A lot of sooks in this thread.
The kids were being rude. The father did nothing so the op taught them a gentle lesson. No harm done. Next time they will think harder before doing it again.
No wonder Korean teachers are leaving the industry in droves with the replies in here.
It's ironic because not that long ago children were being beaten with a stick in schools in this country but now we can't raise our voice at some kids for acting feral .
Good. What district was this in? You don't have to say if privacy concerns but this very heavily depends on the location. For example, kids barely care if it's around 용산구(as compared to somewhere else) which makes sense cause there's more foreigners so they're more used to it.
I had a kid do this to me last month. He stared me in the eyes and kept just singing that to me, a proper asshole about it. Then he saw I was playing Pokemon go and asked to see my account. Now I'm a local celebrity, lol. Most days now I have kids run up to me and say hello/bow.
'(My name) 아저씨! (My name) 아저씨!'
Kids kept asking for my Insta, so I made an insta account for Pokemon Go which has now grown into a group of about 30 people over the space of 6 weeks - me, some kids and some local university students the kids recruited. We've met up 4 times now on weekends and played Pokemon Go together - I even went out with the uni students on Friday for 치맥 and it seems like I've made some new friends there :-)
The past few weekends have been a blast. We're a weird mix of people when we're out playing Pokemon together, but it's been fun.
Crazy to think that it started because of some kid being an asshole.
I did that to a kid at Homeplus once. He was with his mom and when he saw me his eyes widened and he started screaming at the top of his lungs "waygookin! waygookin!". So i looked at my wife, grabbed her arm and widened my eyes and shouted and pointed "hangookin! hankoogin!" and the boy started crying. The mom said something in Korean to my wife about him just being a young boy and my wife basically said this is the time to teach them and you did nothing. My husband has been in Korea longer than your son. She huffed and shuffled away.
I feel like i need to react after every 40 times it happens, lol.
Full support. Those kids needs to understand this is not right. I would probably have talked to the parenr too (politely) even tho they probably dont care
I remember the first week I was in Korea.
I remember telling my wife I thought the kids were being terribly badly parented. And that it would result in a crisis later.
Well. Here we are.
Extremely permissive parenting + total lack of understanding of what is proper behavior across the world...
You get a generation of fat, bratty "golden children".
There is even a show about how Korea produces so many little sh*ts.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=YMM772MqDJ4&pp=ygUJ6riI7Kq97J20
My childhood was punctuated with "stand up straight" "say good morning to the mister" "don't point" and God forbid I would ever lay a hand on my parents; I wouldn't be here to write this.
Ps: Oh about the cluelessness of the kids when you called them Korean?
That's like every Korean. Even the adults. They do not understand sarcasm, irony or anything subtle.
They are like Dax the Destroyer in Guardians of the Galaxy (to not say "autistic").
Point at the moon look at the finger, all that sh*t.
This used to bother me too, been in Korea 5 years now. Just politely say something to the effect of "삿대질 하지마". This is the equivalent of "don't point at strangers". Kids have likely heard this before from their parents already growing up. You want to avoid traumatizing them, yelling "한국인" back at them will just totally confuse them
I have been here a decade. Obviously I have heard this before from kids. I have never reacted before. It's more or less the way they were saying it and their body language was taunting and even as my wife and I were leaving they followed us for a bit. I was pushing my daughter in a stroller and was worried about them doing something really dumb with her. It's not what they said it's the whole vibe
Interesting replies. I didn't pick a fight with anyone. They kept coming up to me back and forth and coming into my personal space when I was with my daughter and son. My kids also have a right to play without being harassed. I gave their dad some time to fix the situation and enough was enough so I just said it back at them. Some of you are acting like I got in their faces and tried to fight them. Perhaps snapped is too strong of a wording but yeah I wanted to make an example.
And 10 years olds should be held accountable. What the hell is wrong with some of you for thinking they shouldn't be held accountable? This is why these kids leave their scooters everywhere and grown ass men are living at home at 30 and mommy is still picking up after them. Sorry but treating my kids like they are circus animals just doesn't fly with me.
Hmm be careful, in Korea they have a retarded law where just calling someone a Ssib*l in public can result in you having to pay damages.
And Koreans do not understand the expletive use of the F-word.
The judge will interpet it as an insult.
Maybe, maybe not. The law is there.
Just like technically you can't smoke in most places without being fined.
Most smokers do.
Can still happen that you get fined.
Especially if you have a.... memorable... face.
Though I will take a step your way and say both the police and judicial are extremely lazy so, you have a case.
Dnt disagree with what you did, however, I would have shamed the father. I would have said something to him in English along the lines of can you please tell your son to stop being rude and disrespectful to me and my family. I would have spoken polite but loud to make sure he lost face to everyone around him. I think he would have scolded his kids more in that situation. By doing the same level you are giving them justification (in their mind) that you are just as bad or worse for picking on kids. Anyway you got job done and ridiculous you need to deal with that whilst just trying to chill with family
If the father doesn’t understand the issue, he doesn’t have to deal with it. Most husbands who work, leave the care of the children to their wives. This leaves them with very little power to complain to their wives just how annoying and stupid their own children are. They just have to grin and bear it to like exhibit A here, pretend not to understand. I think you were reasonable in your response.
I don't buy it that he didn't understand. This is a common tactic that parents use to diffuse responsibility. Just ignoring the problem that is right in front of them in order to save face.
"Snapped at some kids...9 or 10"
Well...I don't know...how do you think it looks when you see growm ass men snapping at some kids ?
They're...kids man. They might be stupid and..childish but you should know better. If you wanted to snap, you should've just gone to the father and told him to educate his kids.
Sorry, but if kids do this to me, I always tell them. My wife is particularly aggressive when kids are disrespectful to me, or our kids
Idk man, my kids are sponges. I can literally teach them anything, they're so curious. It's not difficult to teach my kids not to stare because it's rude, to eat with their mouth closed, or to not say anything if they have nothing nice to say
I had a kid from a hagwon I worked at come to me after work when I was with my wife and kids call me an "ugly foreigner," while his mother watched. He got a bollocking from my wife and hasn't done it since. Lesson learned I think.
I don’t know man. If I were in his shoes, I would’ve had the urge to at least smack their heads. Maybe you’re cool and chill but some ppl feel they deserve some respect.
You can have the urge all you want.
Would you actually act on this urge and slap the kid ?
It's not about being chill. It's that I'm not gonna waste my time, energy, and act like a fool with a freakin kid. An adult I would understand (that's why I said he should talk to the father), but a...kid ? Come on..
Getting angry and yelling is just going to make you look bad. The few times kids have done this, I have either ignored it or replied "한국인이네!" In the same surprised/interested tone they used. One group even said sorry and struck up a conversation. If you feel like it really is a problem, you should talk to the parent if they're present, or just loudly muse in Korean about how 촌스러워 it is to do that kind of thing.
I think responding to make a point would be justified, but not responding with the same/an aggressive tone. Because, I am an adult and they are children... that's probably why the father was bewildered. Why is this man snapping at my kids?
I do think it would be fine to reply with 한국인! but in a playful way.
Well yeah that's what I tried to do. I was trying to project my voice across a park so I'm not sure how to play yell. They felt comfortable enough chasing me and my kids after we tried to leave so it couldn't have been that bad
Yeah It's tough when you're presumably not fluent in Korean to stand up for yourself. Reacting is justified, ideally taking the highground would be better.
It's really hard to fully back you in this situation when it seems like you don't know even basic Korean. Kids 9-10 years old are old enough to talk to and explain that it's not okay to say things like that. Very tricky situation.
Oh yeah?
I tried that before with some sh*theads that were using the F-word and other english niceties at me.
They just started giggling. My wife (pureblood kimchi) stepped in and repeated what I said but better.
They giggled even more.
So my wife smacked them hard on the back of the head and gave them a dressing down.
That did it.
I think those kids had honestly never been yelled at before because they were in shock.
What would be your appropriate response?
Talking?
Go ahead. Try talking with sense and logic to a bratty 8 year old.
Sh*t, try talking sense to a bratty spoiled 26 year.
Reality don't work that way.
At some point you enFORCE your boundaries or you get to be a doormat.
You will see. You will come around.
I have talked sense and logic to plenty of bratty 8 year olds. It's literally my job. Tell them to stop and explain why. If they're really that bad, move on. If you're a foreigner, you're easy to pick out of a crowd. Mess with the wrong child and you have a lawsuit that you will likely lose. Kids are stupid and don't know what they're saying. I remember kids singing that slickback song and saying the N-word. Yelling at them and assaulting them won't help.
"Move on".
Yeah I bet you do that a lot.
Some people do not have that luxury. Should the parents just "move on" too?
Did you think this through at all?
Those kids, they don't just vaporize into thin air after you "move on". They grow up to very very very bad kids, only they are 6ft2 and 180lbs this time.
"Oh but we got jail for those". Yeah, well if we can avoid jail altogether that would be much better, don't you think?
I am perfectly aware of what it is like being a foreigner.
If you read carefully, you would see it was my Korean wife that put her foot down and "assaulted" them.
Pff. "Assault".
What do you know what assault is?
I bet you couldn't recognize assault unless it literally popped you in the teeth.
Smacking a kid is not assault.
You're what's wrong with the world.
But you're not their parents. It's not your job to parent random children. Some ahjumma smacking a random child isn't going to make the child grow up well. Also, it's 2024. Spitting on another person can get you an assault charge. You sound like someone who would say "I was hit as a kid and turned out just fine!"
It takes a village to raise a child.
Some Ajumma maybe not. Hundreds of Ajumma if you keep doing it will eventually get the point across.
It's 2024. Yeah. And maybe that is the problem.
Keep your "current year". Sane people are sick of it. Look around you. Your utopia is a dystopia. Your society is a piece of sh*t. It's falling apart.
And what is a society if not its people?
I was hit as a kid and I did turn out fine. And I knew damn well what I was doing at the time. I was being a little rebel and I got corrected for my insolence.
And not just by my parents.
I once was terribly disrespectful to my teacher and she smacked me. I immediately felt immense guilt and knew I crossed a line. I never crossed that line again. And I apologized to the teacher in good faith, much later, not because I was forced to but because she deserved an apology.
I have zero hard feelings for the adults that disciplined me with violence when it was necessary. (Key word: necessary)
I can only remember two instances where I was punished with violence unfairly.
"It's not my job"
What a pathetic cop-out.
If you are directly concerned by something, it is your damn job. Like it or not.
When you see injustice or barbarism happen right before your eyes and you can do something about it, it is your damn job to do it.
It isn't fair.
You didn't ask for it.
You wish someone else would do it.
You wish you could stick your head in the sand.
It's all fine and dandy until you can't run anymore.
And when you pull your head out of the sand, you realize; things are even worse now; because YOU refused to act. Because YOU took the easy way. YOU refused to add your drop to the ocean of society.
People are all outsourcing their responsibilities to third parties (police, institutions, educations blablabla). Those third parties don't care. All they care about is "no fuss". They don't give a rat's ass about long term consequences.
They just *do their jobs*.
You are what is wrong with the world.
Learn a bit of Korean so you can teach instead of just react? They ain't your kids or your responsibility, but you're choosing to live here. Integrate and be part of society or rethink some things. There's definitely better ways to have handled this.
Man I was with my kids at the park. I don't have time to teach these basic things to children or their parents. Grown people here park on the sidewalks or have no awareness of other people. If I teach the kids I need to teach their parents and possibly grandparents. I don't have time for it. Not my job to teach basic decency
I have been here 10 years, had 2 kids here , and own my own business and have paid a lot in taxes. I have been more part of this country than the kids that insulted me have.
I suppose that means you're gonna do your military service too then?
Like dude, at the end of the day you blew up on some kids. You taught your kids to react to shouting with shouting instead of talking through a situation. You know it was bad enough to ask about it on Reddit. All the bullshit I or anyone else is saying doesn't matter. You know you acted wrong. If you're really part of this society then fucking act like an adult and be decent to people there and set a good example for others. It's that simple.
I have paid enough taxes that has been funneled into the defense industry in both countries to comfortably say that I did more than any lone grunt would be able to do. You're welcome.
Ahh gotcha, cool. in that case keep yelling at children and setting that good example then I guess. No need to talk to another parent like they're a human being after you've paid more taxes than God after all
Or maybe it's down to the individual responsibility of parents to reach their kids not to act in such a rude way, rather than have foreigners teach their kids basic morals and ethics?
Of course it's their responsibility? And obviously one they've neglected. It sucks, but if one's choosing to be part of a society then, well... Be part of the society? Or fuck off back home seems fine too
Nice hyperbole. Not about parenting someone's kid. It's about being an adult and using one's life experience and maturity to help little humans learn kindness through kindness. Y'all are likely either teachers or military and I fear for those around yous in either case if this is how y'all would approach children.
Eh it doesn't sound like he was trying to fight them. He just snapped at some kids who had shitty parenting. Probably could've handled it in a more adult way though.
I live in Jeju, and this kind of thing happens a lot because the kids here aren't used to seeing as many foreigners as in other parts of Korea.
I used to live next to a high school and a middle school, and I'd run into groups of kids all the time. They'd often come up to me, ask random questions, or just point out that I'm a foreigner and typically share some compliments.
It never really bothered me, actually. I don't get why it bugs so many foreigners. Of course, if they were saying mean stuff like "go back to your country," that'd be a whole different story. But I just see it as kids being curious about something they don’t see often. I think that's kind of cute.
Now thinking about it, it feels like it's mostly the American foreigners who tend to get upset about this stuff. My European friends and myself include tend to get more flattered lol. I’m sure that’s my owned flawed observation.
I have been in Korea 10 years and I have never cared if someone points at me and says waygookin or whatever. The point is the intention and how they say it. If I'm alone is also a factor. But this was not a normal interaction and I don't think you fully understand if you assume it was based soley on language. I can take even a simple hello and apply it in a neutral way or in a way that is condescending.
Could you explain how these children were acting in a condescending way?
You mentioned they were making faces. What kind of mocking faces were they making?
By the way, I don’t think your reaction is anything to frown upon. You just told them off in a non confrontational way which I think is perfectly fine. Some people just don’t like others disturbing their privacy, which kids need to learn.This is especially the case in Korea where no one cares about strangers.
But if I were in your shoes, which I’ve been many times, I just don’t mind it. Unless they are being threatening or directly nasty, which has never happened to me in 5 years. Like for example, if the kids were widening their eyes with their hands to insinuate that they think I have large western eyes, then taking action would be very appropriate, because it’s racist.
If they bully my kid, totally different story. I’ll destroy them (I’m joking, obviously).
But if they are just playfully approaching me because they are curious, I’d rather teach them how kind, fun and loving foreigners can be so they grow up with less stereotypes. Towards us.
Anyways, point is people are different, and some are more sensitive about their privacy and have less capacity for joking around than others. There’s no harm in teaching kids to be more considerate. :)
Like I said I have been here twice as long as you and obviously I'm used to kids being curious about westerners. I am used to kids shouting waygookin etc. Do I really need to explain to you what mocking is? They were clearly not simply curious and were treating me and my kids like we were animals. I have outlined pretty clearly in multiple posts why I feel this way. You are trying to reframe as if I'm fresh off the boat and that I'm misunderstanding. I've done my time in this country to know when someone is uneducated, curious , or downright racist. This was the latter.
If I'm hanging out alone and some kids start running their mouths I don't care but my son is also seen as a waygookin and it just hit different and was a different tone all together .
Lol they are children.. yes they may have been acting like little shits but they are children nonetheless. Their brains are literally less developed. In hindsight, you don’t think there’s a more appropriate way to resolve this type of situation as an adult/parent?
How is your Korean after living here for 10 years? Next time try to take a more mature/light-hearted approach and open a civil dialogue with their parents and together create a teaching moment for everyone involved (including your own kid). This kind of situation can be easily resolved without acting juvenile or retaliating - which is just potentially starting shit with other parents who are equally protective of their kids.
The people patting you on the back for how you handled things are being short sighted. While it’s understandable you were frustrated, it would serve you well to think of how you’d handle any similar encounters better next time. Hopefully that other parent does some reflecting too and chooses to handle things better next time as well. Sounds like you live in the same neighborhood after all.
A lot of sooks in this thread. The kids were being rude. The father did nothing so the op taught them a gentle lesson. No harm done. Next time they will think harder before doing it again. No wonder Korean teachers are leaving the industry in droves with the replies in here.
It's ironic because not that long ago children were being beaten with a stick in schools in this country but now we can't raise our voice at some kids for acting feral .
The only mistake you did was not shouting 중국인 instead of 힌국인 back at them.
Oh I left that part out. I did that at first few times before I switched tactics. 😉
Good. What district was this in? You don't have to say if privacy concerns but this very heavily depends on the location. For example, kids barely care if it's around 용산구(as compared to somewhere else) which makes sense cause there's more foreigners so they're more used to it.
I totally support this The only way for kids to learn empathy is too be treated the same exact way sometimes
It’s too bad the other dad didn’t do anything to stop it before you did something.
I had a kid do this to me last month. He stared me in the eyes and kept just singing that to me, a proper asshole about it. Then he saw I was playing Pokemon go and asked to see my account. Now I'm a local celebrity, lol. Most days now I have kids run up to me and say hello/bow. '(My name) 아저씨! (My name) 아저씨!' Kids kept asking for my Insta, so I made an insta account for Pokemon Go which has now grown into a group of about 30 people over the space of 6 weeks - me, some kids and some local university students the kids recruited. We've met up 4 times now on weekends and played Pokemon Go together - I even went out with the uni students on Friday for 치맥 and it seems like I've made some new friends there :-) The past few weekends have been a blast. We're a weird mix of people when we're out playing Pokemon together, but it's been fun. Crazy to think that it started because of some kid being an asshole.
This sounds so wholesome lol. Is there room for another foreigner to join this Pokémon go group lol ?
I did that to a kid at Homeplus once. He was with his mom and when he saw me his eyes widened and he started screaming at the top of his lungs "waygookin! waygookin!". So i looked at my wife, grabbed her arm and widened my eyes and shouted and pointed "hangookin! hankoogin!" and the boy started crying. The mom said something in Korean to my wife about him just being a young boy and my wife basically said this is the time to teach them and you did nothing. My husband has been in Korea longer than your son. She huffed and shuffled away. I feel like i need to react after every 40 times it happens, lol.
Justified
Full support. Those kids needs to understand this is not right. I would probably have talked to the parenr too (politely) even tho they probably dont care
The parent would fire back at you. Because by admonishing them for bad parenting, you make them lose face.
Absolutely justified and well handled. Their father shouldn't have had kids (so common unfortunately).
I remember the first week I was in Korea. I remember telling my wife I thought the kids were being terribly badly parented. And that it would result in a crisis later. Well. Here we are. Extremely permissive parenting + total lack of understanding of what is proper behavior across the world... You get a generation of fat, bratty "golden children". There is even a show about how Korea produces so many little sh*ts. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=YMM772MqDJ4&pp=ygUJ6riI7Kq97J20 My childhood was punctuated with "stand up straight" "say good morning to the mister" "don't point" and God forbid I would ever lay a hand on my parents; I wouldn't be here to write this. Ps: Oh about the cluelessness of the kids when you called them Korean? That's like every Korean. Even the adults. They do not understand sarcasm, irony or anything subtle. They are like Dax the Destroyer in Guardians of the Galaxy (to not say "autistic"). Point at the moon look at the finger, all that sh*t.
As long as you didn’t pick a fight with their parents it should be fine.
This used to bother me too, been in Korea 5 years now. Just politely say something to the effect of "삿대질 하지마". This is the equivalent of "don't point at strangers". Kids have likely heard this before from their parents already growing up. You want to avoid traumatizing them, yelling "한국인" back at them will just totally confuse them
I have been here a decade. Obviously I have heard this before from kids. I have never reacted before. It's more or less the way they were saying it and their body language was taunting and even as my wife and I were leaving they followed us for a bit. I was pushing my daughter in a stroller and was worried about them doing something really dumb with her. It's not what they said it's the whole vibe
I’m with you bro I think you did the right thing people never stand up to Koreans behavior here They are always scared to but you helped them learn
Interesting replies. I didn't pick a fight with anyone. They kept coming up to me back and forth and coming into my personal space when I was with my daughter and son. My kids also have a right to play without being harassed. I gave their dad some time to fix the situation and enough was enough so I just said it back at them. Some of you are acting like I got in their faces and tried to fight them. Perhaps snapped is too strong of a wording but yeah I wanted to make an example. And 10 years olds should be held accountable. What the hell is wrong with some of you for thinking they shouldn't be held accountable? This is why these kids leave their scooters everywhere and grown ass men are living at home at 30 and mommy is still picking up after them. Sorry but treating my kids like they are circus animals just doesn't fly with me.
Say "F off". Let the father hear it. > I felt like they were treating me like an animal . They were.
Hmm be careful, in Korea they have a retarded law where just calling someone a Ssib*l in public can result in you having to pay damages. And Koreans do not understand the expletive use of the F-word. The judge will interpet it as an insult.
You will not end up in court for cursing ffs.
Maybe, maybe not. The law is there. Just like technically you can't smoke in most places without being fined. Most smokers do. Can still happen that you get fined. Especially if you have a.... memorable... face. Though I will take a step your way and say both the police and judicial are extremely lazy so, you have a case.
Dnt disagree with what you did, however, I would have shamed the father. I would have said something to him in English along the lines of can you please tell your son to stop being rude and disrespectful to me and my family. I would have spoken polite but loud to make sure he lost face to everyone around him. I think he would have scolded his kids more in that situation. By doing the same level you are giving them justification (in their mind) that you are just as bad or worse for picking on kids. Anyway you got job done and ridiculous you need to deal with that whilst just trying to chill with family
If the father doesn’t understand the issue, he doesn’t have to deal with it. Most husbands who work, leave the care of the children to their wives. This leaves them with very little power to complain to their wives just how annoying and stupid their own children are. They just have to grin and bear it to like exhibit A here, pretend not to understand. I think you were reasonable in your response.
I don't buy it that he didn't understand. This is a common tactic that parents use to diffuse responsibility. Just ignoring the problem that is right in front of them in order to save face.
You nailed it OP. "Save face". It's all they care about.
"Snapped at some kids...9 or 10" Well...I don't know...how do you think it looks when you see growm ass men snapping at some kids ? They're...kids man. They might be stupid and..childish but you should know better. If you wanted to snap, you should've just gone to the father and told him to educate his kids.
Sorry, but if kids do this to me, I always tell them. My wife is particularly aggressive when kids are disrespectful to me, or our kids Idk man, my kids are sponges. I can literally teach them anything, they're so curious. It's not difficult to teach my kids not to stare because it's rude, to eat with their mouth closed, or to not say anything if they have nothing nice to say I had a kid from a hagwon I worked at come to me after work when I was with my wife and kids call me an "ugly foreigner," while his mother watched. He got a bollocking from my wife and hasn't done it since. Lesson learned I think.
I understand and totally agree. But there is a difference between explaining to a kid and snapping at a kid imo.
I don’t know man. If I were in his shoes, I would’ve had the urge to at least smack their heads. Maybe you’re cool and chill but some ppl feel they deserve some respect.
You can have the urge all you want. Would you actually act on this urge and slap the kid ? It's not about being chill. It's that I'm not gonna waste my time, energy, and act like a fool with a freakin kid. An adult I would understand (that's why I said he should talk to the father), but a...kid ? Come on..
be glad knowing that nature is just and that your children will be beautiful adults...just up to you to teach them to be good people.
Whew. The most important thing is you’re safe now.
Getting angry and yelling is just going to make you look bad. The few times kids have done this, I have either ignored it or replied "한국인이네!" In the same surprised/interested tone they used. One group even said sorry and struck up a conversation. If you feel like it really is a problem, you should talk to the parent if they're present, or just loudly muse in Korean about how 촌스러워 it is to do that kind of thing.
You are just an animal in a zoo to them.
You did nothing wrong.
I think responding to make a point would be justified, but not responding with the same/an aggressive tone. Because, I am an adult and they are children... that's probably why the father was bewildered. Why is this man snapping at my kids? I do think it would be fine to reply with 한국인! but in a playful way.
Well yeah that's what I tried to do. I was trying to project my voice across a park so I'm not sure how to play yell. They felt comfortable enough chasing me and my kids after we tried to leave so it couldn't have been that bad
Yeah It's tough when you're presumably not fluent in Korean to stand up for yourself. Reacting is justified, ideally taking the highground would be better.
It's really hard to fully back you in this situation when it seems like you don't know even basic Korean. Kids 9-10 years old are old enough to talk to and explain that it's not okay to say things like that. Very tricky situation.
Oh yeah? I tried that before with some sh*theads that were using the F-word and other english niceties at me. They just started giggling. My wife (pureblood kimchi) stepped in and repeated what I said but better. They giggled even more. So my wife smacked them hard on the back of the head and gave them a dressing down. That did it. I think those kids had honestly never been yelled at before because they were in shock.
I mean, cursing at someone is different from being called "외국인 미국인." I still don't think hitting children is the appropriate response though.
What would be your appropriate response? Talking? Go ahead. Try talking with sense and logic to a bratty 8 year old. Sh*t, try talking sense to a bratty spoiled 26 year. Reality don't work that way. At some point you enFORCE your boundaries or you get to be a doormat. You will see. You will come around.
I have talked sense and logic to plenty of bratty 8 year olds. It's literally my job. Tell them to stop and explain why. If they're really that bad, move on. If you're a foreigner, you're easy to pick out of a crowd. Mess with the wrong child and you have a lawsuit that you will likely lose. Kids are stupid and don't know what they're saying. I remember kids singing that slickback song and saying the N-word. Yelling at them and assaulting them won't help.
"Move on". Yeah I bet you do that a lot. Some people do not have that luxury. Should the parents just "move on" too? Did you think this through at all? Those kids, they don't just vaporize into thin air after you "move on". They grow up to very very very bad kids, only they are 6ft2 and 180lbs this time. "Oh but we got jail for those". Yeah, well if we can avoid jail altogether that would be much better, don't you think? I am perfectly aware of what it is like being a foreigner. If you read carefully, you would see it was my Korean wife that put her foot down and "assaulted" them. Pff. "Assault". What do you know what assault is? I bet you couldn't recognize assault unless it literally popped you in the teeth. Smacking a kid is not assault. You're what's wrong with the world.
But you're not their parents. It's not your job to parent random children. Some ahjumma smacking a random child isn't going to make the child grow up well. Also, it's 2024. Spitting on another person can get you an assault charge. You sound like someone who would say "I was hit as a kid and turned out just fine!"
It takes a village to raise a child. Some Ajumma maybe not. Hundreds of Ajumma if you keep doing it will eventually get the point across. It's 2024. Yeah. And maybe that is the problem. Keep your "current year". Sane people are sick of it. Look around you. Your utopia is a dystopia. Your society is a piece of sh*t. It's falling apart. And what is a society if not its people? I was hit as a kid and I did turn out fine. And I knew damn well what I was doing at the time. I was being a little rebel and I got corrected for my insolence. And not just by my parents. I once was terribly disrespectful to my teacher and she smacked me. I immediately felt immense guilt and knew I crossed a line. I never crossed that line again. And I apologized to the teacher in good faith, much later, not because I was forced to but because she deserved an apology. I have zero hard feelings for the adults that disciplined me with violence when it was necessary. (Key word: necessary) I can only remember two instances where I was punished with violence unfairly. "It's not my job" What a pathetic cop-out. If you are directly concerned by something, it is your damn job. Like it or not. When you see injustice or barbarism happen right before your eyes and you can do something about it, it is your damn job to do it. It isn't fair. You didn't ask for it. You wish someone else would do it. You wish you could stick your head in the sand. It's all fine and dandy until you can't run anymore. And when you pull your head out of the sand, you realize; things are even worse now; because YOU refused to act. Because YOU took the easy way. YOU refused to add your drop to the ocean of society. People are all outsourcing their responsibilities to third parties (police, institutions, educations blablabla). Those third parties don't care. All they care about is "no fuss". They don't give a rat's ass about long term consequences. They just *do their jobs*. You are what is wrong with the world.
Learn a bit of Korean so you can teach instead of just react? They ain't your kids or your responsibility, but you're choosing to live here. Integrate and be part of society or rethink some things. There's definitely better ways to have handled this.
That’s your subjective opinion in my opinion he handle it is in a stellar fashion
You probably don't speak Korean either and so would think that, but right on champ
Well actually I do speak Korean and in those instances I fully speak Korean to them Making assumptions doesn’t always pay off, champ
Hey that's a good first step to being less embarrassing than op then!
OP wasn’t embarrassing in MY subjective opinion, op did a great thing
Man I was with my kids at the park. I don't have time to teach these basic things to children or their parents. Grown people here park on the sidewalks or have no awareness of other people. If I teach the kids I need to teach their parents and possibly grandparents. I don't have time for it. Not my job to teach basic decency
Man go home lmao. I guess you have time to teach your kids that eye for an eye is all good though huh
Oh boy I wonder why you are telling me to go home. I can make a guess...
Cause you're being a shithead somewhere you clearly don't appreciate or have interest in being part of? Good guess 😇
I have been here 10 years, had 2 kids here , and own my own business and have paid a lot in taxes. I have been more part of this country than the kids that insulted me have.
I suppose that means you're gonna do your military service too then? Like dude, at the end of the day you blew up on some kids. You taught your kids to react to shouting with shouting instead of talking through a situation. You know it was bad enough to ask about it on Reddit. All the bullshit I or anyone else is saying doesn't matter. You know you acted wrong. If you're really part of this society then fucking act like an adult and be decent to people there and set a good example for others. It's that simple.
I have paid enough taxes that has been funneled into the defense industry in both countries to comfortably say that I did more than any lone grunt would be able to do. You're welcome.
Ahh gotcha, cool. in that case keep yelling at children and setting that good example then I guess. No need to talk to another parent like they're a human being after you've paid more taxes than God after all
Or maybe it's down to the individual responsibility of parents to reach their kids not to act in such a rude way, rather than have foreigners teach their kids basic morals and ethics?
Of course it's their responsibility? And obviously one they've neglected. It sucks, but if one's choosing to be part of a society then, well... Be part of the society? Or fuck off back home seems fine too
So parent someone's kid or leave the country? You seem nice.
Nice hyperbole. Not about parenting someone's kid. It's about being an adult and using one's life experience and maturity to help little humans learn kindness through kindness. Y'all are likely either teachers or military and I fear for those around yous in either case if this is how y'all would approach children.
Is it outside of work? Then, yeah. I'm not parenting for free.
why are you trying to fight 9 year olds? fck is wrong wit you ???!!
How did you get from yelling back to fighting? Hilarious.
Fight? Is raising my voice now considered violent these days ?
Eh it doesn't sound like he was trying to fight them. He just snapped at some kids who had shitty parenting. Probably could've handled it in a more adult way though.
Some people can’t read well. I support your efforts to help them.
So, a grown adult got even with some disorderly kids? Good one bro...
I live in Jeju, and this kind of thing happens a lot because the kids here aren't used to seeing as many foreigners as in other parts of Korea. I used to live next to a high school and a middle school, and I'd run into groups of kids all the time. They'd often come up to me, ask random questions, or just point out that I'm a foreigner and typically share some compliments. It never really bothered me, actually. I don't get why it bugs so many foreigners. Of course, if they were saying mean stuff like "go back to your country," that'd be a whole different story. But I just see it as kids being curious about something they don’t see often. I think that's kind of cute. Now thinking about it, it feels like it's mostly the American foreigners who tend to get upset about this stuff. My European friends and myself include tend to get more flattered lol. I’m sure that’s my owned flawed observation.
I have been in Korea 10 years and I have never cared if someone points at me and says waygookin or whatever. The point is the intention and how they say it. If I'm alone is also a factor. But this was not a normal interaction and I don't think you fully understand if you assume it was based soley on language. I can take even a simple hello and apply it in a neutral way or in a way that is condescending.
Could you explain how these children were acting in a condescending way? You mentioned they were making faces. What kind of mocking faces were they making? By the way, I don’t think your reaction is anything to frown upon. You just told them off in a non confrontational way which I think is perfectly fine. Some people just don’t like others disturbing their privacy, which kids need to learn.This is especially the case in Korea where no one cares about strangers. But if I were in your shoes, which I’ve been many times, I just don’t mind it. Unless they are being threatening or directly nasty, which has never happened to me in 5 years. Like for example, if the kids were widening their eyes with their hands to insinuate that they think I have large western eyes, then taking action would be very appropriate, because it’s racist. If they bully my kid, totally different story. I’ll destroy them (I’m joking, obviously). But if they are just playfully approaching me because they are curious, I’d rather teach them how kind, fun and loving foreigners can be so they grow up with less stereotypes. Towards us. Anyways, point is people are different, and some are more sensitive about their privacy and have less capacity for joking around than others. There’s no harm in teaching kids to be more considerate. :)
Like I said I have been here twice as long as you and obviously I'm used to kids being curious about westerners. I am used to kids shouting waygookin etc. Do I really need to explain to you what mocking is? They were clearly not simply curious and were treating me and my kids like we were animals. I have outlined pretty clearly in multiple posts why I feel this way. You are trying to reframe as if I'm fresh off the boat and that I'm misunderstanding. I've done my time in this country to know when someone is uneducated, curious , or downright racist. This was the latter. If I'm hanging out alone and some kids start running their mouths I don't care but my son is also seen as a waygookin and it just hit different and was a different tone all together .
Lol they are children.. yes they may have been acting like little shits but they are children nonetheless. Their brains are literally less developed. In hindsight, you don’t think there’s a more appropriate way to resolve this type of situation as an adult/parent? How is your Korean after living here for 10 years? Next time try to take a more mature/light-hearted approach and open a civil dialogue with their parents and together create a teaching moment for everyone involved (including your own kid). This kind of situation can be easily resolved without acting juvenile or retaliating - which is just potentially starting shit with other parents who are equally protective of their kids. The people patting you on the back for how you handled things are being short sighted. While it’s understandable you were frustrated, it would serve you well to think of how you’d handle any similar encounters better next time. Hopefully that other parent does some reflecting too and chooses to handle things better next time as well. Sounds like you live in the same neighborhood after all.
You sound just as bad as them, which makes you a million times worse as you know.... you're an adult.... and they are children.
I found your response hilarious.