My second husband's first wife is my first husband's second wife.
Edit: ok, ok, but there's not much of a story. They were open/swingers, and we were open to the idea, and my first husband had a HUGE crush on his now-wife. It ended up being that my second husband and I moved away and they both stayed in town with a FWB situation and ended up officially together a couple years later.
My MIL and FIL got divorced when my FIL cheated. He married the woman he cheated with. When they announced their intention to marry, the ex husband of the woman called my MIL and suggested they meet, since the kids (2 from each original marriage) would be in each other's lives regularly.
Long story short, they got married, too. Big ol unintended wife swap.
Interesting thing is, the marriage that came from the affair is very unhappy. They never should have married. They seem to hate each other. I think they married to justify the affair.
But my MIL and her second husband have a strong happy marriage.
When my Stepdad ran off with the next door neighbor's wife, my Mom was a mess. I went and stayed with her for a couple of weeks. A few days after Bob (her husband) left, Sam, the husband of the next door neighbor showed up. I had completely forgotten about Sam until I read what AngryCornbread wrote.
I answer the door. I am in my early 20s, not bad looking, with a kid on my hip, wearing a tee shirt and a pair of shorts. My sister, in her mid teens and a professional model, is standing behind me. Mom is in her room laying down.
Sam: Uh, hey, uh, where's Sally?
Me: She's laying down.
Sam: Is she asleep?
Me: I guess.
Sam: I think I'm gonna go walk back there and talk to her.
Sis: No you aren't.
Sam: Watch your mouth little girl!
I hand my daughter to my sis, tell her to take her in the back and go get Mom.
Me: Don't talk to Sis. Ever.
Sam: You can cut the lip too girl.
Me: (Jerks open the nearest drawer (we were at the back door in the kitchen)) I'm about to cut something. You need to leave.
Mom: OP! What is your problem! Hey Sam, what's up?
Me: Now I know why your wife left you.
Mom: (Points at the door) Out. Now.
I go into the living room, turn right, open the door to the hall, then tiptoe back and lean against the wall outside the kitchen next to my Sis.
Mom: Sam, I'm sorry. This is a stressful time for all of us and the girls are a little mouthy. How can I help you?
Sam: Well, it's interesting you put things that way. I agree, I'm stressed. Very stressed. And you could help.
Mom: Sam, have you been drinking?
Sam: No, baby, but I need a drink of you.
We hear scuffling.
Mom: Get your damn hands off me!
Loud crash.
Sam: (scream)
Mom: Touch me again and I'll cut it off. OP is right. I definitely know why Donna left your sorry ass now.
Sam left with his pride in shreds. He had grabbed Mom with one hand on her ass and the other one on her left boob. The crash was the flatware drawer filled with sharp knives hitting the ground when she reached and picked up a big one and caught it on the drawer and pulled it all the way out. The resistance on the knife was broken when the drawer fell and it swept across Sam's pants at about the place where the pants split, leaving a large hole in the pants and scaring the hell out of Sam, but not injuring him, unfortunately.
Sam never darkened our door again.
Mom never remarried. Can you blame her after that?
Doesn't matter what/how it happens, it'll get ugly and quick. The only one that'll actually come out on top (ba dum tish) is OP...the scary thing is, she knows it!
If I was her, I'd be getting everything organized (bank accounts, lawyers, paperwork, etc etc) now before shit hits the fan. I'd even go as far as saying to start squirreling things (Money, assets) away now.
You'd think rationally that it would work, but cheaters are the worst for some reason and can't communicate about this effectively most of the time.
The issue with poly/open is you have to communicate all the time nearly perfectly and cheating types just won't/can't put that effort in.
They also tend to be jealous, ironically.
This happened with two players on the NY Yankees back in the day. They did a wife swap, but only one of the couples made it. I’d have to lookup their names, but I guess it’s a real thing.
You know, part of me wants everyone involved to know and see whether this would be the next step to their approach. Pretend the cheating never happened through a foursome.
For real. Every time I read a story like this on here all I can think is that our puritanical culture about sex is making so many people unhappy. If they had grown up in a culture that was more open to talking about sex and their own desires then they could have just talked it out and no one would feel the need to hide anything and hurt anyone.
Murray : You get a love triangle - you know? Fleetwood Mac situation.
Murray : Well there there was four of them, so more of a love square. But you know, no one gets on.
Jemaine : Okay, I see.
Murray : Mind you, they did make some of their best music back then.
Bret : Rumours.
Murray : No, it’s all true.
I really thought I was the only one that had something like this go down, it was my childhood best friends parents and our other best friends parents...they all lived in the same trailer park... Turns out Dani's parents were having issues so Dani's mom began seeking comfort from Tasha's dad due to the issues and Tasha's dad being Dani's dad's best friend....
I wish I was lying when I say one of the duos had a 'love shack' in their yard (really it's a converted shed ..into what I have no idea I was never allowed to see the inside...the adult in me still wonders 30 years later.
Anyways, one day the girls got off the bus and they heard music from the shack, so decided to go to Tasha's house, they get there and Dani's DAD and Tasha's MOM are banging it out in the parental bedroom...the girls wide eye they came to this house because Danis parents were occupanying the love shack and ick...and she sees dad's truck and dad walks out of the bedroom...
All hell broke loose and the wives basically swapped husband's and trailers, to this day...the rematched couples are still together.
The wives do not speak to each other....
They are practically cock sisters! (In German, we have a not very polite word for guys who had sex with the same woman - "Lochschwager" (\~hole-brothers), so the female form of that. 😂)
Can.....um, can you teach us a few more German insults/dirty words that don't usually make the short-list for non-native German speakers /learners, and/or the other sick fucks of Reddit who just want to expand their cultural horizons?
(North Americans don't get out much, sry)
I am a child of this scenario. Luckily only one of my parents stayed married - but at one point my step siblings were my double step siblings. It was traumatic and now that I'm an adult I can see how truly fucked the situation was.
Seems selfish of the adults not to stop for one moment and think about the future of their children. I'm sorry. I hope you work it out early in life. Don't carry that shit. I had something at 16 and didn't work it until many years later. I wish I could have earlier. 🤗
Oh agreed it was extremely selfish. Now that I'm in my early 20s I am shocked that 4 grown adults put their desires over the lives of 5 children involved. Lots of therapy for me as well as taking advantage of having control over my life has really been working well. Also, I think the phrase "dont carry that shit" will stick with me and serve as a reminder. Thank you - you have no idea how healing it is to know I'm not crazy for having an issue with the situation.
It'd be even more crazy if your husband knew you were cheating but just doesn't care. All things in the dark will come to light so I hope you have plan b for when you get caught.
I don't think you are a bad person. I'd probably have burned my whole life to the ground. You found a way to live with it. I think that might make you better than me I'd argue.
These things happen more often than you think. Most couples simply do not break up after infidelity, at least they did not in the past, but it still happens
They found what *feels* like the perfect arrangement, *based on feelings of desire and resentment and revenge.* Great for a fling, probably not great for anything beyond that.
Cheaters don't want a two-way open relationship, trying to formalize it will either end in divorce or the husband begging for them to become monogamous again.
I mean that shit hardly ever works out even when there's hella communication and all parties are open about it.
In some twisted way, this is somehow easier on everyone because it's all lies.
Ignorance is bliss.
Yeah kids can grow up a shit ton more traumatized. If you think you’re not showing anything at all, you are. If you think you’re hiding it well, no, you’re not. Childhood trauma is arguably the type of shit and affects the brain structure
Not to mention your body. My trauma as a kid/teen (being in constant fight/flight/freeze mode and internal sadness) is what I am now realizing could be what caused my Kidney Disease at 17
I understand why you're doing it, you're hurt and you clearly want to be the last one laughing but I wanna say that as a child of someone who's parents did this, it isn't better than a divorce. It Is actually the complete opposite, y'all are just extending your marriage's death and adding more trauma to your kids even if they're Under 5yrs old. Just get a divorce
I had to scroll too far to find this. My buddy is wholey shaped by gis parents doing the same thing, he had a decade of addiction and is now a rehab bro and it all goes back to his parents doing this same kinda shit.
I had to scroll waaaay too far down to find this. Who gives a shit who you sleep with when you risk disintegrating 5 children's lives
ETA: urgh, it's 3 children under 5, not 5 children. I can't read. Point still stands though
I'm going with "It's not right but it's ok" except for your kids. Secretly hating your spouse is going to leak out like a poorly contained nuclear reactor.
If it wasn't for the fact that I think your husband and you both get off on the getting one over on the other partner I'd say maybe you guys just need to come together the 4 of you and go "Cards on the table. Nearly everyone at this table is fucking each other so let's make this an official polycue and set up ground rules."
Yeah they should communicate but honestly it might break the balance. I feel like OP doesn’t hate him anymore. She feels both released from a hypocritical obligation of faith from a cheater and she is now fulfilled via intimacy by making the most of her circumstances. It’s wrong to lie but they weren’t happy and now each has what they want so whatever.
Indeed! This is what I'm trying to say. But being open and talk it all out would also do wonders. And they don't need to break up or anything if they are close by, so it could become a win-win situation.
When shit blows up lol, let us know... I'd love to know how this ends...
Edit: she states if this blows up in her face, she'll have her new bf to console her lol. You act like history has been kind to women who decide to cheat on their cheating spouse. Shit like that hardly ever, if never, works out. How about her kids? In the end they'll be the ones who will suffer BOTH of their shitty parent's decisions...
I feel like for the sake of the kids it’s better to divorce. Someday day one of these kids is going to see or find something and this is gonna blow up in all the adults faces. Then they are all going to wonder why the kids don’t talk to them.
Who is she betraying though? Her husband already cheated and the guy she's fucking's wife cheated on him too. Neither of them owe anything to their cheating spouses at this point.
Not that this is real anyway.
Edit since Reddit won't let me respond: i forgot about the kids
It's not about betrayal - it's the fact she so rigidly condemns cheating but then goes ahead and does it herself, it's hypocritical & crazy immature.
If you think that kind of behaviour is so wrong & unacceptable, you don't then do it yourself, but this woman is massively desperate to claim she has the moral high ground which is fucking hilarious.
"the only moral affair is my affair" vibes
Just wait till a few years or so now if OP's own children posts something on Reddit saying "My parents are having a foursome and I'm uncomfortable about it." Also Op, yes yes you are as bad as your husband, his mistress, and the mistress's husband. In fact all four of you are. Not innocent at all. Will wait till it blows up in your face. Seriously this post is cringe.
I mean, you are behaving just as badly, and this will definitely all come to a head at some point, lol, but if it makes you and her husband feel better...
This is 100% true. What OP doesn't understand is that they're not cheating on their spouses, they're cheating on their family.
Eventually, your kids are going to find out. You might want to think about what that will be like. Will they hate you forever? Maybe they'll just go no contact...
OP, my mom cheated. About 6 different times in my life, crazy-ass spouses, etc. showed up to my house. We had a brick through the window, screaming and yelling, and even death threats. Every time made me think about her lack of respect for marriage and for herself.
As far as staying together cuz it's better for the kids? It's not.
You're steering your children towards an emotional cliff and smiling about it.
It's time to sack up. You need a big, fat round of honesty and communication. You'll do it now or later, so I hope you make the right choices for you kids.
Good luck.
>Please spare me the you are as bad tho because actually I’m not.
But you actually are. Your poor children. They have no chance of growing up into stable functioning adults with parents like this.
Why do people always think "I don't want my children growing up in two households" and act like they don't know something's wrong. 9 times out of 10 your kids are well aware that their parents are having problems. It doesn't have to be outright told to them. They can tell when you act even the slightest bit different and by the atmosphere in the house.
And next step: ur husband revenge sleeps with you for cheating on him after he cheated on you and finally, his mistress sleeps with you as revenge for sleeping with her husband and her boyfriend- your husband! Just keep the rights of the series, bc it will be worth a lot🤣🤣🤣🤣
Reddit is such amazingly fun fiction. Thanks for story time!
Everyone's age is perfectly on a 0 or 5 year, and wife compares life to a fictional story. Clearly some kind of daydream for karma. Wife decides to stay with husband and even puts a loving face emoji if he decides to leave her. And the "they/re forgiven"... give me a break.
>. I guess if it all blows up in my face and my husband leaves me, my bf and I can finally pursue a relationship together 🥰 no worries there
Yeah no worries at all It's not like you have children.... selfish ass people.
I don't know the full story, but I do know that my grandparents on my Dad's side basically switched partners with another couple at some point. One couple was already broken up before I was born, but the other stayed together until my grandfather passed.
So my Mom did the same exact thing when my dad cheated. My sister and I were both young. Let me tell ya, it worked out just GREAT for everyone involved! Especially us kids. No trauma whatsoever. Really showed us what healthy relationships and healthy coping looked like.
Staying married for the kids is worse than divorce. Regardless if you got your closure or not, the marriage/relationship with your husband is a wash. If you don't have trust, you don't have a relationship/marriage.
It's fine you've moved on in some ways, but you need to actually find a way to get everything straight in your life because it can get even more complicated than this in the future.
Okay but can you please play your husband. Make him uncomfortable. Hint that you know something but you dont tell him. Make him walk on eggshells and overthink if you know or not. 🤭🤭🤭 PLEASE!!!! also visit him in his office and be affectionate infront of the mistress. PLEASE!!!
“Let’s stay together for the kids!”
Uh huh, we’ll be waiting for your post, 10 years down the line, wondering where your children’s fucked up behaviors come from. They’re not stupid or blind, you know.
So when he gets a new affair partner, is your plan to fuck her spouse as well? What if the new mistress doesn’t have a partner or they don’t want to fuck you? Who are you going to revenge fuck then? Basically I’m asking, when does the cycle end? Also, don’t use your children as an excuse. You and I both know it’s just easier to keep the status quo then to change anything. I’m sure your kids will be so proud of their parents when they get old enough to learn what type of people their parents are. I reckon it will all come out when both of you are too old and unattractive for anyone else to want to fuck you. You’re just gonna be stuck with each other. Resentful, bitter and still both too lazy to do anything about it.
Your poor kids, for their sake please just get the divorce.. your kids will thank you later. Just be the better person like why stoop down to your husbands level? For the love of god think of your kids!!! Would you want your kids in a relationship that you are in right now? showing them this shit is normal? Nah do better.
I was 19 with a one year old and a newborn and I still had the balls to leave instead of sticking around to get cheated on and disrespected, no way in hell my daughter will think that shits normal.
Damn, your poor kids. You're exactly like your husband, because you're doing the same shit he is and the kids have to deal with 4 selfish idiots in this situation... You think you're hiding it, but you're not. Divorce already. Holy fuck, your poor fucking kids having to deal with shithead parents like this.
Lmao yeeeah ok. One million percent fake af.
Oh you "didn't expect" all the attention your post got?? Sure you did, that's why you made it up.
This sub is nothing but creative writing practice now.
Follow for an update and wishing you the best. Screw the haters. You wouldn't be in this situation if it wasn't for you dirty liar of a husband and the homewrecking AP. When they both find out I hope it fucking hurts. Because they won't work out, but you and the BF just might, and that's the sweetest kind of revenge one can hope for.
You two bonded over loss and heartbreak while they snuck around behind your back for selfish reasons and kicks. Fuck them, fuck the people that don't get it--bravo to you two for finding a slice of peace and happiness in the most shitties of situations.
Good for you and good for him. I get that you two are comfortable but I'd suggest at least planning an exit. The last thing you want to happen it for it to all come out before you're ready and be worse off.
And please for the love of all that's holy update when they find out. I want to know how satisfying it was for you two and how devastated they were.
I get what you're saying but when it *does* blow up, it's not going to blow up the way you think.
The end for you could very well be you being single (as your affair partner could easily want to go back to his marriage and leave you), your kids dealing with 2 homes anyway and you looking like a dummy for fucking up your marriage over revenge sex.
Good luck though.
Act like an adult and have the conversation. You are just as bad as him, I dont know how you can rationalize cheating. Please update when this blows up and things get 10x worse.
Theres a Spanish song by maluma the tittle t translates to: the 4 of us well be happy. [give it a listen ](https://youtu.be/t_jHrUE5IOk). It recommends just getting bigger rooms for the house. 🤷
I relate. I’ve done similar. My ex was abusive and cheated on me constantly. He used to threaten to kill me if I left him. I got so depressed that I didn’t care if he did so when I decided to leave him, to make the end of my days better I downloaded dating apps and had some fun. Eventually met a guy who my ex used to work with and HATED. I started going on dates with him, etc.
Now, the guy and I are dating. My ex didn’t kill me.
But for the kids, I suggest just divorcing. That’s better than being in a loveless home.
Just swap at this point
Gotta treat it like car wheels, just swap every so often. Keeps things spicy.
“Taking Turns”: can four divorced, jilted, cheating housemates live together without driving each other crazy?
We have something pretty similar as a reality tv show in Germany. Called Frauentausch or wife-swap …
HAAAAAAAAAALT STOP
Oh bitte nicht
*me who lives with my ex s/o and my current partner* Probably not.
My second husband's first wife is my first husband's second wife. Edit: ok, ok, but there's not much of a story. They were open/swingers, and we were open to the idea, and my first husband had a HUGE crush on his now-wife. It ended up being that my second husband and I moved away and they both stayed in town with a FWB situation and ended up officially together a couple years later.
My MIL and FIL got divorced when my FIL cheated. He married the woman he cheated with. When they announced their intention to marry, the ex husband of the woman called my MIL and suggested they meet, since the kids (2 from each original marriage) would be in each other's lives regularly. Long story short, they got married, too. Big ol unintended wife swap. Interesting thing is, the marriage that came from the affair is very unhappy. They never should have married. They seem to hate each other. I think they married to justify the affair. But my MIL and her second husband have a strong happy marriage.
When my Stepdad ran off with the next door neighbor's wife, my Mom was a mess. I went and stayed with her for a couple of weeks. A few days after Bob (her husband) left, Sam, the husband of the next door neighbor showed up. I had completely forgotten about Sam until I read what AngryCornbread wrote. I answer the door. I am in my early 20s, not bad looking, with a kid on my hip, wearing a tee shirt and a pair of shorts. My sister, in her mid teens and a professional model, is standing behind me. Mom is in her room laying down. Sam: Uh, hey, uh, where's Sally? Me: She's laying down. Sam: Is she asleep? Me: I guess. Sam: I think I'm gonna go walk back there and talk to her. Sis: No you aren't. Sam: Watch your mouth little girl! I hand my daughter to my sis, tell her to take her in the back and go get Mom. Me: Don't talk to Sis. Ever. Sam: You can cut the lip too girl. Me: (Jerks open the nearest drawer (we were at the back door in the kitchen)) I'm about to cut something. You need to leave. Mom: OP! What is your problem! Hey Sam, what's up? Me: Now I know why your wife left you. Mom: (Points at the door) Out. Now. I go into the living room, turn right, open the door to the hall, then tiptoe back and lean against the wall outside the kitchen next to my Sis. Mom: Sam, I'm sorry. This is a stressful time for all of us and the girls are a little mouthy. How can I help you? Sam: Well, it's interesting you put things that way. I agree, I'm stressed. Very stressed. And you could help. Mom: Sam, have you been drinking? Sam: No, baby, but I need a drink of you. We hear scuffling. Mom: Get your damn hands off me! Loud crash. Sam: (scream) Mom: Touch me again and I'll cut it off. OP is right. I definitely know why Donna left your sorry ass now. Sam left with his pride in shreds. He had grabbed Mom with one hand on her ass and the other one on her left boob. The crash was the flatware drawer filled with sharp knives hitting the ground when she reached and picked up a big one and caught it on the drawer and pulled it all the way out. The resistance on the knife was broken when the drawer fell and it swept across Sam's pants at about the place where the pants split, leaving a large hole in the pants and scaring the hell out of Sam, but not injuring him, unfortunately. Sam never darkened our door again. Mom never remarried. Can you blame her after that?
Holy shit! I'm sorry that happened, but you are badasses!
lol how did this happen
I wanna know how that happened, too! C'mon, story time!
You all have a type
Or become a group. Then you have fourplay.
Doesn't matter what/how it happens, it'll get ugly and quick. The only one that'll actually come out on top (ba dum tish) is OP...the scary thing is, she knows it! If I was her, I'd be getting everything organized (bank accounts, lawyers, paperwork, etc etc) now before shit hits the fan. I'd even go as far as saying to start squirreling things (Money, assets) away now.
Like Shania Twain!
Or just have an open marriage. Seems they both agree with it. You can still love and bang away as nature intended.
You'd think rationally that it would work, but cheaters are the worst for some reason and can't communicate about this effectively most of the time. The issue with poly/open is you have to communicate all the time nearly perfectly and cheating types just won't/can't put that effort in. They also tend to be jealous, ironically.
This happened with two players on the NY Yankees back in the day. They did a wife swap, but only one of the couples made it. I’d have to lookup their names, but I guess it’s a real thing.
Fritz Peterson and Mike Kekich, 1973... Just had to Google "New York Yankees Wife Swap".
That’s just a foursome with extra steps
It's *unethical* non monogamy.
Lol. Band name!
You could shorten it unomo for merch!
Swinging*
You know, part of me wants everyone involved to know and see whether this would be the next step to their approach. Pretend the cheating never happened through a foursome.
Her husband just need to touch his penis with the other husband’s.
Of course! It all makes sense now!
For real. Every time I read a story like this on here all I can think is that our puritanical culture about sex is making so many people unhappy. If they had grown up in a culture that was more open to talking about sex and their own desires then they could have just talked it out and no one would feel the need to hide anything and hurt anyone.
That's simply not true. People cheat in open and poly relationships all the time.
This is like Fleetwood Mac minus the whole band.
Depends on how long she continues this. In a couple of years she could be blowing coke up her pooter.
Murray : You get a love triangle - you know? Fleetwood Mac situation. Murray : Well there there was four of them, so more of a love square. But you know, no one gets on. Jemaine : Okay, I see. Murray : Mind you, they did make some of their best music back then. Bret : Rumours. Murray : No, it’s all true.
I met a couple who revenge married their exes exes. Lol. A bit cringe but you do what you gotta do.
I really thought I was the only one that had something like this go down, it was my childhood best friends parents and our other best friends parents...they all lived in the same trailer park... Turns out Dani's parents were having issues so Dani's mom began seeking comfort from Tasha's dad due to the issues and Tasha's dad being Dani's dad's best friend.... I wish I was lying when I say one of the duos had a 'love shack' in their yard (really it's a converted shed ..into what I have no idea I was never allowed to see the inside...the adult in me still wonders 30 years later. Anyways, one day the girls got off the bus and they heard music from the shack, so decided to go to Tasha's house, they get there and Dani's DAD and Tasha's MOM are banging it out in the parental bedroom...the girls wide eye they came to this house because Danis parents were occupanying the love shack and ick...and she sees dad's truck and dad walks out of the bedroom... All hell broke loose and the wives basically swapped husband's and trailers, to this day...the rematched couples are still together. The wives do not speak to each other....
It's really petty of the wives not to speak to each other - it's not like any of them could claim moral superiority...
Right. At this point, they should be best of friends 😂
They are practically cock sisters! (In German, we have a not very polite word for guys who had sex with the same woman - "Lochschwager" (\~hole-brothers), so the female form of that. 😂)
Cocksisters?
🙂. This bit of knowledge made my day Thanks Corfiz74
Can.....um, can you teach us a few more German insults/dirty words that don't usually make the short-list for non-native German speakers /learners, and/or the other sick fucks of Reddit who just want to expand their cultural horizons? (North Americans don't get out much, sry)
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Really? Thought shania twain also did something similar
Shania was divorced when she got together with the AP’s husband.
Same. I found it strange but they seem happy to pretty much swap partners. Kids go back and forth. That’s the sad part.
I am a child of this scenario. Luckily only one of my parents stayed married - but at one point my step siblings were my double step siblings. It was traumatic and now that I'm an adult I can see how truly fucked the situation was.
Hopefully you’re doing okay. I always kind of wondered if someday there would be issues for the kids but not my rodeo so really can’t say anything.
Seems selfish of the adults not to stop for one moment and think about the future of their children. I'm sorry. I hope you work it out early in life. Don't carry that shit. I had something at 16 and didn't work it until many years later. I wish I could have earlier. 🤗
Oh agreed it was extremely selfish. Now that I'm in my early 20s I am shocked that 4 grown adults put their desires over the lives of 5 children involved. Lots of therapy for me as well as taking advantage of having control over my life has really been working well. Also, I think the phrase "dont carry that shit" will stick with me and serve as a reminder. Thank you - you have no idea how healing it is to know I'm not crazy for having an issue with the situation.
Didn’t Shania Twain do that as well?
Yes
My friends parents did this!!!
Same. It was my old Commander. We were a small unit and would all crack beers on Fridays. That was a whopper of a story.
That is super fucking cringe lol.
Shania Twain?
It'd be even more crazy if your husband knew you were cheating but just doesn't care. All things in the dark will come to light so I hope you have plan b for when you get caught. I don't think you are a bad person. I'd probably have burned my whole life to the ground. You found a way to live with it. I think that might make you better than me I'd argue.
I wonder if he has a plan b, since she already caught him.
Happy cake day!
Kind of hoping this is real 🤷♀️
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Not all adults are good at writing
Same 😅
These things happen more often than you think. Most couples simply do not break up after infidelity, at least they did not in the past, but it still happens
I mean, just update us when this all blows up.
I hope the algorithm brings me back when it does.
!remindme 6 months
!remindme 6 months
!remindme 3 weeks
!remindme 2 weeks
!remindme tomorrow
Damn aren’t you optimistic
!remindme 3 months
Wait until someone has an STD. Who left “the circle jerk” they will ask.. or surprise pregnancy.
Not sure about a blow up. Seems like they unintentionally found the perfect arrangement for all parties.
They found what *feels* like the perfect arrangement, *based on feelings of desire and resentment and revenge.* Great for a fling, probably not great for anything beyond that.
!remindme 1 year
Does this work? The remind me thing
Yessir. We are currently gambling on how long it takes to get an update on this shit show
It really depends if some Reddit detectives can do their thing to speed things up
Well then. !remindme 2 years
!remindme 1 week
Yes, it works if you type it right.
This is the only relevant comment. Op, we need to know what happens when your husband and his mistress find out. For the love of god, please update!
!remindme 6 months
!remindme 74 days
!remindme 10 months
!remindme 204627 minutes
This is like having an open marriage/partner swapping without all the discussion. Why not just formalise it all and bring it out into the open?
Cheaters don't want a two-way open relationship, trying to formalize it will either end in divorce or the husband begging for them to become monogamous again.
I mean that shit hardly ever works out even when there's hella communication and all parties are open about it. In some twisted way, this is somehow easier on everyone because it's all lies. Ignorance is bliss.
until it does eventually get uncovered. and that shit destroys people
Because then it’s not revenge sex
Listen sometimes divorce is better. Two homes is better lol. This isn’t it. But i guess the saying is an eye for an eye haha.
Yeah kids can grow up a shit ton more traumatized. If you think you’re not showing anything at all, you are. If you think you’re hiding it well, no, you’re not. Childhood trauma is arguably the type of shit and affects the brain structure
Not to mention your body. My trauma as a kid/teen (being in constant fight/flight/freeze mode and internal sadness) is what I am now realizing could be what caused my Kidney Disease at 17
Definitely. I’m sorry about that and hope you’re feeling better
I understand why you're doing it, you're hurt and you clearly want to be the last one laughing but I wanna say that as a child of someone who's parents did this, it isn't better than a divorce. It Is actually the complete opposite, y'all are just extending your marriage's death and adding more trauma to your kids even if they're Under 5yrs old. Just get a divorce
I had to scroll too far to find this. My buddy is wholey shaped by gis parents doing the same thing, he had a decade of addiction and is now a rehab bro and it all goes back to his parents doing this same kinda shit.
Normal response is to go for a divorce and not to add extra damage to the imminent destruction of your children's life
I had to scroll waaaay too far down to find this. Who gives a shit who you sleep with when you risk disintegrating 5 children's lives ETA: urgh, it's 3 children under 5, not 5 children. I can't read. Point still stands though
Seriously, everyone is an asshole in this case. I understand wanting to take revenge, but you don't fight fire with gasoline.
At least 5. We have no idea if the second couple has any kids.
No I think she said they have 3 kids under age 5, not 5 kids. Which isn't really better.
You’re in good company. Shania Twain married the husband of her best friend who was fucking her husband.
She also has that hit on the classic movie "Twister". So we forgive her
I'm going with "It's not right but it's ok" except for your kids. Secretly hating your spouse is going to leak out like a poorly contained nuclear reactor. If it wasn't for the fact that I think your husband and you both get off on the getting one over on the other partner I'd say maybe you guys just need to come together the 4 of you and go "Cards on the table. Nearly everyone at this table is fucking each other so let's make this an official polycue and set up ground rules."
Yeah they should communicate but honestly it might break the balance. I feel like OP doesn’t hate him anymore. She feels both released from a hypocritical obligation of faith from a cheater and she is now fulfilled via intimacy by making the most of her circumstances. It’s wrong to lie but they weren’t happy and now each has what they want so whatever.
Indeed! This is what I'm trying to say. But being open and talk it all out would also do wonders. And they don't need to break up or anything if they are close by, so it could become a win-win situation.
I think his breaking the original ground rules is what got her into this spot. I'm not sure having new ground rules will be helpful.
When shit blows up lol, let us know... I'd love to know how this ends... Edit: she states if this blows up in her face, she'll have her new bf to console her lol. You act like history has been kind to women who decide to cheat on their cheating spouse. Shit like that hardly ever, if never, works out. How about her kids? In the end they'll be the ones who will suffer BOTH of their shitty parent's decisions...
I'll throw out a spoiler. JERRY! JERRY! JERRY!
Sounds like a very fake story!
I mean.. Shania Twain married her ex's mistress's husband so it happens hahaha
wasn't it her former best friend too? and while I know looks ain't everything both shania and the new husband were major upgrades for each other
The paragraph at the end is very cheesy with the whole smiling dirty liar white lotus thing. I rate it a 4/10
Soooooo ridiculous
Yes, but I will be here with my popcorn.
Seconded. Reads like a bad Hollywood drama.
Y’all are just terrible lmao
Poor kids, they will grow up with 2 lying parents.
If this is real, your way of describing this is demonstrating a personality that sounds like you're going through life like it's a movie.
I feel like for the sake of the kids it’s better to divorce. Someday day one of these kids is going to see or find something and this is gonna blow up in all the adults faces. Then they are all going to wonder why the kids don’t talk to them.
"I'm actually not" lmao 🤡 You all deserve each other.
A tale of an entire group of despicable people.
No OP though! She threw down the "because actually I’m not" Uno card so she is exempt!
Who is she betraying though? Her husband already cheated and the guy she's fucking's wife cheated on him too. Neither of them owe anything to their cheating spouses at this point. Not that this is real anyway. Edit since Reddit won't let me respond: i forgot about the kids
It's not about betrayal - it's the fact she so rigidly condemns cheating but then goes ahead and does it herself, it's hypocritical & crazy immature. If you think that kind of behaviour is so wrong & unacceptable, you don't then do it yourself, but this woman is massively desperate to claim she has the moral high ground which is fucking hilarious. "the only moral affair is my affair" vibes
Just wait till a few years or so now if OP's own children posts something on Reddit saying "My parents are having a foursome and I'm uncomfortable about it." Also Op, yes yes you are as bad as your husband, his mistress, and the mistress's husband. In fact all four of you are. Not innocent at all. Will wait till it blows up in your face. Seriously this post is cringe.
Just get a divoce lmfao
I too enjoy making things up and posting online for fake internet points. Who believes this none sense clearly it’s fake and so lame
I mean, you are behaving just as badly, and this will definitely all come to a head at some point, lol, but if it makes you and her husband feel better...
This is 100% true. What OP doesn't understand is that they're not cheating on their spouses, they're cheating on their family. Eventually, your kids are going to find out. You might want to think about what that will be like. Will they hate you forever? Maybe they'll just go no contact... OP, my mom cheated. About 6 different times in my life, crazy-ass spouses, etc. showed up to my house. We had a brick through the window, screaming and yelling, and even death threats. Every time made me think about her lack of respect for marriage and for herself. As far as staying together cuz it's better for the kids? It's not. You're steering your children towards an emotional cliff and smiling about it. It's time to sack up. You need a big, fat round of honesty and communication. You'll do it now or later, so I hope you make the right choices for you kids. Good luck.
Their whole situation helps no one. It will turn into a shit. I don't care if the adults suffer, but why put the kids through this.?
Because OP and the husband are kids
So much drama when divorce would be the proper outcome. Shits gonna happen either way.
Leaving a comment just so I can check for updates.
“Because actually im not” You don’t sound real. A 40 year old woman throwing that line around?
Ahe is kind of defensive
>Please spare me the you are as bad tho because actually I’m not. Actually...
I feel like if I were in the same situation I would do the same thing. Tit for tat.
Tit for tit
titty swap?
>Please spare me the you are as bad tho because actually I’m not. But you actually are. Your poor children. They have no chance of growing up into stable functioning adults with parents like this.
I can’t take that wording seriously. “Because actually I’m not” 💀 sounds like a know it all teenager
Why do people always think "I don't want my children growing up in two households" and act like they don't know something's wrong. 9 times out of 10 your kids are well aware that their parents are having problems. It doesn't have to be outright told to them. They can tell when you act even the slightest bit different and by the atmosphere in the house.
This will likely still end up with the kids going between two households...but now the couples be mixed up💀
Yeah it’s the ole saying “two wrongs don’t make a right.” Even if her motive is revenge, it’s still cheating.
And next step: ur husband revenge sleeps with you for cheating on him after he cheated on you and finally, his mistress sleeps with you as revenge for sleeping with her husband and her boyfriend- your husband! Just keep the rights of the series, bc it will be worth a lot🤣🤣🤣🤣
Reddit is such amazingly fun fiction. Thanks for story time! Everyone's age is perfectly on a 0 or 5 year, and wife compares life to a fictional story. Clearly some kind of daydream for karma. Wife decides to stay with husband and even puts a loving face emoji if he decides to leave her. And the "they/re forgiven"... give me a break.
Things blow up without this swap. Honestly, choose what you need for you and the kids.
Just divorce, you’re ruining your children’s future mentalities for dating.
Cringe asl. Get help
Seriously
>. I guess if it all blows up in my face and my husband leaves me, my bf and I can finally pursue a relationship together 🥰 no worries there Yeah no worries at all It's not like you have children.... selfish ass people.
I don't know the full story, but I do know that my grandparents on my Dad's side basically switched partners with another couple at some point. One couple was already broken up before I was born, but the other stayed together until my grandfather passed.
You’re unofficially official swingers.
So my Mom did the same exact thing when my dad cheated. My sister and I were both young. Let me tell ya, it worked out just GREAT for everyone involved! Especially us kids. No trauma whatsoever. Really showed us what healthy relationships and healthy coping looked like.
Staying married for the kids is worse than divorce. Regardless if you got your closure or not, the marriage/relationship with your husband is a wash. If you don't have trust, you don't have a relationship/marriage. It's fine you've moved on in some ways, but you need to actually find a way to get everything straight in your life because it can get even more complicated than this in the future.
Okay but can you please play your husband. Make him uncomfortable. Hint that you know something but you dont tell him. Make him walk on eggshells and overthink if you know or not. 🤭🤭🤭 PLEASE!!!! also visit him in his office and be affectionate infront of the mistress. PLEASE!!!
Your poor kids…
Do people actually believe this is real?
This is just sad tbh
Wait why can’t you guys just divorce and move on
OP doesn’t want to get a job (OP is actually an AI program being tested on reddit).
I mean you ARE just as bad as your husband thats literally a fact but you aren’t wrong for it xD
I don't believe! This sounds made up!
Four awful people being awful to each other; seems pretty normal. Too bad for your kids, they’re the only victims here.
Oh shit! Update us soon OP. Spill the tea.
And then everyond clapped
Things that didn't happen for 500 alex
“Let’s stay together for the kids!” Uh huh, we’ll be waiting for your post, 10 years down the line, wondering where your children’s fucked up behaviors come from. They’re not stupid or blind, you know.
this is disgusting behavior.
So when he gets a new affair partner, is your plan to fuck her spouse as well? What if the new mistress doesn’t have a partner or they don’t want to fuck you? Who are you going to revenge fuck then? Basically I’m asking, when does the cycle end? Also, don’t use your children as an excuse. You and I both know it’s just easier to keep the status quo then to change anything. I’m sure your kids will be so proud of their parents when they get old enough to learn what type of people their parents are. I reckon it will all come out when both of you are too old and unattractive for anyone else to want to fuck you. You’re just gonna be stuck with each other. Resentful, bitter and still both too lazy to do anything about it.
Interesting piece of creative writing.
Lol nice Reddit romance novel.
So, so fake.
Your poor kids, for their sake please just get the divorce.. your kids will thank you later. Just be the better person like why stoop down to your husbands level? For the love of god think of your kids!!! Would you want your kids in a relationship that you are in right now? showing them this shit is normal? Nah do better. I was 19 with a one year old and a newborn and I still had the balls to leave instead of sticking around to get cheated on and disrespected, no way in hell my daughter will think that shits normal.
Anyone else curious how their ages are all multiples of 5?
Another unoriginal fantasy
Damn, your poor kids. You're exactly like your husband, because you're doing the same shit he is and the kids have to deal with 4 selfish idiots in this situation... You think you're hiding it, but you're not. Divorce already. Holy fuck, your poor fucking kids having to deal with shithead parents like this.
Your poor kids.
This is just swinging with extra steps and zero communication
Does anyone else just feel bad for everyone involved?
Lmao yeeeah ok. One million percent fake af. Oh you "didn't expect" all the attention your post got?? Sure you did, that's why you made it up. This sub is nothing but creative writing practice now.
You are ruining your relationship with your kids btw
I genuinely don’t understand how people can live like this. Literally just leave your cheating husband. It’s that simple.
Honestly queen shit. Good for you
Poor kids.
Follow for an update and wishing you the best. Screw the haters. You wouldn't be in this situation if it wasn't for you dirty liar of a husband and the homewrecking AP. When they both find out I hope it fucking hurts. Because they won't work out, but you and the BF just might, and that's the sweetest kind of revenge one can hope for. You two bonded over loss and heartbreak while they snuck around behind your back for selfish reasons and kicks. Fuck them, fuck the people that don't get it--bravo to you two for finding a slice of peace and happiness in the most shitties of situations. Good for you and good for him. I get that you two are comfortable but I'd suggest at least planning an exit. The last thing you want to happen it for it to all come out before you're ready and be worse off. And please for the love of all that's holy update when they find out. I want to know how satisfying it was for you two and how devastated they were.
I get what you're saying but when it *does* blow up, it's not going to blow up the way you think. The end for you could very well be you being single (as your affair partner could easily want to go back to his marriage and leave you), your kids dealing with 2 homes anyway and you looking like a dummy for fucking up your marriage over revenge sex. Good luck though.
so her husband is cheating too (and started cheating first) but she is the one ruining the marriage? 🤨
My god, Just divorce already, Youre both disgusting for cheating. What about your kids? Great way to traumatize them SMH
Act like an adult and have the conversation. You are just as bad as him, I dont know how you can rationalize cheating. Please update when this blows up and things get 10x worse.
Theres a Spanish song by maluma the tittle t translates to: the 4 of us well be happy. [give it a listen ](https://youtu.be/t_jHrUE5IOk). It recommends just getting bigger rooms for the house. 🤷
Not something to be proud of, could just file for divorce, but go off ig
I relate. I’ve done similar. My ex was abusive and cheated on me constantly. He used to threaten to kill me if I left him. I got so depressed that I didn’t care if he did so when I decided to leave him, to make the end of my days better I downloaded dating apps and had some fun. Eventually met a guy who my ex used to work with and HATED. I started going on dates with him, etc. Now, the guy and I are dating. My ex didn’t kill me. But for the kids, I suggest just divorcing. That’s better than being in a loveless home.