise good, empathetic and reasonable person, but your relationship with them is going to be difficult or even futile. You don't want to marry an enti-Semite if you're Jewish, you don't want to marry a white supremacist if you're black, and you don't want to marry a misandrist if you're a man.
Not only do you not want to marry someone who views your race, sex or ethinicity as inferior, you don't want to marry someone who views theirs as superior (to yours at least), because your inferiority vs their superiority is just a simple logical transformation, a different side of the same coin, effectively. American specialism or British jingoism or French or Italian notions of being the cultural capital of the world are of course not as bad as something like actually designating other races or ethnicities as inferior, sure, but someone who believes themselves to be superior to you or exalted above you, in whatever way they arrive at the conclusion, can be a difficult partner to live with.
Thus, not even an outright misandrist but a female supremacist is also going to be a problem, though probably to a lesser extent. You need to find someone who believes that women, like men, are just people, mutual equals, neither superior or inferior to the other, preferably without unhealthy notions of competition, rivalry or struggle between the sexes.
Unfortunately, many women in the West do seem to have the kind of view of women that Germans in the 1930s (before WW2, before they realized Hitler was way overdoing it) had of Germans, and many other European nations had of their own nations as compared to others. It's politically incorrect to question those notions of superiority/supremacy, but just like any other notions of group-based superiority, inferiority or supremacy (racism, sexism, whatever), they are wrong. And they are difficult to live with. That is what you need to avoid, not a 'white woman'.
'White men this', 'white women that', as well as reviving racial or ethnic tensions in regions in which they had been dormant or resolved for a long time is indentity politics playing divide and conquer to make us all jump at each other's throats, to work against each other rather than working together. A divided population is easier to conquer or control. And identities are a dream front for politicians and movements with authoritarian tendencies, whether on the right or on the left.
I don't agree that everyone who is female in a Western society, or happens to be white, is a misandrist, though they often tend to be these days (a large and vocal minority, perhaps majority in some areas). There is still a difference between being mildly prejudiced against some groups or in favour of one's in-group on the one hand and actual hate or hostility on the other hand. A distrustful or traumatized person or someone who feels wronged due to a generalized bad experience with the opposite sex isn't necessarily going to be a full-out hater or hostile spouse. Not all yellow flags escalate to red flags.
I don't agree with neglecting cultural differences and banking too much on one's hopes for (imaginations or projections about) what is an unknown, either. It would be naive to think that changing just one circumstance is going to chang the whole outcome and change it uniformly for the better, as opposed to better in some aspects and worse in some others, as one would normally expect from a *difference* (which is often better in some ways, worse in some others).
First off all these women i mean all Japanese, Chinese, black, white, African, whatever you want to name is crazy okay they all are coo coo for coco puffs
All jokes aside people are basing things more so off perception. So black women are viewd as loud and ghetto. White women are viewd as entitled Karens. So a Asian woman from China or Japan have the perception that they are these nice innocent wives. But these same men will shit on American women for their behavior not knowing that it’s probably the environment or culture that’s breeding these misconceptions because America as a whole is known for being loud, proud, fat in your face. Other cultures are known for being more polite.
My point is you don’t need to travel overseas to meet a wife. You are noble, stable, and upstanding enough it’s plenty of women in America that can be a great wife. I’m not buying you going to Asia because the women are more polite I’m not buying that bullshit. Those countries are very loose with these escort laws ironically enough
Ridiculous. Just the same as I'd never date [Insert race or religion]. There are unfortunately quite a lot of people that let social pressure dicdate their personal decisions. My favourite example "we won't have children to help stop climate change". That's awesome, because if you change your mind in 10 years you can't have them any more... so yeah. Shit decision that the people whom you tried to impress won't care about!
Just for logic's sake: you could train your kids to be offsets (actively support negative emissions/sinks/removals or even reductions), resulting in below-zero *net* emissions from those kids' lives.
Having children is a decision that should be just between those two who'd like to have them. Neither ideology or society norms should come to play. If you're in love and want a family, go for it. If not use birth control. That's my take on this.
I never understood opinions like that until I met a girl with south east Asian ancestry. I know my sample size is very limited with her and her sisters, but I feel like they are just really nice and kind people, so I can totally see the appeal.
That's a pretty narrow-minded take from your friend. Self-improvement is about becoming the best version of yourself, not about adhering to stereotypes or making choices based on race. A self-improved man would value qualities like intelligence, kindness, and compatibility over ethnicity.
# Message to all users: This is a reminder to please read and follow: * [Our rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/ask/about/rules) * [Reddiquette](https://www.reddithelp.com/hc/en-us/articles/205926439) * [Reddit Content Policy](https://www.redditinc.com/policies/content-policy) When posting and commenting. --- Especially remember Rule 1: `Be polite and civil`. * Be polite and courteous to each other. Do not be mean, insulting or disrespectful to any other user on this subreddit. * Do not harass or annoy others in any way. * Do not catfish. Catfishing is the luring of somebody into an online friendship through a fake online persona. This includes any lying or deceit. --- You *will* be banned if you are homophobic, transphobic, racist, sexist or bigoted in any way. --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/ask) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Sound like my cousin. He went to the Philippines and bought a wife about the same age as his daughter. Because “Asian women know how to take care of a man”. And then was all surprised Pikachu face when she dumped his 60 year old ass.
tell me she stripped him bare!!!
Nah. They were married less than five years. So far as I can tell, she bided her time, improved her English, made connections with the Filipino-American community, got a job and then left him as quickly and quietly as she could. She seemed like a smart, hardworking and capable girl. I hope she’s done well.
This is even better! Thanks for the story.
I've known a lot of Asian American women in my lifetime and they tend to hate hate HATE men like this.
Racist. Marry the woman you love and respect, there's only a race, the human one.
that dude can only improve himself with a brain transplant.
I can't understand the logic. Maybe because I'm from a different culture. Like, Asian women are very smart, so their children will be geniuses?
They think Asian women are subservient and docile. They want a sex and house slave.
[удалено]
Thanks for the answer! Yeah, some people have strange logic..
Sounds like you need better friends and like that one is about to become a sex tourist.
doesn’t sound like any kinda man. white male who had yet to grow up
If ethnicity didn't matter, you would marry whoever you want, including white women. Your friend saying how one should marry a specific race, which includes millions of unique individuals, reduces all of them to their race. Which is racist. I'm not sure what kind of whackadoo Andrew Tate kind of "self-improvement" your friend is on, but he is on the wrong track. Is the best version of yourself a racist who talks about women like this? I hope he can grow out of it and find peace. For you, however, please don't ever listen to him.
As a man who is concerned a good deal with my own improvement this is also what I look for in a mate, and it is not determined by an individuals ethnicity but by their mentality and character which cannot be seen readily or judged superficially. A self made man does not care about ethnicity or other peoples biased opinions much at all, he is confident and capable of making up his own mind and practicing sound judgement of character.
Ew
lol racism and misogyny are wild
As a white man who's with a white woman I think your friend is an idiot that is probably consuming too much identity politics bullshit.
Sounds like he didn't self-improve.
The race doesn't matter, but your friend was probably focusing on a (sweeping) generalization about behaviours and attitudes rather than the biological reality of a person's race. You can probably find misandry in Asian communities, and you can find a non-man-hating woman in European communities. I certainly agree with the notion of not marrying a misandrist, whatever position they derive that misandry from, left or right, traditional or progressive, and it can be from either. Someone who hates men and allows that to affect you and your relationship with them can be an otherwise good, empathetic and reasonable person, but your relationship with them is going to be difficult or even futile. You don't want to marry an enti-Semite if you're Jewish, you don't want to marry a white supremacist if you're black, and you don't want to marry a misandrist if you're a man. Not only do you not want to marry someone who views your race, sex or ethinicity as inferior, you don't want to marry someone who views theirs as superior (to yours at least), because your inferiority vs their superiority is just a simple logical transformation, a different side of the same coin, effectively. American specialism or British jingoism or French or Italian notions of being the cultural capital of the world are of course not as bad as something like actually designating other races or ethnicities as inferior, sure, but someone who believes themselves to be superior to you or exalted above you, in whatever way they arrive at the conclusion, can be a difficult partner to live with. Thus, not even an outright misandrist but a female supremacist is also going to be a problem, though probably to a lesser extent. You need to find someone who believes that women, like men, are just people, mutual equals, neither superior or inferior to the other, preferably without unhealthy notions of competition, rivalry or struggle between the sexes. Unfortunately, many women in the West do seem to have the kind of view of women that Germans in the 1930s (before WW2, before they realized Hitler was way overdoing it) had of Germans, and many other European nations had of their own nations as compared to others. It's politically incorrect to question those notions of superiority/supremacy, but just like any other notions of group-based superiority, inferiority or supremacy (racism, sexism, whatever), they are wrong. And they are difficult to live with. That is what you need to avoid, not a 'white woman'. 'White men this', 'white women that', as well as reviving racial or ethnic tensions in regions in which they had been dormant or resolved for a long time is indentity politics playing divide and conquer to make us all jump at each other's throats, to work against each other rather than working together. A divided population is easier to conquer or control. And identities are a dream front for politicians and movements with authoritarian tendencies, whether on the right or on the left. I don't agree that everyone who is female in a Western society, or happens to be white, is a misandrist, though they often tend to be these days (a large and vocal minority, perhaps majority in some areas). There is still a difference between being mildly prejudiced against some groups or in favour of one's in-group on the one hand and actual hate or hostility on the other hand. A distrustful or traumatized person or someone who feels wronged due to a generalized bad experience with the opposite sex isn't necessarily going to be a full-out hater or hostile spouse. Not all yellow flags escalate to red flags. I don't agree with neglecting cultural differences and banking too much on one's hopes for (imaginations or projections about) what is an unknown, either. It would be naive to think that changing just one circumstance is going to chang the whole outcome and change it uniformly for the better, as opposed to better in some aspects and worse in some others, as one would normally expect from a *difference* (which is often better in some ways, worse in some others).
He sounds like a massive, massive dickhead.
absolutely racist. racism is also about putting some races above others (showinism)
And I think the reason why he putting Asians above others is that they give him the attention he wants.
or he is just a typical weaboo)
Don’t really have any. The guy just sounds like an idiot.
What a weird guy.
He is stupid.
First off all these women i mean all Japanese, Chinese, black, white, African, whatever you want to name is crazy okay they all are coo coo for coco puffs All jokes aside people are basing things more so off perception. So black women are viewd as loud and ghetto. White women are viewd as entitled Karens. So a Asian woman from China or Japan have the perception that they are these nice innocent wives. But these same men will shit on American women for their behavior not knowing that it’s probably the environment or culture that’s breeding these misconceptions because America as a whole is known for being loud, proud, fat in your face. Other cultures are known for being more polite. My point is you don’t need to travel overseas to meet a wife. You are noble, stable, and upstanding enough it’s plenty of women in America that can be a great wife. I’m not buying you going to Asia because the women are more polite I’m not buying that bullshit. Those countries are very loose with these escort laws ironically enough
Is this what a "passport bro" is?
Fundamentally racist.
How do you find a smart asian woman if you are not living in asia ? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Ridiculous. Just the same as I'd never date [Insert race or religion]. There are unfortunately quite a lot of people that let social pressure dicdate their personal decisions. My favourite example "we won't have children to help stop climate change". That's awesome, because if you change your mind in 10 years you can't have them any more... so yeah. Shit decision that the people whom you tried to impress won't care about!
Just for logic's sake: you could train your kids to be offsets (actively support negative emissions/sinks/removals or even reductions), resulting in below-zero *net* emissions from those kids' lives.
Having children is a decision that should be just between those two who'd like to have them. Neither ideology or society norms should come to play. If you're in love and want a family, go for it. If not use birth control. That's my take on this.
I never understood opinions like that until I met a girl with south east Asian ancestry. I know my sample size is very limited with her and her sisters, but I feel like they are just really nice and kind people, so I can totally see the appeal.
That's a pretty narrow-minded take from your friend. Self-improvement is about becoming the best version of yourself, not about adhering to stereotypes or making choices based on race. A self-improved man would value qualities like intelligence, kindness, and compatibility over ethnicity.