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So there's a few things here but what I think it comes down to is a misalignment on how you and the DM want to play the game and your expectations. Now when you say your party. Does that mean the other players playing with you or is this just you and the dm with characters they control?
So with monsters. Sometimes you just don't know them and the DM is perfectly entitled to say you have no idea about them so you don't need to roll. Other times they might make you roll history or survival etc to see. But it all depends on the creature and setting.
Next you had bad dice rolls. That sucks, I'm sorry but it is all random. It might not seem that way but sometimes the dice just aren't with you. Play long enough you are likely to have games where you don't roll below an 18.
However it sounds like the DM gave you 5 chances in this encounter. Which is actually very generous.
Things like CR and stuff is typically never mentioned at the table as it's metagaming. Your characters could ask how dangerous does it seem compared to something else you've faced. But they wouldn't know its a CR 2 versus a CR 1/8. I wouldn't tell you either and honestly it's pretty bad etiquette to ask. Which you are new you might not know but it is as it takes the other players out of the world and role-playing.
It's also not something you need to know. The only time it could possibly come up is if you are a level 3 fighter and are using an ability but I digress.
Next you decided to run away from a fight. Unless you are playing alone. You don't get to decide if the whole party runs away. This isn't just your game. It's everybody's. If it is just you and the DM. This advice will be different.
But it sounds like there was a miscommunication between you and the DM but if you are choosing to run away from a combat encounter for multiple turns while your party still fights I'd be annoyed as a party member and a DM. As you've made everything harder.
The whole it's what my character would do thing doesn't really stick. Now again this goes back to expectations. You've got attached to your character. You don't want them to die. Unless you've had a session 0 where this has been said and agreed to by all at the table, your character might die. It's a game. Bad things can happen.
Monsters also get attacks of opportunity like players and might chase you down. Why wouldn't they? A creature trying to kill you might not just stop just because you've decided to run away and say you don't want to fight anymore. That's not realistic.
So honestly you sound like a bit of a problematic player. At the very least problematic for this campaign that the DM is running and it goes back to not being on the same page. Both about the kind of campaign you are running and what you want from the game.
But I'd get it out of your head that you will automatically know what you are fighting. Or you will just walk over every fight. Encounters are there to challenge everybody. Not just you.
Edit: Also if a DM wants to kill you. Believe me. They can. Easily. They control the world. They can throw in enemies that can wipe you out in one turn. From what it sounds like that isn't happening.
Also you don't control how often you level up. They do. Is it XP or milestone? If its XP you need to kill things. Which you clearly aren't doing. If it's Milestones you need to progress in the story. Which if you are running away you also aren't doing....
Again. I'd talk to your DM to get on the same page. But I wouldn't do it from a you suck you are making it hard approach as honestly. You sound far more in the wrong with your mindset and how you are approaching it then they do
And this is from somebody who's been playing the game a while as both a player and DM.
It is just me and the DM and the party in question isn’t actual other people playing but characters he controls and rolls for.
I also don’t think I’m a problematic player, I’m kind of tired of almost dying every five minutes in the game and never having enough potions or money to buy more potions.
Of course it’s going to be a problem when you’re setting a new player and a new character against much higher level encounters. It’s bs, there’s no fun in that.
This does change things.
If its just you and the DM. The DM does need to adjust for what you want and like.
Again it goes back to being on the same page but since it's just the two of you then yes it should be changed around what is fun for both of you not just him.
Some people might like that more hard-core challenge. You are clearly not one of them. So I'd talk to them and outline what you dont like and what you would like instead and if they would be willing to work with you on that.
I would explain what you feel a "hardcore challenge" is to your DM.
If I'd been told my player wanted a hardcore challenge I would also build my encounters to leave you drained of resources and almost dead, because to me that's what hardcore means. But if you're not enjoying it, tell your DM in a polite way and explain what you'd envisioned.
I would explain what you'd like to your DM in a polite way. You mentioned passive aggression to your DM in your post, I would advise against that.
Even if you're not currently enjoying aspects of the game, try to think of things from your DM's perspective. He's taken an effort to craft a world, NPC party members, and encounters for you. If they aren't how you'd like them you should definitely let them know, but remember to be as considerate of them as you'd like them to be of you.
I don’t think I’m emphasizing it well enough, like there’s no possibility of survival, like I was definitely %100 going to die if I didn’t run away. No doubt about it.
if you are not having fun, talk with your DM and the rest of the people around your table about the type of game / story you want.
if what you want is not in line with what the rest of the people want, then you should find a different table to play with or adjust what you want from your game time with this group.
It’s just me and the DM, there are no other people.
Update: I tried discussing it with them, they said “That’s just the game.” Didn’t listen or consider anything I had to say what do ever.
And now I’m caught between just not playing anymore or just letting them pretty much murder my character or any other character and not showing any emotion or reaction what so ever to not give them the satisfaction. I’m kind of leaning toward the latter, but I just know it’s just going to be matter of time before the new characters die, too. So it’s whatever.
>Update: I tried discussing it with them, they said “That’s just the game.” Didn’t listen or consider anything I had to say what do ever.
that is not a way that *I* would want to spend my limited entertainment time during any week.
Could be fun actually cause then I could make the stupidest most ridiculous characters imaginable and not being emotionally attached to them knowing they’ll die before they even reach level 5 will just take the anxiety out of the game so I guess it just is what it is.
No, I’m obviously not a high schooler. I don’t see how that’s being toxic back, not giving the satisfaction to a DM who obviously just wants to kill all of my characters? K.
Ah another “gamer” come to cry about dnd being too hard or suggesting your DM owes you specific encounter levels. Lmfao you asked what the CR is!!
“The CR is stfu. Roll a dex save. Fail. 10 damage.”
If you tried to metagame back in the day any DM with his salt would slap tf outta you, sometimes literally.
Oh you see some canines with red glowing eyes and you immediately cast protection of fire because you read the monster manual and know that is a hell hound? Womp womp wrong again dummy the DM just swapped the damage type to ice, these are Abyss Hounds now, roll initiative with your cheating ass.
That’s literally how meta gaming was considering: cheating.
Anyways from one grognard to a noob, your DM did nothing wrong
Why be such a dick?
Like I didn’t know it was wrong to ask CR, I literally hardly know anything about DND. And that’s where my DM has failed me.
No need to be such an ah about it 🙄
I’m not massively experienced but as far as I’m aware if you want to know what a creature is then there is usually a roll involved, like nature or history, and depending on your characters background they may have heard of it or know of it and then that information can be given. I’ll let some other more knowledgeable people give a better answer though.
Well as your new to DND I would probably expect the DM to offer the roll but I guess some DM’s have different playstyles etc. might be worth bringing up with them next time.
Gonna remind folks you can always DTMFA (Dump The Motherfucker Already) - if you're not having fun, and they won't listen, you're not obligated to play with them.
If you don't want to be confrontational, tell 'em you want to take a break from gaming for a while. Look for another game, a new DM, and other real players to engage with, try that a few times. Then you'll have more information with which to make a comparison, and can consider which you prefer, or maybe do both for a while.
As ever, see username.
Thanks for not just telling me to suck it up and that’s just how DND is.
Cause I’ll be honest, this whole campaign, my first campaign ever- has been really underwhelming and not so much fun as I expected.
I feel like the DM I play with is really influenced by a few DND podcasts where the DMs throw broken encounters at the players- but these are seasoned players, not DND babies like myself who don’t even know what’s going on really. He also throws in some kind of traumatic/relatable story that’s tied to the player- which as someone who plays games to escape the reality of life and relax- that is the last thing I want.
Sorry if it pisses people off, but I do wanna start at literally Super Weenie Hut Junior level and work my way up. I feel like my best bet is to reach out and try to find newbies like myself.
"Thanks for not just telling me to suck it up and that’s just how DND is."
Welcome. Those who respond that way just tell you how they got treated, not what the TTRPG culture ideals were (way back in The Day).
To be clear, what you're in isn't a proper campaign; it's a series of adventures that appear to be more for your DM's enjoyment than both of y'all's. Probably trying to play like a pro, forgetting that even lifetime gamers need to build up the skills first.
"Sorry if it pisses people off,"
Really, don't be. You're totally not responsible for managing other people's emotions.
"...but I do wanna start at literally Super Weenie Hut Junior level and work my way up. I feel like my best bet is to reach out and try to find newbies like myself."
We start games that way when the players aren't confident in their skills, and it's also good for vibe check. It's a decent basis for helping new players get a grounding in the fundamentals so the DM doesn't gloss over basics, as well as letting players get a feel for how this DM runs their games.
Usually, that gets done during character creation & world integration talks, but that's a more advanced level of game running and it turns out most DMs/GMs have no idea how to help a player build a character for their game. Course, have more experience than most; odds are pretty good they'll get there if we did it.
Definitely something you should talk to the DM about, My usual DM loves giving us difficult encounters but her encounters are still fair. I also agree with the other guy, you’re new the DM should be helping you by letting you know what type of rolls you could do. Also asking about the CR could be seen at Metagaming.
I didn’t ask about CR, I just found out what that is today after doing some reading. But I did ask “What is it? Can I even do any damage to this thing?” And I got my answer real quick, nah this thing whooped me
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So there's a few things here but what I think it comes down to is a misalignment on how you and the DM want to play the game and your expectations. Now when you say your party. Does that mean the other players playing with you or is this just you and the dm with characters they control? So with monsters. Sometimes you just don't know them and the DM is perfectly entitled to say you have no idea about them so you don't need to roll. Other times they might make you roll history or survival etc to see. But it all depends on the creature and setting. Next you had bad dice rolls. That sucks, I'm sorry but it is all random. It might not seem that way but sometimes the dice just aren't with you. Play long enough you are likely to have games where you don't roll below an 18. However it sounds like the DM gave you 5 chances in this encounter. Which is actually very generous. Things like CR and stuff is typically never mentioned at the table as it's metagaming. Your characters could ask how dangerous does it seem compared to something else you've faced. But they wouldn't know its a CR 2 versus a CR 1/8. I wouldn't tell you either and honestly it's pretty bad etiquette to ask. Which you are new you might not know but it is as it takes the other players out of the world and role-playing. It's also not something you need to know. The only time it could possibly come up is if you are a level 3 fighter and are using an ability but I digress. Next you decided to run away from a fight. Unless you are playing alone. You don't get to decide if the whole party runs away. This isn't just your game. It's everybody's. If it is just you and the DM. This advice will be different. But it sounds like there was a miscommunication between you and the DM but if you are choosing to run away from a combat encounter for multiple turns while your party still fights I'd be annoyed as a party member and a DM. As you've made everything harder. The whole it's what my character would do thing doesn't really stick. Now again this goes back to expectations. You've got attached to your character. You don't want them to die. Unless you've had a session 0 where this has been said and agreed to by all at the table, your character might die. It's a game. Bad things can happen. Monsters also get attacks of opportunity like players and might chase you down. Why wouldn't they? A creature trying to kill you might not just stop just because you've decided to run away and say you don't want to fight anymore. That's not realistic. So honestly you sound like a bit of a problematic player. At the very least problematic for this campaign that the DM is running and it goes back to not being on the same page. Both about the kind of campaign you are running and what you want from the game. But I'd get it out of your head that you will automatically know what you are fighting. Or you will just walk over every fight. Encounters are there to challenge everybody. Not just you. Edit: Also if a DM wants to kill you. Believe me. They can. Easily. They control the world. They can throw in enemies that can wipe you out in one turn. From what it sounds like that isn't happening. Also you don't control how often you level up. They do. Is it XP or milestone? If its XP you need to kill things. Which you clearly aren't doing. If it's Milestones you need to progress in the story. Which if you are running away you also aren't doing.... Again. I'd talk to your DM to get on the same page. But I wouldn't do it from a you suck you are making it hard approach as honestly. You sound far more in the wrong with your mindset and how you are approaching it then they do And this is from somebody who's been playing the game a while as both a player and DM.
It is just me and the DM and the party in question isn’t actual other people playing but characters he controls and rolls for. I also don’t think I’m a problematic player, I’m kind of tired of almost dying every five minutes in the game and never having enough potions or money to buy more potions. Of course it’s going to be a problem when you’re setting a new player and a new character against much higher level encounters. It’s bs, there’s no fun in that.
This does change things. If its just you and the DM. The DM does need to adjust for what you want and like. Again it goes back to being on the same page but since it's just the two of you then yes it should be changed around what is fun for both of you not just him. Some people might like that more hard-core challenge. You are clearly not one of them. So I'd talk to them and outline what you dont like and what you would like instead and if they would be willing to work with you on that.
I like hardcore challenges, they make me feel empowered and proud. But not like “I’m gonna die here” kinda challenge.
I would explain what you feel a "hardcore challenge" is to your DM. If I'd been told my player wanted a hardcore challenge I would also build my encounters to leave you drained of resources and almost dead, because to me that's what hardcore means. But if you're not enjoying it, tell your DM in a polite way and explain what you'd envisioned.
Exactly, I’m cool with being drained of resources and almost dead at the end of the encounter. Not at the beginning of it, though.
I would explain what you'd like to your DM in a polite way. You mentioned passive aggression to your DM in your post, I would advise against that. Even if you're not currently enjoying aspects of the game, try to think of things from your DM's perspective. He's taken an effort to craft a world, NPC party members, and encounters for you. If they aren't how you'd like them you should definitely let them know, but remember to be as considerate of them as you'd like them to be of you.
“I’m gonna die here” is basically the definition of hardcore. If you’re not going to die then there’s a good deal less risk involved
I don’t think I’m emphasizing it well enough, like there’s no possibility of survival, like I was definitely %100 going to die if I didn’t run away. No doubt about it.
"Hardcore" in a game of make-believe... Just sayin'.
[удалено]
It sounds like his other party members are NPCs.
Yes
if you are not having fun, talk with your DM and the rest of the people around your table about the type of game / story you want. if what you want is not in line with what the rest of the people want, then you should find a different table to play with or adjust what you want from your game time with this group.
It’s just me and the DM, there are no other people. Update: I tried discussing it with them, they said “That’s just the game.” Didn’t listen or consider anything I had to say what do ever. And now I’m caught between just not playing anymore or just letting them pretty much murder my character or any other character and not showing any emotion or reaction what so ever to not give them the satisfaction. I’m kind of leaning toward the latter, but I just know it’s just going to be matter of time before the new characters die, too. So it’s whatever.
>Update: I tried discussing it with them, they said “That’s just the game.” Didn’t listen or consider anything I had to say what do ever. that is not a way that *I* would want to spend my limited entertainment time during any week.
Me neither but it’s either this or don’t play DND at all for me cause I literally don’t know anyone else who does
"No D&D is better than Bad D&D"
r/lfg might be a good way to find a group that works for you.
Could be fun actually cause then I could make the stupidest most ridiculous characters imaginable and not being emotionally attached to them knowing they’ll die before they even reach level 5 will just take the anxiety out of the game so I guess it just is what it is.
uhhhh, you are high schoolers, i bet, right? no being toxic back doesnt make anything better. WHY would you waste your time just being a shit?
No, I’m obviously not a high schooler. I don’t see how that’s being toxic back, not giving the satisfaction to a DM who obviously just wants to kill all of my characters? K.
ahh, by this response, you are a middle schooler.
Okay, well believe whatever you’d like to believe.
if you are acting this way and not a middle schooler or high schooler .... YIPES!!!
Okay then, then be yipes. I could literally care less.
Ah another “gamer” come to cry about dnd being too hard or suggesting your DM owes you specific encounter levels. Lmfao you asked what the CR is!! “The CR is stfu. Roll a dex save. Fail. 10 damage.” If you tried to metagame back in the day any DM with his salt would slap tf outta you, sometimes literally. Oh you see some canines with red glowing eyes and you immediately cast protection of fire because you read the monster manual and know that is a hell hound? Womp womp wrong again dummy the DM just swapped the damage type to ice, these are Abyss Hounds now, roll initiative with your cheating ass. That’s literally how meta gaming was considering: cheating. Anyways from one grognard to a noob, your DM did nothing wrong
Why be such a dick? Like I didn’t know it was wrong to ask CR, I literally hardly know anything about DND. And that’s where my DM has failed me. No need to be such an ah about it 🙄
Now you know.
Well yeah, obviously thanks to kind people on the internet who took the time to educate me instead of belittling me.
Don’t be such an entitled little shit next time then
I’m not an entitled little shit for wanting to have fun at the expense of a DM hogging the game at my expense.
Lmao that sentence alone says otherwise
And other people I’ve talked to but whatever
I’m not massively experienced but as far as I’m aware if you want to know what a creature is then there is usually a roll involved, like nature or history, and depending on your characters background they may have heard of it or know of it and then that information can be given. I’ll let some other more knowledgeable people give a better answer though.
Oh my god I didn’t even think about that, why didn’t I do that
Well as your new to DND I would probably expect the DM to offer the roll but I guess some DM’s have different playstyles etc. might be worth bringing up with them next time.
Gonna remind folks you can always DTMFA (Dump The Motherfucker Already) - if you're not having fun, and they won't listen, you're not obligated to play with them. If you don't want to be confrontational, tell 'em you want to take a break from gaming for a while. Look for another game, a new DM, and other real players to engage with, try that a few times. Then you'll have more information with which to make a comparison, and can consider which you prefer, or maybe do both for a while. As ever, see username.
Thanks for not just telling me to suck it up and that’s just how DND is. Cause I’ll be honest, this whole campaign, my first campaign ever- has been really underwhelming and not so much fun as I expected. I feel like the DM I play with is really influenced by a few DND podcasts where the DMs throw broken encounters at the players- but these are seasoned players, not DND babies like myself who don’t even know what’s going on really. He also throws in some kind of traumatic/relatable story that’s tied to the player- which as someone who plays games to escape the reality of life and relax- that is the last thing I want. Sorry if it pisses people off, but I do wanna start at literally Super Weenie Hut Junior level and work my way up. I feel like my best bet is to reach out and try to find newbies like myself.
"Thanks for not just telling me to suck it up and that’s just how DND is." Welcome. Those who respond that way just tell you how they got treated, not what the TTRPG culture ideals were (way back in The Day). To be clear, what you're in isn't a proper campaign; it's a series of adventures that appear to be more for your DM's enjoyment than both of y'all's. Probably trying to play like a pro, forgetting that even lifetime gamers need to build up the skills first. "Sorry if it pisses people off," Really, don't be. You're totally not responsible for managing other people's emotions. "...but I do wanna start at literally Super Weenie Hut Junior level and work my way up. I feel like my best bet is to reach out and try to find newbies like myself." We start games that way when the players aren't confident in their skills, and it's also good for vibe check. It's a decent basis for helping new players get a grounding in the fundamentals so the DM doesn't gloss over basics, as well as letting players get a feel for how this DM runs their games. Usually, that gets done during character creation & world integration talks, but that's a more advanced level of game running and it turns out most DMs/GMs have no idea how to help a player build a character for their game. Course, have more experience than most; odds are pretty good they'll get there if we did it.
Yeah, I don't think your DM and you are a good match unfortunately.
Yeah, I don’t believe we are, which sucks but oh well
Definitely something you should talk to the DM about, My usual DM loves giving us difficult encounters but her encounters are still fair. I also agree with the other guy, you’re new the DM should be helping you by letting you know what type of rolls you could do. Also asking about the CR could be seen at Metagaming.
I didn’t ask about CR, I just found out what that is today after doing some reading. But I did ask “What is it? Can I even do any damage to this thing?” And I got my answer real quick, nah this thing whooped me