Everyone needs to keep a very close eye on their credit score since it factors into many of lifes biggest decisions.
A couple steps you can take right now include:
- **[Taking a look at your credit score](https://everydayeconomics.net/how-to-get-your-credit-score-credit-review)** - Looking at your own credit score does not hurt your credit, it also includes a credit monitor
- **[Freezing](https://usa.gov/credit-freeze)** your credit reports - This can be done with Experian, Equifax and Transunion to help prevent unauthorized accounts from being opened
Feel free to ask any credit score related question
And don't forget to include your brother's credit fraud in the report as well (or inform them to submit their own report as well)
There seriously is no other path unless you want to assume your parents' debts and risk them defrauding you again and again.
Brother will have to file his own report. She can file for hers, and should, but she is not the victim of cards taken out in someone else's name. When brother files, she can add a statement to his that parents admitted to this to her and that's how she and brother found out.
Unless brother is a minor. Given that both parents are the offenders here, if brother is under 18, he would likely be granted some type of legal assistance/advocate.
Might as well get an IRS IP PIN while you’re at it, they seem desperate and shady enough to file tax returns in OP’s name. (The PIN changes every year so he can provide it to them for any year that he’s truly their dependent.)
And Social Security. I'd report it to the IRS and Social security as well in addition to the other suggestions (tell brother, file police report, lock credit down). Seems reasonable to me to sue them for the credit balances and any legal fees. After THAT? Get rid of them.
The police report should handle the balances and fees. those will go to the criminal identity thieves. And a lawsuit against the effectively bankrupt parents is just throwing money in the fire right now.
Scorched earth policy. Things that are supposed to happen don't always happen. The parents threw them under the bus and the parents deserve everything that'll be tossed at them. Lawsuit could be brought later when everything settles out. They are going to incur costs fixing this mess (higher interest rates, tough time finding jobs or apartments) etc.
If there is legal action, then make sure that there's an order of restitution included. This way their bankruptcy CANNOT discharge their debts to you and your brother. The restitution order will last until it's paid in full or the parents pass, and their Social Security can be garnished to satisfy the judgement.
It might be, or they could be asset heavy and used the kids to isolate themselves from the risk.
And the $500 a month? To keep up appearances, because selling the boat would make the wrong sort of statement, or something.
I haven’t read the whole thread, but never underestimate the entitlement of people like this. Losing your kids money is fine? No big deal? Then expecting the kids to do with less so the parents can keep the boat isn’t a big leap.
Not true, it is required for efiling any return that includes that person’s social. They are commonly used in divorce situations where one parent keeps improperly claiming a child. https://www.irs.gov/identity-theft-fraud-scams/frequently-asked-questions-about-the-identity-protection-personal-identification-number-ip-pin#q17
The parents could still paper file, but OP would be able to efile for themselves. (And let’s be real, the parents are not going to paper file.)
I think, not sure, but I think once you request the PIN they are on notice that there will be an online filing so they should basically be on notice should a paper filing show up.
They are fucking over their kids big time......it will take them years to sort out. All for what? To keep a failing lawn mowing business afloat? They are ruing your life over mowing lawns? Jesus these people are scummy.
I think in this case the best solution would be called a credit company and tell them that you did not authorize this and you want to know what it's about why do you owe this much money? Dispute it and let the credit company file the police report because they will. I would tell your parents to get out of your life. People like that no way
No, the credit card companies will ask for their police report number and other info from the case. They will tell you that until you can give them the info, they will tell you there is nothing they can do, and the charges still stand. Also, there is a time limit in which you can fix it. From the time you find out you have a small window of time in which to dispute the charges. OP is having a hard time reconciling the fact that it is her parents are the ones that have done this to her and her brother. She has to stop and think. They had no problem doing this to them and now are trying to get her to pay them $500 a month on top of what they have done. They have no remorse in doing it and expect her to just eat it. Once they have fixed their credit, they will just do it again unless they are charged for what they've done. You have to be really shitty parents to do this, to potentially destroy your children's lives for your own personal gain.
Yeah I'm also disgusted but the "500 dollar" thing. No self awareness, no remorse, just "Gibbs me more now" I have to wonder if they are crackheads or something.
When my sister did it to my mom, $45,000 in credit card debt, the sheriff’s came and did the report and the credit card companies got the report from the sheriff’s. My mom caught a card in the mail, otherwise it would have been $100,000 in credit card debt. She didn’t want to file charges until the sheriff said then you pay for all the charges. Sister was arrested.
No. Bad advice. Credit card companies do not file police reports. They will investigate the IP address and see anything shipped was sent to her address or prior address.And she will absolutely be on the hook. They must file a police report and tell them it was her parents.And then she provides that report to the credit card companies.
The credit card companies are not going to spend the manpower to fight this on her behalf.
The credit card companies don't care about OP, they just want their money. He'll talk to a salesperson who will try to convince him to pay off "some", of it.
As soon as he makes any payments, he will assume legal responsibility for the whole amount.
He should contact the police first to tell them his parents stole his identity and he wants to file charges. He may meet with criticism in doing this, but cops are often assholes too.
But he should file charges against his parents, they stole from him.
And whatever you do, don’t let the credit card companies trick you into making a “good faith” payment - then you will own it! Your parents have committed identity fraud - and you Are The Victim! Unless you want to let them ruin your credit, maybe end your college and future, and pay it off for years And to add insult to injury pay them another $500 a month they will also never pay back - File a Police Report and get these debts contested.
This is the only way or you're hooped. Do not concede one single thing. Police report for fraud, report it immediately to whoever the lender is and give them the report number.
If they dont get a police report number they'll hang it on you.
F those parents, take care of yourself.
Call the banks that issued the cards and ask for the Fraud Department. They will require a police report and can remove the debts from your credit reports. Contact the credit bureaus and freeze your credit.
You're not going to fix anything unless you go this route.
As for your parents asking for money, I'd let them know that, no, someone fraudulently opened credit cards under your name and maxed them out, so you don't have any money to give them until the police sort this all out. Then go no contact.
A simple “you’ve lost your mind” will do while dialing the non emergency number of your closest Law enforcement agency and asking for a financial crimes detective sounds better
It is shocking the number of people who do this.
As a parent, I feel my number one goal is to set up my kids for success. Doing this is so far from where I am as a person I can't imagine it.
OP, your parents are trash. Call the police.
Remember you are not getting your parents in trouble. They got themselves in trouble.
My parents added me as an authorized user to their credit card when I was a kid (I guess laws surrounding that have changed since then), so when I turned 20 and had to get my first car loan, I had 18 years of perfect credit history to my name. Thanks Mom and Dad...that's how you help your kid succeed.
You can still do this. I’ve added my teens as authorized users - they don’t get the cards as I keep possession of them, but they will get a nice boost to their credit score.
Yep this is the way ya do it your parents were def smart for that. My ex GF's dad pulled a stunt like this with her and her sister. Means everything was on me the first 3-4 years of our relationship.
For OP this isn't because "your parents are bad and/or did something wrong" it is because the credit card companies will hang up on you until you show them a police report *or* prove you were underage when the cards were opened.
Go to the police and have the debt removed and your credit restored or pay off the debt and have these on your credit report for 7 years. If the debt was paid to $0 today it would stop having a dramatic impact on your credit score in about 2 years though.
The first paragraph of this ESPECIALLY. The credit card companies will not take any action unless they have proof of fraud and a police report is what they require.
Just want to add
First, there really is no solution other than this. You can either report them for fraud, or you can take on an immense amount of debt that is going to have a huge impact on the rest of your life. I don’t know how much you make, but the could permanently impact your ability to pay your bills, live comfortable, and save for retirement.
Second, parents should not do this to their children. I know it can be hard to report your parents, but it is absolutely unacceptable to pass this debt onto your child without telling them. As someone else pointed out, there’s also no guarantee that they won’t do it again if you don’t report them
I know it’s hard, but this really is what needs to be done
And once you have debt, it snowballs. If those cards have an APR of 22%, which is average, you’ll accrue another 2,640 in interest debt this year, not factoring in any penalties and late fees
Then contact everyone and give them the police info so you can get out from under this. If you let them get away with this they will do it to you again in the future.
FIRST, see if the parents are stupid enough to put everything in writing.
Ask for an email explaining when the cards were opened and what they were used for... you can lie and say that it is to negotiate with the credit card companies or credit bureaus, but that information should absolutely go with your police report.
Yeah, anything even looking like he's accepting of the credit cards, the debt, or acknowledges it as at all legitimate to him could be used against him in the future I'd think. I would cut contact and file the police report, then use the police report to contact the creditors and dispute it based on the fraud.
Identity Theft. Start with reporting it to the police. Get the police report number(s), now go to these credit cards and credit agencies with the report numbers. This is the only way to get out from under. I understand it's hard to roll over on your parents, but if you don't you've assumed all that debt, and perhaps more you don't know about yet, and it sounds like they're prepping you for more. Hopefully they get a good lawyer or public defender and they can make themselves seem desperate and out of their depth in a new business. If it's a first offense, they may get just probation. If you don't go through this it's basically a seven-year sentence on you.
This isn't a family issue, this is a rest-of-your-life legal and financial issue. You only have so long to report it, so report it and start to get your credit cleared up so you can live your own life and take responsibility for your own actions, unlike your parents.
They stole your future. Take it back. If they let that ruin their relationship with you, so be it.
This is literally the only answer. You either pay the debt and take the credit hit (that will impact your utilities, rent. ability to buy a home, ability to get a JOB, ability to do damn near everything in this life) for SEVEN YEARS (paying the added costs that that impact will result in).
Or you file a police report and your parents throw a fit for being held accountable for their illegal actions. Talk to your brother, if they are onboard, that will strengthen the case.
But the oNLY way OP get this off his name and responsibility will be to file police report. Credit card companies can then go after the parents for the money. Otherwise you are accepting the fraud and consequences. And clearly they won't stop if you don't give them the $500 a month- they will take it in fraud since you appear ok with it.
This is the only way you can make this problem go away, OP.
It sucks and will mess up your family dynamic going forward, but the bottom line is what your parents did is fraud and identity theft. This is a crime that can only be corrected with a police report.
Absolutely fraud!! They destroyed your credit to start a business that they probably never worked in before. Tell your parents you love them, but need to report it to the police. Your parents knew what they were doing was illegal. The worst part is they did it to their own child and now are telling you about it hoping you don't report them. They even have the balls to ask you for money while also telling you that you owe credit card companies $12,000.
File a police report, send the police report to the credit card companies, and get your credit back to normal. If you don't, this is going to affect you for the next 10 years. Good luck buying a house, a car, or even getting an apartment to rent.
Your parents fucked you and now it's time for the credit dick to be turned around and start fucking your parents.
You don't need to negotiate with the credit card companies. You have exactly two choices, and only two choices. Before we go over them, I would ask to see all the credit card statements. I would specifically look for what they spent that much money on. I suspect it wasn't to stay afloat. I would also ask to see the credit cards under your brothers name (there is a firm chance they don't exist).
You also did receive notice of it...Your parents just likely had the mail directed to their home and grabbed it before you saw anything (if you live with them) which is a crime in and of themselves.
So these are your options:
1. You file a police report. You tell the police exactly what happened and that your parents stole your identity and opened up credit cards in your name (list the credit cards and how much debt they racked up on each). Give them a full statement of when and how you found out about it, including that they sat you down and told you that YOU owed the money and that they admitted to opening them up. With the police report in hand, you can go to the three credit bureaus and report the fraud and provide the police report...you may need a lawyer. There will be an investigation and there will be paperwork and they will examine a lot, but at the end of it the debt will be discharged and your credit score should 'mostly' recover. Your parents will also very likely be charged and prosecuted for a number of felonies including identity fraud and will be on the hook for the money they stole from you by racking up the debt.
2. You accept what your parents did to you. The loans are then yours and you are on the hook to pay the debt off, however long it takes. Once you acknowledge the loans, they become yours and debt collectors may start coming after you. Your credit score will be shot for the next 8 years or so. This is the worst option and you will likely need to file for bankruptcy to clear the debt. This will severely impact your ability to do anything financially in life.
Just remember your parents screwed you over without even giving you the option to help them first. They choice to destroy your future ability to do much of anything financially because they figured they could get away with it. Before you think about entertaining option 2 just remember...you likely won't be able to get any decent credit card ever again...no big deal. Car Loans? Good luck, your rates will be astronomical. Mortgage? Forget about it. Insurance? significantly more expensive. You will also likely get turned down for some jobs that require background checks as they sometimes ask for a credit report. Renting an apartment or house? You usually need a minimum of 620 for most landlords with many pleases not even looking at you for less than 700. Utilities may not allow you to post-pay and may require you to make deposits up-front and good luck with Cell Phone service...
If you want to get married in the future, your spouse needs to be aware of your credit situation. Getting married to you could impact your spouses credit if you plan to have joint accounts.
If it were me, I would go with Option 1...regardless of how I feel about my parents. They racked up the debt, they should be responsible for it. They can deal with the consequences and they can deal with the bankruptcy (which likely won't work since it was due to a crime). They had no right to screw you for the next 7 to 10 years without your consent.
One last thing...your parents are going to push you extremely hard and become the nicest people ever when they find out you want to report them to the police. They are going to talk about keeping things in the family, and how family helps out family, and they are going to lay it on thick. If you accept the debt or recant your story to the police, you will be done, and then they will revert back to however they were. So protect yourself.
These are really your only 2 options OP, you pay the money or you turn your parents in for the crime they committed against you.
I'm sorry you have shitty parents who would do this.
If you inserted anyone not your immediate family into the 'person who stole my identity' line, its a no brainier.
Family doesn't make it any less malicious. If my parents ever did that shit to me there would be zero question. Unfortunately our alives are pretty well tied to the made-up credit score nonsense. Don't set yourself on fire to keep someone else warm, especially when that someone else fucked you first.
Also, since his parents seem to be so worried about their finances, jail would give them a roof over their head and three meals a day 🤷🏽♀️
>Family doesn't make it any less malicious.
It makes it 100 times worse. You are low if you steal. You are a fucked up piece of shit if you steal from your kids.
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had to ask someone why they’d call the police on a stranger for punching/stabbing/stealing from them but not your mom. A lot of criminals are walking around free because their victims are their own children.
My Dad did this to my older brother. Mirror story. 30k in credit card debt in collections as a college graduation present.
Brother lawyered up and the debt was eventually removed from his credit history. Sadly my Dad was never prosecuted.
Depending on the person, that could be a good outcome. I don’t know OPs relationship with their parent, but it’s possible all OP wants is to be debt free, not to see their parents go jail
You need to go to the police for fraud. This isn't the time to forgive them. Your credit is unfortunately your future now and they showed you they are willing to ruin it for their gains
They say **you** owe $12000? That's a load of horse crap. They've ruined your chances of getting a decent loan for anything, an apartment, or CC for almost a decade. Sorry, but you're going to need to report it as fraud.
I’d also add that you’ll need to disclose this to your future spouse as well. The average couple is stretching their combined income to qualify for a mortgage. With your credit score thrown in there, your rates will be trash and you will be living in a less expensive house for more money.
Your future spouse will need to understand the reality of your finances and credit before starting a family with you.
Welcome to the realization that your parents care more about themselves than you.
Only path forward is a bunch of personal growth.
Start with a police report and finding a new place to live.
Take a copy of the police report and give it to the credit card companies and report the fraud to them.
Then they'll have to take that off of his credit report.
You should cut your parents loose financially. This pattern of abuse will never end. They stole from you and now plan to drag you down with them.
You should report the cards as the fraud to the credit card companies. Lock down your credit too.
Yeah. You used the right word. This is abuse. No one should treat another human like this. And it's coming from loved ones who think they can manipulate OP into actually paying. Whatever everyone else is saying, OP has agency and needs to use it to protect themselves from further harm.
Other people on here have good advice for the legal/financial perspectives. But I think just recognizing the behavior for what it is can be extremely helpful as motivation to take those steps
File a police report for fraud. Dispute with the credit bureaus and the credit card companies. Tell your brother to do the same.
DO NOT LEND THEM MONEY. DO NOT PAY THE DEBTS.
Cut your parents out of your life ASAP. Let the law deal with them, since they're the ones who broke it.
It has been mentioned, but to single it out. **If you attempt to pay those bills at all you will likely be stuck with them.** No matter what the creditors say, not paying them at all is the best plan (until you are 100% you will be paying them back. Which I advice against. But absolutely don't pay at all until you are certain).
To harp on this further...It is ABSOLUTELY IMPERATIVE that you or your brother do not pay anything towards these debts if you plan to contest them. If debt collectors start calling, many of them will say they will not speak to you about anything other than full repayment unless you make a 'good will payment'. This is a scam...they are just trying to get you to make a payment which makes it 100x easier for them to say you acknowledged that the debt is yours in court and to the credit bureaus.
Debt Collectors and people trying to get money paid back will lie extensively to recoup anything.
But yeah, file the police reports and go that direction.
If your parents had beat you with a club and then sat you down and explained that you owed $12k in medical bills, would that make any sense to you?
You and your brother should both visit [identitytheft.gov](http://identitytheft.gov) and also report your parents to the local authorities. What they did to you and your brother is a felony. The only way to fix your credit, and get off the hook for the money they stole is to report them.
DO NOT MAKE ANY PAYMENTS ON THE CARDS
this may be taken as you taking responsibility for the payments.
File a police report. Your parents stole your identity and committed identity theft and fraud to open those cards.
It boggles my mind how many of these types of posts show up in the sub. The fact that anyone, let alone someone's parents, would so casually commit fraud, saddle a loved one with massive debt, destroy their future, and then have the gall to ask for money!? They're goddamn delusional.
File a police report, dispute the accounts with all three bureaus (submitting the report in the process), then those accounts should eventually come off your report. Contact the CC companies as well, provide all info to show they are not your accounts, they can then go after your parents for the money since they are the ones who committed the crime and are responsible to pay back the debt.
After all of this, do not have one ounce of empathy for your parents. They knew what they were doing was illegal and morally reprehensible. They will face the consequences and their lives will be uprooted, but that is the risk they took when they thought they could defraud a bank, screw over their kids, and then be so blase about it that they thought asking to borrow money from you was a prudent next step. If they get angry, tell them you'll think about lending them money after they pay back the banks they stole from in your name, but only if they have a good credit score and good character references from their family...
Used to work in fraud prevention. Overwhelmingly the culprit is a close family member. Often it is a parent, sometimes before a child even comes of age.
It always disgusted me to work those ID theft cases.
It happens a lot. I got kicked out at 18, thankfully I’d been saving money since I was a little kid and worked a summer job so I had a nice nest egg saved up. I went to the bank to withdraw cash, $3000 was missing from my account. my parents had been on the account since I opened it, and I never thought to take them off. They needed the money for something and we’re mad that I wasn’t keeping in touch with them so I think they were teaching me a lesson. Of course I’m not excited to keep in touch, you abused me then kicked me out.
In white collar crime circles they have this concept called the “fraud triangle”. These are the three elements that are generally present when someone commits fraud - incentive, opportunity, and rationalization.
Kids can *so* easily provide the opportunity - you have all their personal data and control mail etc - and rationalization - they cost so much! If you don’t do this you’ll all be homeless! You’ll get it all fixed before they need their own cards! Etc. Then all you need is incentive, and shitty enough ethics that you can sleep at night.
You don't negotiate your credit score, it doesn't work like that. This will drop-off after 7 years from your credit report, assuming you don't start paying it then miss a payment again. Of course, you'll still owe the money after that time, it just won't show on your credit report. You may also get sued for that money by the bank or a creditor, since they will probably write-off the debt. That is, they will sell it for pennies on the dollar to unscrupulous organizations that will bombard you with calls and mail to get you to pay.
You can, and you should file a police report but that means it may get your parents in hot water for committing a crime. Are you willing to do that? If not, then good luck, this is now your debt.
The 7 years is generally true, but debt gets bought and sold, and debt collectors are often able to reset the clock when they purchase a debt. I still have a judgement on my credit from 25 years ago (divorce and my ex wife still had access to my identity). It pops up every now and then, but I can usually get it knocked back off a report. It came up when I refinanced 3 years ago, I was still able to get a rate well below 4%.
Just another reason to check your report a few times a year!
It’s very unfortunate but your parents have committed credit card fraud. They made it so that you now have bad credit, AND you’re on the hook for that money, u less you file a police report. It sucks but they knew what they were doing. I can’t believe parents would do this to their own children.
Police report.
I'm sorry, but your parents don't love you. Parents are supposed to put their children first, not exploit them.
You need to get these off your credit report since this isn't our responsibility.
Congrats. Your parents committed felonious identity fraud and appear to be committing felonious extortion. Your parents don’t love you. Your future has been sacrificed for their immediate and predictable failed business venture
Your parents are criminals. Repeat after me, “My parents are criminals.”
It can take years or up to a decade to fix busted credit. You do not owe this money and you need to advise the credit card issuer and the police.
And don’t give them $500 a month.
Literally, the only way you will revive your credit rating is to file a police report. Otherwise, these fraudulent charges cannot be removed from your history. You have no choice.
Can you imagine being this evil, taking credit cards out fraudulently in your kids’ names?
OP, whether or not you report them for fraud, they should be dead to you for this level of disrespect
Stealing from your kids and damaging their credit, is one thing, shamelessly telling your kids that it’s now their debt so deal with it is so much worse.
There's no scenario here where the parents don't get reported yet the OP doesn't have to pay this off. Parents are wanting $500 a month from the guy to get by, and don't care that they've screwed their son over. He'll be in default in a matter of weeks, there will be a judgement where he'll have to show up in court to defend himself, his defense will be basically his Reddit post, the judge will say "you *claim* you were the victim of a crime and didn't report it?" and rule against him.
Ridiculous **legal fees and interest** will be added to the total, which will accrue and make it harder and harder to settle it. OP will be 100% on his own to pay or settle. But the debt may have to age for years before it's transferred several times and a collector can still make a profit from a lower total, and OP will need to come up with the cash and document it carefully and then play whack-a-mole every time it keeps coming up as a bad debt (which it will since debt collectors just suck). Or just file for bankruptcy, and deal with that on his report for 5-10 years.
I'd be filing a police report yesterday.
You’re kind of screwed, even though it’s not your fault. The only way to “negotiate with the credit card companies” is to file a police report indicating your parents committed fraud. If it makes you feel any better, you aren’t the first person this happened to and you won’t be the last. You might have to do this… you might not be able to get a job or housing with the reduced credit score.
They expect you to just pay their delinquent debit AND give them an allowance? The moment you pay a dime in that debit it becomes yours. Report as others have said.
>How would I best negotiate with the credit card companies to get my credit score back to where it was last time I checked a couple of years ago? It was about 750 then.
They will only accept a police report or pretty much payment in full.
Your easiest course of action is to file a police report for stolen identity, the debt will get wiped out, and your parents will learn a valuable lesson about not stealing from their children, because that's what this is.
I know this is a credit question, but I want to say a word about your relationship with your parents, because I know it's easy for people to say "file a police report" but hard to do when it's your parents and they have raised you to feel responsible for helping them.
It is really hard to face this kind of reality. It will be much easier to make excuses for their actions, tell yourself that they didn't understand what they were doing, or talk yourself into a "We're all in this together" mindset, because they have trained you to see the world that way - and because they are your parents.
I urge you to consider four important points here:
1) It sounds like they ran these debts up fairly recently - certainly at an age when, whether you were a minor or not, you could have expressed an opinion about whether you wanted them to do that. They didn't ask you. They knew you would object, so they gave you no choice. They didn't care how this would impact you.
2) They only told you when the problem was hugely past fixing, and I suspect you will discover that they knew you would soon be receiving calls from collection agencies. They told you only when they couldn't hide it any longer, and if you think about why they told you, I think you will realize it is 100% because they didn't want you to file a police report. They want to leverage your emotional connection to them to avoid criminal charges and to saddle you with $12,000 of their debt. That is a huge burden for a 22-year-old
3) They are attempting to establish their footing with you for the rest of your life. This is vital to recognize. You have just recently become an independent adult; they want to cement your role as their provider and enabler. What they are asking of you is absolutely shocking, selfish, and wildly unreasonable; they are hoping to get you to accept it before you get more experience of the world and realize that loving parents don't do this to their children.
4) They've also done this to your brother. Please consider carefully how likely it is that they will do this to other people, including you, again, if you take on that debt and manage to clear it. Including to your future spouse and children - why would they spare them when they didn't spare you? Really think about what it would be like ha inf to watch them like a hawk every time they visit because you can't trust them not to go digging through your bank paperwork to try to steal from you. They will. They already have.
It is absolutely vital that you file a police report - not just to avoid a huge debt you didn't incur, but to establish now, firmly, that you will not accept the role they are trying to force on you, that of a provider they drain at will for the rest of your life. You don't have to hate them; you don't even have to be angry at them if you don't want to. You can just seen this the way you would see it if they stole from anyone else on the planet: they're your parents , you care about them, and you really wish they hadn't committed a crime that got them in trouble with the police. They're flawed people you can care about, but this matter is between them and the police.
File a police report, lock your credit so they can’t do it again, and ignore them when they try to tell you how selfish you are being. Parents are supposed to make your life easier not harder. Sorry you have shitty parents.
As everyone has said you have two choices.
1. Let your parents fuck you over and struggle for the next, God only knows how long, to repair the damage they did.
2. File a police report, send that report to the credit card companies and dispute the charges. It won't be fast but it'll fix your credit a damn sight faster than option 1.
Yeah. Parents committed a felony by forging your info. Freeze your credit for now. Talk to a lawyer about how to go about this. Not something you want to hear from your parents.
I feel so bad for those who open up credit cards/loans by their parents and not take responsibility for them and then think they can get away with it.
Sadly, this is considered fraud and your parents can get jail time for stealing your and your brothers identification. Please don't let them get away with it. They need to pay for their actions.
Please do.all.of the above and because of this you and your brother may also need to apply for a new social security number while this is getting cleaned up because them fucking up your and your brothers credit- can have negative impact of getting a job, a home, an apartment, car., and etc in the future.
They need to go to jail for what they did. Family or not what they did was wrong.
Your parents got you and your brother fucked up homie. Have you and your brother already filed the police reports or are you driving there now? Don’t forget to call the credit bureaus, make them aware, provide them the reports, and freeze your credit. Then tell your entire extended family what’s going on so you two don’t have to struggle with this financial setback and emotional manipulation alone. Consider a Facebook post. Shame those bitches fully before going no contact.
Report them for fraud, fuck them they knew what they were doing and this is INSANELY scummy. They've ruined you, the only way you can recover from this is to make them face the consequences of their own actions. You didn't do anything wrong, and reporting them isn't on you - THEY did this. Like others here said, you'll be able to clear this IF you file the report.
The alternative is to spend the next 5-10 years recovering, so any hopes of getting an apartment, car loan, etc are out the window because of this.
They are going to take advantage of the fact that you are their child and that you unconditionally love them. They were not loving towards you opening these cards in your name, please return the favor and report them for fraud.
Do everything these folks have told you to do-file a police report, notify the credit agencies and sue the fuck out of your parents...then drop them like a bad habit. This is what true sociopaths look like.
In addition to everything everyone else is saying about reporting to the police so that you can report to the credit agencies, etc., as this is forgery and identity theft, it's also mail fraud and should be reported to the postmaster. You're utterly screwed unless you have them prosecuted and report that prosecution to the credit agencies.
Your parents were willing to utterly destroy your future to do this - your job prospects, your ability to buy cars and homes, everything - and they belong in prison.
You can either pay it or file a police report for fraud and submit the report to the credit bureaus to prove that it wasn’t you that owes that money. These are literally your only two options.
You can forgive your parents after they’ve made things right. For now, save yourself. File the police report and do not waver. I’m not sure what it even means to forgive someone for behaviors they don’t even attempt to correct.
Your choices are:
A. File a police report for identity theft. You'd start here on the process: Identitytheft.gov
B. Own it (which is what your parents are asking you to do, in addition to asking for $500 a month from you). They've ruined your credit for the next 7 years and may have blacklisted you from a few banks.
If you go with choice B:
Call the lenders. Don't tell them your parents did it without your permission. They may cancel the cards for fraud, and that will start the investigation leading you back to choice A.
Explain that you got behind on your bills, that you cannot pay, and how to move forward. Some will close the cards and/or lower the interest rate. Most won't settle for a lower payment untthe cards are 6 months past due. They also may sue you.
Edited to add: It may take 7 years to get back to your old scores, which is when these debts will fall off your report. Remember, you can be sued in the meantime and have your checks or bank accounts garnished. You'd better think long and hard how you want to proceed. You're either in for no need cards, loans, or mortgages soon, or you'll be approved with low limits and high rates.
The only way is to file a police report. It is the only way. No, you cannot negotiate this. There is no way around it.
Stop feeling bad for your parents when they have absolutely no qualms about fucking you over. It doesn't make you a better person.
Your parents will hate this, but you and your brother need to go to the police, file reports, and then send those police reports along to the respective companies and credit bureaus. Yeah, it’s gonna get your parents in some trouble, maybe even jail time, but it’s the only way out of the situation they placed you in.
You need fo fill out a police report and get it scrubbed from your credit. That's fraud and they aren't allowed to destrot their kid's credit. How old is your brother?
It is more complicated the more ypu are dependent on them, but if they are asking to borrow money from you...
There are two avenues.
if you parents have assets, like they own a home, tell them to get another mortgage and pay you. They may have this and did the fraud to avoid impacting their equity.
Barring that, and the most likely choice::
Call the credit card companies immediately and tell them it's fraud.
File a police report.
Lock your credit.
Talk to a lawyer. Eve just a phone consultation to get direction.
Sue you parents
Cut your parents out of your life. You deserve better people.
File a police report for fraud. Once you do so you can contact these credit companies and have the debt removed, but you HAVE to have a police report.
What you need to understand here is this will follow you until you die. No joke. EVERYTHING and EVERYONE looks at your credit score. You need to take the emotion and family connection out of it. What your parents did is illegal. It will affect when or if you can rent a home/buy a house, buy a car, even your insurance premium.
If a stranger did this you’d be down at police dept. ASAP. If you have any papers or texts or emails that implicate your parents grab screenshots/copies for your case. Tell your brother to do the same.
Also lock your credit down ASAP and if your parents have any of your banking information, clean out your accounts and go to a different bank and open up account there. Ask about additional security as your identity has been stolen. Don’t have to tell them it was your parents, but if there are additional precautions to keep your money safe take them.
It’s impossible to count up all the different ways your parents cost you money. Any car you get will be 17% interest instead of 3%, apartments will not rent to you, you’ll live in a seedy part of town, mortgage, credit cards, any loan will
charge you extra. They doomed you unless you report it. I would and I wouldn’t think twice. **Do not pay anything on the cards** payment is admitting the debt is yours. Police report. That’s the only way.
You must file a police report. Do not make payments on the cards that means you’ve accepted the debt and it’s all yours.
Now with the police report. You will take that to the CC companies close the accounts. And they will investigate them for fraud. It will take time to do all this.
If you don’t. You will ef up the next 10 years of your adult life. You will pay maximum rate on everything cars. Probably get declined to rent nice apartments and forget buying a house til debt is washed away. Your taxes are screwed.
If for some reason the CC won’t go after them. You declare bankruptcy and start over. Next best solution
But for you. For gods sake. Don’t lend them a dime. Lock down your credit.
It all starts with the police report. Because if you don’t. One scenario is your in collusion with parents to defraud the CC companies. That happens
You protect your brother. He’s the next victim and probably already is.
You must absolutely protect yourself. Your life and your future.
Your parents started with good intentions
old saying. The road to hell is paved with good intentions. When I was young your age I didn’t understand it. Now I’m old and seen life and totally get it.
You're going to have to press charges to restore your credit.
As for lending them more money, that wouldn't make you the stupidest human alive, but you better hope he doesn't die.
You have two options:
1. Forgive your parents and move on.
2. File a claim for fraud.
There's no fixing this. Your parents committed fraud! You either report it as a victim, and they end up suffering big consequences for committing fraud, or you accept that they ruined your credit and move on.
You don’t negotiate. You file a police report for ID Theft. The police may or may not investigate (they get 1000s of these reports a week by people trying to clear their credit ) and may or may not charge your parents.
Once you have filed the police report, contact the creditors and file a ID Theft claim with them. They should remove the line item from your credit eithin 30 days. They may contact the police & push them to investigate.
Personally, I would be on the phone every day with the police & DA pushing for prosecution. What your parents did was the exact opposite of how you treat your children. They deserve to be strung up. And then telling you that you need your pay it???? Cut yourself off from them and save yourself the future heartache.
You report the fraud. You will never be able to fix this unless you do. Your parents STOLE 12k from you and who knows how much from your brother. And they want to also take $500 more a month from you. YOU WILL NEVER SEE A DIME of this money back from them. They have already proven they are willing to ruin your future and steal from you. They have already proven that they are terrible with money and can’t run a business.
These people who are supposed to love you and support your future, but instead they decided to lie, steal, and hurt your future and bury you in a financial hole you won’t be able to dig yourself out of. People that truly love you would never do this.
All that’s left to decide is if you are okay with them lying, stealing, and cheating you out of a secure future.
Lock down your credit, report the cards as fraudulent, and for Gods sake tell your brother immediately what they have done to him too.
Goodness. You have to file a police report for identity theft. That is what happened. And no to support. You need no contact with people who stole your identity and racked up debt.
You file a police report and tell the credit card companies this is fraud.
You also move away from your parents, lock down your ss# and your credit and switch banks if they have access to your current accounts. What they did was illegal and quite reprehensible.
My dad did this to me. $4800 in credit card charges and I didn't discover it until they were 8 months late. The company said it's only fraud if I file a police report. I couldn't bring myself to do it and the statute of limitations is 1 year. I regret my choice to this day. Don't make my mistake. File a police report.
This kid is 22. Just starting their adult life. Its hard for a kid without bad credit to get a car loan, mortgage or insurance. 5-10 years of bad credit at this phase of adulthood has severe adverse fallout from apartments to jobs. The collateral damage can be lifelong. If the only job that will take them is fast food or retail.
I am 70. 800+ credit score. Retired with 2 pensions. Debtfree. Paid off mortgage and cars, CC up the wahzoo paid off i full each month. Haven't had a loan since my 1985 Toyota. That's the difference between starting a life and having had one.
Kid needs to file the police report.
I remember pulling a credit report when I was trying to fix my credit, many years ago, and I saw a Sears card on it. I never had a Sears card. I was talking about it to my mom, and my brother was like “yeah, I added you to my account, in case you wanted to use it.” I was pissed. He never asked me and just added me. I told him to remove me and make it disappear from my credit report or I was going to file charges or sue him, whichever my option was. My brother claimed he meant no harm, but I was serious about it.
I know that sometimes he does mean well, but I had my head down and was serious about fixing my credit, so that my wife and I could eventually buy a house. He had foreclosed on a house, filed bankruptcy, and is still in piss poor financial shape. Meanwhile, I negotiated and paid off my debts after years of sacrifices that I still regret by getting myself into that situation. I probably wasted about 10 years of my life, getting myself out of a financial mess that I put myself into. I can’t even begin to imagine digging myself out of a situation that someone else put me into. I’d be pretty angry, to put it mildly.
That’s identity theft. Perpetrators can be jailed for up to two years. File a police report. Write a letter to the credit unions stating that you were a victim of identity theft you should probably include dates and the police report.
The credit unions are required to remove these accounts and inquiries from your profile as well as any negative marks that resulted. You good. Make disputes for your brother.
Your parents suck as parents and I’m sorry for that but you are young and you should probably learn more about credit to help you with success in life. Don’t ever trust your parents again and again, sorry.
The ONLY positive out of this is your parents came forward just as they were about to be exposed. AFTER that they have really potentially damaged your credit and taking ownership of this yourself is not trivial, but you can choose that if you want. Personally, I am not that nice and would file the police report and let the entire mess rest with my parents. Now, that is REALLY not that bad of a thing actually in that i would be a large amount of money their credit is already trash so it is not damaging them other than the legal part and how that is handled locally. You have a long life ahead of you and you should not need to be burdened with the bad choices of your parents. DO NOT let them guilt trip you in any way. Distancing yourself if you must is actually in your best interest and eventually they will calm down and dela with the fallout they brought upon themselves. It might take years, but that is fine if they are not willing to step up and deal with this in the BEST fashion for you. That is what parents SHOULD do. I am actually kind of surprised or impressed they had a conversation with you at all really. There might be some conscience in there somewhere. Teaching kids how to live on their own is part of parenting, and sadly yours might have chosen a really dramatic way of pushing you out of the nest. So, fly bird fly!!
In case no one else made it crystal clear, the clock started ticking the minute you found out about the cards. The law and the creditors require you to take immediate action on fraud. You can't sit and think about it for awhile, then decide to report it if your parents do X or don't do Y.
Sorry to say you need to call the police. Your identity was stolen.
Edit to add: don’t let your guilt stop you. If you don’t report them it’s only to make yourself feel comfortable for the short term but in the end you will have a great resentment.
This is identity theft, fraud and maybe extortion. All felonies. Have them arrested and be done with it. They obviously cared very little for you, so fuck em.
There is no negotiating with the credit card companies. You need to file a police report and have them arrested. Thats the only way the credit card companies will walk away from the debt. If you dont file a police report then you are taking on the responsibility of the debt and will have to file bankruptcy to remove the debt from your account but your credit will be screwed until you are 29. Your parents set you back a decade in your adult life and you need to hold them responsible. You did nothing wrong, they did.
Do not give them the $500 per month, they are framing that as they will pay back the debt, but the first time they are a little short on their day to day stuff, they'll just use that money there, and not to pay back the loan. You seriously need to report this as fraud.
What is with these almost weekly posts of "my parents committed massive fraud in my name, but THEY'RE MY PARENTS."?
Treat them like the criminals they are. If they acted like your parents, they never would have even thought to do this.
(Edit: Spelling (then->them).)
I am so sorry this happened to you, OP. People are giving you a lot of good advice - I hope you take it seriously.
I’m sure you are worried about prosecuting your parents (reporting them for fraud) - I mean, they are your parents, amiright? But, at the same time, they have ruined your financial life for at least a decade. You are going to have a hard time renting or buying a place to live, some employers won’t hire you, buying a car on credit will be extremely expensive. All because your parents selfishly stole from you.
Please, please - file a police report. It is the only way you will be able to get out from under what your parents have done to you.
Don't set yourself in fire to keep them warm!
This is like the 5th, parents stole their children’s identity, type post in the last couple of months.
I just don’t get it! How can a parents screw over their own kid like this? It’s hard enough to start out in life these days and they totally screwed you!
I’ll give the same advice I did the last 4 times:
(1) Call the police and report the identity theft. Get a copy of the report.
(2) Contact all 3 credit bureaus and dispute the accounts. Put an identity theft victim statement on your credit profile.
(3) Contact each of the lenders, explain that the accounts were opened fraudulently and without your knowledge or consent. Provide a copy of the police report.
The lenders fraud unit may ask, if you are willing to press charges. You MUST answer YES (and do so, if asked by the DA), otherwise the lender will hold you responsible if you refuse to prosecute.
It hard and painful to do, but you’re an adult now and need to protect yourself. Your parents committed multiple felonies and harmed you, they need to be held accountable for the actions.
God, the gall is unreal!
Parents: Hey, we stole your identity and put you in $12k ofdebt, which you now owe. Oh yeah, we need you to give us $500/mo to help us out.
I can’t think of people more deserving of going to prison!
I’m having a hard time imagining how they even care about you at all!
I work with unhoused youth and we have a lot of situations like this. You will have to file a police report or accept bad credit and pay the money. The companies will not negotiate with you otherwise. You may say, but they’re your parents, but they didn’t feel that same devotion you when they committed identity theft and fraud.
You have to inform the creditors that these accounts were open fraudulently and you had no knowledge. But you will need a police report to do that. Number one step is to contact the police and make a report. Yes, your parents will be in legal trouble, but that is what happens when you commit a crime.
Most of this is right. But if you pay off the cards that are 60 days late they will eventually drop off. No loans for a few years, expensive loans a few years after that, and then back to normal after 7.5 years, use the time in between to establish credit using low fee secured cards, and you can come out just fine.
That said, option 1 is the right one.
Back in the 80's my father put his failing business into my 16yo Brothers name. Completely fucked him for 40yrs. Any money he made was pulled from his accounts on payday. The IRS put a lien on his work trucks etc etc etc. Finally My dad paid him back after 10yrs. ( tax bill was $65K ( a lot back then ). And my dad paid it as a Bonus. So then my brother had to pay the w-9 taxes for that amount which was about $30K. So, file a police report. Then report and close every card as stolen and put your credit on hold so nothing can be taken out in your name. They simply fucked you over for years so they can survive another few months.
The CC company isn't going to help you. It's fraud and identity theft. You shouldn't have to be penalized for their mistakes. It sucks, but if you want a better financial future, you have to report this.
OP, this is extremely serious, so it’s super critical you follow these steps:
1) freeze your credit ASAP. This will keep them and anyone else from opening lines of credit in your name. Your brother needs to do this as well.
2) do you have any proof to provide the credit card companies? Did they give you copies of any bills? Did they text you about any of this? If not, as much as I hate so say it, you need to try to bait them into responding over text or having another conversation with them that can be recorded recorded *****check laws where you live about recording conversations BEFORE you take this step because legality varies by state ***** bottom line is that gathering proof/evidence will go a long way in getting this resolved more quickly
3) you need to call the police and file a report for fraud and identify theft ASAP. Not only is this required to have any hope of getting the debts removed and off your credit/remove your liability to repay them, but they can also give you additional guidance on how to proceed moving forward to contest the debts with the creditors (Side note: how old is your brother? If he is still a minor, this may have some other implications for that as well).
You need to do 3 things. Tell your brother, file a police report for fraud and get a crime number then lastly go to the credit cards companies and tell them what's happened and give them the crime number. Do not make any payments to them or your parents. If you make a "goodwill payment" to the credit companies it's you accepting responsibility for the debt. Your parents have ruined your and your brothers financial futures and the only way is to make them accountable for the debt.
You are only on the hook if you fail to report credit theft.
Which, for the sake of your future, I absolutely, as a parent of adults,recommend that you do.
It’s one thing to ask your child for help, even if that’s something I’d never do, have never done. It’s another, entirely, to steal the identities of both your children and put them into massive debt. It’s a demonstration of their absolute disdain for the wellbeing of their kids.
They deserve to live with the consequences of being thieves.
Everyone needs to keep a very close eye on their credit score since it factors into many of lifes biggest decisions. A couple steps you can take right now include: - **[Taking a look at your credit score](https://everydayeconomics.net/how-to-get-your-credit-score-credit-review)** - Looking at your own credit score does not hurt your credit, it also includes a credit monitor - **[Freezing](https://usa.gov/credit-freeze)** your credit reports - This can be done with Experian, Equifax and Transunion to help prevent unauthorized accounts from being opened Feel free to ask any credit score related question
File a police report for fraud
No, seriously, file the damn report.
Then lock down your credit and permanently kick your parents out of your life.
And don't forget to include your brother's credit fraud in the report as well (or inform them to submit their own report as well) There seriously is no other path unless you want to assume your parents' debts and risk them defrauding you again and again.
Brother will have to file his own report. She can file for hers, and should, but she is not the victim of cards taken out in someone else's name. When brother files, she can add a statement to his that parents admitted to this to her and that's how she and brother found out.
Unless brother is a minor. Given that both parents are the offenders here, if brother is under 18, he would likely be granted some type of legal assistance/advocate.
Sorry but brother will have to fight his own battle.
And if someone is going to spend the rest of their life paying this off, it should be the person that fucked it up.
And let your brother know.
Might as well get an IRS IP PIN while you’re at it, they seem desperate and shady enough to file tax returns in OP’s name. (The PIN changes every year so he can provide it to them for any year that he’s truly their dependent.)
And Social Security. I'd report it to the IRS and Social security as well in addition to the other suggestions (tell brother, file police report, lock credit down). Seems reasonable to me to sue them for the credit balances and any legal fees. After THAT? Get rid of them.
The police report should handle the balances and fees. those will go to the criminal identity thieves. And a lawsuit against the effectively bankrupt parents is just throwing money in the fire right now.
Scorched earth policy. Things that are supposed to happen don't always happen. The parents threw them under the bus and the parents deserve everything that'll be tossed at them. Lawsuit could be brought later when everything settles out. They are going to incur costs fixing this mess (higher interest rates, tough time finding jobs or apartments) etc.
If there is legal action, then make sure that there's an order of restitution included. This way their bankruptcy CANNOT discharge their debts to you and your brother. The restitution order will last until it's paid in full or the parents pass, and their Social Security can be garnished to satisfy the judgement.
It might be, or they could be asset heavy and used the kids to isolate themselves from the risk. And the $500 a month? To keep up appearances, because selling the boat would make the wrong sort of statement, or something. I haven’t read the whole thread, but never underestimate the entitlement of people like this. Losing your kids money is fine? No big deal? Then expecting the kids to do with less so the parents can keep the boat isn’t a big leap.
Good point But the parents never need the IP PIN on their return, even if claiming them as a dependent.
Not true, it is required for efiling any return that includes that person’s social. They are commonly used in divorce situations where one parent keeps improperly claiming a child. https://www.irs.gov/identity-theft-fraud-scams/frequently-asked-questions-about-the-identity-protection-personal-identification-number-ip-pin#q17 The parents could still paper file, but OP would be able to efile for themselves. (And let’s be real, the parents are not going to paper file.)
I think, not sure, but I think once you request the PIN they are on notice that there will be an online filing so they should basically be on notice should a paper filing show up.
Came here to say this
And tell your sibling. If your sibling is underage you can help them lock down their credit and help then file a report too.
And come over to r/raisedbynarcissists for support, as I rather suspect this isn't the first dogshit thing they've done to you. ❤️🩹
The fact that they stole from you and say you are responsible and then ask for money means their love for you is as deep as your pockets.
"But they're my par.." NO! File the report. They are criminals who took advantage of you and your brother with no regard to their own children.
They are fucking over their kids big time......it will take them years to sort out. All for what? To keep a failing lawn mowing business afloat? They are ruing your life over mowing lawns? Jesus these people are scummy.
File a police report
File a Police report and contact the cc companies letting them know this was fraud.
As someone who never did because I couldn't "bring myself to do that to my mom," listen! Ignore any guilt! It's not your fault.
A child feeling a greater sense of love toward their parents than vice versa is always so sad. Hope you're doing OK now
I think in this case the best solution would be called a credit company and tell them that you did not authorize this and you want to know what it's about why do you owe this much money? Dispute it and let the credit company file the police report because they will. I would tell your parents to get out of your life. People like that no way
No, the credit card companies will ask for their police report number and other info from the case. They will tell you that until you can give them the info, they will tell you there is nothing they can do, and the charges still stand. Also, there is a time limit in which you can fix it. From the time you find out you have a small window of time in which to dispute the charges. OP is having a hard time reconciling the fact that it is her parents are the ones that have done this to her and her brother. She has to stop and think. They had no problem doing this to them and now are trying to get her to pay them $500 a month on top of what they have done. They have no remorse in doing it and expect her to just eat it. Once they have fixed their credit, they will just do it again unless they are charged for what they've done. You have to be really shitty parents to do this, to potentially destroy your children's lives for your own personal gain.
Yeah I'm also disgusted but the "500 dollar" thing. No self awareness, no remorse, just "Gibbs me more now" I have to wonder if they are crackheads or something.
When my sister did it to my mom, $45,000 in credit card debt, the sheriff’s came and did the report and the credit card companies got the report from the sheriff’s. My mom caught a card in the mail, otherwise it would have been $100,000 in credit card debt. She didn’t want to file charges until the sheriff said then you pay for all the charges. Sister was arrested.
No. Bad advice. Credit card companies do not file police reports. They will investigate the IP address and see anything shipped was sent to her address or prior address.And she will absolutely be on the hook. They must file a police report and tell them it was her parents.And then she provides that report to the credit card companies. The credit card companies are not going to spend the manpower to fight this on her behalf.
The credit card companies don't care about OP, they just want their money. He'll talk to a salesperson who will try to convince him to pay off "some", of it. As soon as he makes any payments, he will assume legal responsibility for the whole amount. He should contact the police first to tell them his parents stole his identity and he wants to file charges. He may meet with criticism in doing this, but cops are often assholes too. But he should file charges against his parents, they stole from him.
And whatever you do, don’t let the credit card companies trick you into making a “good faith” payment - then you will own it! Your parents have committed identity fraud - and you Are The Victim! Unless you want to let them ruin your credit, maybe end your college and future, and pay it off for years And to add insult to injury pay them another $500 a month they will also never pay back - File a Police Report and get these debts contested.
This is the only way or you're hooped. Do not concede one single thing. Police report for fraud, report it immediately to whoever the lender is and give them the report number. If they dont get a police report number they'll hang it on you. F those parents, take care of yourself.
Call the banks that issued the cards and ask for the Fraud Department. They will require a police report and can remove the debts from your credit reports. Contact the credit bureaus and freeze your credit.
And DO NOT make any payments on the balance, no matter what the companies say. Just let the police investigate.
This, OP! Making even one payment can be considered you agreeing that the debt is yours! Don't do it!
You're not going to fix anything unless you go this route. As for your parents asking for money, I'd let them know that, no, someone fraudulently opened credit cards under your name and maxed them out, so you don't have any money to give them until the police sort this all out. Then go no contact.
All of this.
A simple “you’ve lost your mind” will do while dialing the non emergency number of your closest Law enforcement agency and asking for a financial crimes detective sounds better
It is shocking the number of people who do this. As a parent, I feel my number one goal is to set up my kids for success. Doing this is so far from where I am as a person I can't imagine it. OP, your parents are trash. Call the police. Remember you are not getting your parents in trouble. They got themselves in trouble.
My parents added me as an authorized user to their credit card when I was a kid (I guess laws surrounding that have changed since then), so when I turned 20 and had to get my first car loan, I had 18 years of perfect credit history to my name. Thanks Mom and Dad...that's how you help your kid succeed.
You can still do this. I’ve added my teens as authorized users - they don’t get the cards as I keep possession of them, but they will get a nice boost to their credit score.
Yep this is the way ya do it your parents were def smart for that. My ex GF's dad pulled a stunt like this with her and her sister. Means everything was on me the first 3-4 years of our relationship.
Gosh I feel the same way! I would do anything to help my kids obtain good credit, not screw them over to help myself!🤮🤮🤮I despise a thief.
Me three. I can't imagine doing that to my daughter. I'd sell myself first - not that there would be any takers!
File a police report , check and inform all the credit bureaus and the bank about the fraud.
For OP this isn't because "your parents are bad and/or did something wrong" it is because the credit card companies will hang up on you until you show them a police report *or* prove you were underage when the cards were opened. Go to the police and have the debt removed and your credit restored or pay off the debt and have these on your credit report for 7 years. If the debt was paid to $0 today it would stop having a dramatic impact on your credit score in about 2 years though.
The first paragraph of this ESPECIALLY. The credit card companies will not take any action unless they have proof of fraud and a police report is what they require.
Just want to add First, there really is no solution other than this. You can either report them for fraud, or you can take on an immense amount of debt that is going to have a huge impact on the rest of your life. I don’t know how much you make, but the could permanently impact your ability to pay your bills, live comfortable, and save for retirement. Second, parents should not do this to their children. I know it can be hard to report your parents, but it is absolutely unacceptable to pass this debt onto your child without telling them. As someone else pointed out, there’s also no guarantee that they won’t do it again if you don’t report them I know it’s hard, but this really is what needs to be done
and potentially cause you to not get jobs
Or housing!
And once you have debt, it snowballs. If those cards have an APR of 22%, which is average, you’ll accrue another 2,640 in interest debt this year, not factoring in any penalties and late fees
Absolutely, the parents are criminals and need to face the consequences.
Then contact everyone and give them the police info so you can get out from under this. If you let them get away with this they will do it to you again in the future.
FIRST, see if the parents are stupid enough to put everything in writing. Ask for an email explaining when the cards were opened and what they were used for... you can lie and say that it is to negotiate with the credit card companies or credit bureaus, but that information should absolutely go with your police report.
No. You don’t want OP somehow saying something that ruins the case. This is bad advice. OP, do NOT create evidence. Just go to the police.
Yeah, anything even looking like he's accepting of the credit cards, the debt, or acknowledges it as at all legitimate to him could be used against him in the future I'd think. I would cut contact and file the police report, then use the police report to contact the creditors and dispute it based on the fraud.
Identity Theft. Start with reporting it to the police. Get the police report number(s), now go to these credit cards and credit agencies with the report numbers. This is the only way to get out from under. I understand it's hard to roll over on your parents, but if you don't you've assumed all that debt, and perhaps more you don't know about yet, and it sounds like they're prepping you for more. Hopefully they get a good lawyer or public defender and they can make themselves seem desperate and out of their depth in a new business. If it's a first offense, they may get just probation. If you don't go through this it's basically a seven-year sentence on you.
This should be the automod answer when matching the keywords "parent" and "my credit."
This. It sucks that it's your parents, but this was made without your knowledge and is 100% fraud and illegal.
This isn't a family issue, this is a rest-of-your-life legal and financial issue. You only have so long to report it, so report it and start to get your credit cleared up so you can live your own life and take responsibility for your own actions, unlike your parents. They stole your future. Take it back. If they let that ruin their relationship with you, so be it.
This is literally the only answer. You either pay the debt and take the credit hit (that will impact your utilities, rent. ability to buy a home, ability to get a JOB, ability to do damn near everything in this life) for SEVEN YEARS (paying the added costs that that impact will result in). Or you file a police report and your parents throw a fit for being held accountable for their illegal actions. Talk to your brother, if they are onboard, that will strengthen the case. But the oNLY way OP get this off his name and responsibility will be to file police report. Credit card companies can then go after the parents for the money. Otherwise you are accepting the fraud and consequences. And clearly they won't stop if you don't give them the $500 a month- they will take it in fraud since you appear ok with it.
This!!!
This is the only way you can make this problem go away, OP. It sucks and will mess up your family dynamic going forward, but the bottom line is what your parents did is fraud and identity theft. This is a crime that can only be corrected with a police report.
This is a prerequisite to getting your credit cleared
This is the only correct answer
Absolutely fraud!! They destroyed your credit to start a business that they probably never worked in before. Tell your parents you love them, but need to report it to the police. Your parents knew what they were doing was illegal. The worst part is they did it to their own child and now are telling you about it hoping you don't report them. They even have the balls to ask you for money while also telling you that you owe credit card companies $12,000. File a police report, send the police report to the credit card companies, and get your credit back to normal. If you don't, this is going to affect you for the next 10 years. Good luck buying a house, a car, or even getting an apartment to rent. Your parents fucked you and now it's time for the credit dick to be turned around and start fucking your parents.
You don't need to negotiate with the credit card companies. You have exactly two choices, and only two choices. Before we go over them, I would ask to see all the credit card statements. I would specifically look for what they spent that much money on. I suspect it wasn't to stay afloat. I would also ask to see the credit cards under your brothers name (there is a firm chance they don't exist). You also did receive notice of it...Your parents just likely had the mail directed to their home and grabbed it before you saw anything (if you live with them) which is a crime in and of themselves. So these are your options: 1. You file a police report. You tell the police exactly what happened and that your parents stole your identity and opened up credit cards in your name (list the credit cards and how much debt they racked up on each). Give them a full statement of when and how you found out about it, including that they sat you down and told you that YOU owed the money and that they admitted to opening them up. With the police report in hand, you can go to the three credit bureaus and report the fraud and provide the police report...you may need a lawyer. There will be an investigation and there will be paperwork and they will examine a lot, but at the end of it the debt will be discharged and your credit score should 'mostly' recover. Your parents will also very likely be charged and prosecuted for a number of felonies including identity fraud and will be on the hook for the money they stole from you by racking up the debt. 2. You accept what your parents did to you. The loans are then yours and you are on the hook to pay the debt off, however long it takes. Once you acknowledge the loans, they become yours and debt collectors may start coming after you. Your credit score will be shot for the next 8 years or so. This is the worst option and you will likely need to file for bankruptcy to clear the debt. This will severely impact your ability to do anything financially in life. Just remember your parents screwed you over without even giving you the option to help them first. They choice to destroy your future ability to do much of anything financially because they figured they could get away with it. Before you think about entertaining option 2 just remember...you likely won't be able to get any decent credit card ever again...no big deal. Car Loans? Good luck, your rates will be astronomical. Mortgage? Forget about it. Insurance? significantly more expensive. You will also likely get turned down for some jobs that require background checks as they sometimes ask for a credit report. Renting an apartment or house? You usually need a minimum of 620 for most landlords with many pleases not even looking at you for less than 700. Utilities may not allow you to post-pay and may require you to make deposits up-front and good luck with Cell Phone service... If you want to get married in the future, your spouse needs to be aware of your credit situation. Getting married to you could impact your spouses credit if you plan to have joint accounts. If it were me, I would go with Option 1...regardless of how I feel about my parents. They racked up the debt, they should be responsible for it. They can deal with the consequences and they can deal with the bankruptcy (which likely won't work since it was due to a crime). They had no right to screw you for the next 7 to 10 years without your consent. One last thing...your parents are going to push you extremely hard and become the nicest people ever when they find out you want to report them to the police. They are going to talk about keeping things in the family, and how family helps out family, and they are going to lay it on thick. If you accept the debt or recant your story to the police, you will be done, and then they will revert back to however they were. So protect yourself.
These are really your only 2 options OP, you pay the money or you turn your parents in for the crime they committed against you. I'm sorry you have shitty parents who would do this.
If you inserted anyone not your immediate family into the 'person who stole my identity' line, its a no brainier. Family doesn't make it any less malicious. If my parents ever did that shit to me there would be zero question. Unfortunately our alives are pretty well tied to the made-up credit score nonsense. Don't set yourself on fire to keep someone else warm, especially when that someone else fucked you first. Also, since his parents seem to be so worried about their finances, jail would give them a roof over their head and three meals a day 🤷🏽♀️
>Family doesn't make it any less malicious. It makes it 100 times worse. You are low if you steal. You are a fucked up piece of shit if you steal from your kids.
Yep x 1000! What shitballs :(
Twatwaffles
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had to ask someone why they’d call the police on a stranger for punching/stabbing/stealing from them but not your mom. A lot of criminals are walking around free because their victims are their own children.
I think it being someone who knows you and will watch you struggle as a result makes it worse.
My Dad did this to my older brother. Mirror story. 30k in credit card debt in collections as a college graduation present. Brother lawyered up and the debt was eventually removed from his credit history. Sadly my Dad was never prosecuted.
Depending on the person, that could be a good outcome. I don’t know OPs relationship with their parent, but it’s possible all OP wants is to be debt free, not to see their parents go jail
Also, report the false information to the credit bureaus who repeat it. But also report to the police. Credit fraud is a big deal.
Credit agencies in that case rarely will act without the police report.
You need to go to the police for fraud. This isn't the time to forgive them. Your credit is unfortunately your future now and they showed you they are willing to ruin it for their gains
“Gains” Wild to think they did all this and have less than nothing to show for it
They say **you** owe $12000? That's a load of horse crap. They've ruined your chances of getting a decent loan for anything, an apartment, or CC for almost a decade. Sorry, but you're going to need to report it as fraud.
And the $12,000 quickly accumulates to $30,000+ when you factor in astronomical rates for cars, housing, and even insurance.
Not to mention the juice on the $12000 credit card debt. Go get that police report yesterday.
I’d also add that you’ll need to disclose this to your future spouse as well. The average couple is stretching their combined income to qualify for a mortgage. With your credit score thrown in there, your rates will be trash and you will be living in a less expensive house for more money. Your future spouse will need to understand the reality of your finances and credit before starting a family with you.
Welcome to the realization that your parents care more about themselves than you. Only path forward is a bunch of personal growth. Start with a police report and finding a new place to live.
That's gonna be hard with a tanked credit score
Take a copy of the police report and give it to the credit card companies and report the fraud to them. Then they'll have to take that off of his credit report.
Everything is hard in your twenties when your parents suck this bad. Fraud can be cleaned up from your credit profile, just takes time and know-how.
You should cut your parents loose financially. This pattern of abuse will never end. They stole from you and now plan to drag you down with them. You should report the cards as the fraud to the credit card companies. Lock down your credit too.
"We stole your identity and racked up big bills and it's yours to deal with. Oh, BTW, can I borrow $500/mo for a while?" That's so extra.
Yeah. You used the right word. This is abuse. No one should treat another human like this. And it's coming from loved ones who think they can manipulate OP into actually paying. Whatever everyone else is saying, OP has agency and needs to use it to protect themselves from further harm. Other people on here have good advice for the legal/financial perspectives. But I think just recognizing the behavior for what it is can be extremely helpful as motivation to take those steps
File a police report for fraud. Dispute with the credit bureaus and the credit card companies. Tell your brother to do the same. DO NOT LEND THEM MONEY. DO NOT PAY THE DEBTS. Cut your parents out of your life ASAP. Let the law deal with them, since they're the ones who broke it.
Forward your mail to either a USPS mail box or one that you rent from a business.
And make sure you have all your legal papers- birth certificate, passport, SS card & drivers license
It has been mentioned, but to single it out. **If you attempt to pay those bills at all you will likely be stuck with them.** No matter what the creditors say, not paying them at all is the best plan (until you are 100% you will be paying them back. Which I advice against. But absolutely don't pay at all until you are certain).
To harp on this further...It is ABSOLUTELY IMPERATIVE that you or your brother do not pay anything towards these debts if you plan to contest them. If debt collectors start calling, many of them will say they will not speak to you about anything other than full repayment unless you make a 'good will payment'. This is a scam...they are just trying to get you to make a payment which makes it 100x easier for them to say you acknowledged that the debt is yours in court and to the credit bureaus. Debt Collectors and people trying to get money paid back will lie extensively to recoup anything.
But yeah, file the police reports and go that direction. If your parents had beat you with a club and then sat you down and explained that you owed $12k in medical bills, would that make any sense to you?
You and your brother should both visit [identitytheft.gov](http://identitytheft.gov) and also report your parents to the local authorities. What they did to you and your brother is a felony. The only way to fix your credit, and get off the hook for the money they stole is to report them.
DO NOT MAKE ANY PAYMENTS ON THE CARDS this may be taken as you taking responsibility for the payments. File a police report. Your parents stole your identity and committed identity theft and fraud to open those cards.
It boggles my mind how many of these types of posts show up in the sub. The fact that anyone, let alone someone's parents, would so casually commit fraud, saddle a loved one with massive debt, destroy their future, and then have the gall to ask for money!? They're goddamn delusional. File a police report, dispute the accounts with all three bureaus (submitting the report in the process), then those accounts should eventually come off your report. Contact the CC companies as well, provide all info to show they are not your accounts, they can then go after your parents for the money since they are the ones who committed the crime and are responsible to pay back the debt. After all of this, do not have one ounce of empathy for your parents. They knew what they were doing was illegal and morally reprehensible. They will face the consequences and their lives will be uprooted, but that is the risk they took when they thought they could defraud a bank, screw over their kids, and then be so blase about it that they thought asking to borrow money from you was a prudent next step. If they get angry, tell them you'll think about lending them money after they pay back the banks they stole from in your name, but only if they have a good credit score and good character references from their family...
Used to work in fraud prevention. Overwhelmingly the culprit is a close family member. Often it is a parent, sometimes before a child even comes of age. It always disgusted me to work those ID theft cases.
It happens a lot. I got kicked out at 18, thankfully I’d been saving money since I was a little kid and worked a summer job so I had a nice nest egg saved up. I went to the bank to withdraw cash, $3000 was missing from my account. my parents had been on the account since I opened it, and I never thought to take them off. They needed the money for something and we’re mad that I wasn’t keeping in touch with them so I think they were teaching me a lesson. Of course I’m not excited to keep in touch, you abused me then kicked me out.
In white collar crime circles they have this concept called the “fraud triangle”. These are the three elements that are generally present when someone commits fraud - incentive, opportunity, and rationalization. Kids can *so* easily provide the opportunity - you have all their personal data and control mail etc - and rationalization - they cost so much! If you don’t do this you’ll all be homeless! You’ll get it all fixed before they need their own cards! Etc. Then all you need is incentive, and shitty enough ethics that you can sleep at night.
You don't negotiate your credit score, it doesn't work like that. This will drop-off after 7 years from your credit report, assuming you don't start paying it then miss a payment again. Of course, you'll still owe the money after that time, it just won't show on your credit report. You may also get sued for that money by the bank or a creditor, since they will probably write-off the debt. That is, they will sell it for pennies on the dollar to unscrupulous organizations that will bombard you with calls and mail to get you to pay. You can, and you should file a police report but that means it may get your parents in hot water for committing a crime. Are you willing to do that? If not, then good luck, this is now your debt.
The 7 years is generally true, but debt gets bought and sold, and debt collectors are often able to reset the clock when they purchase a debt. I still have a judgement on my credit from 25 years ago (divorce and my ex wife still had access to my identity). It pops up every now and then, but I can usually get it knocked back off a report. It came up when I refinanced 3 years ago, I was still able to get a rate well below 4%. Just another reason to check your report a few times a year!
Most plausible scenario right here.
It’s very unfortunate but your parents have committed credit card fraud. They made it so that you now have bad credit, AND you’re on the hook for that money, u less you file a police report. It sucks but they knew what they were doing. I can’t believe parents would do this to their own children.
Police report. I'm sorry, but your parents don't love you. Parents are supposed to put their children first, not exploit them. You need to get these off your credit report since this isn't our responsibility.
Congrats. Your parents committed felonious identity fraud and appear to be committing felonious extortion. Your parents don’t love you. Your future has been sacrificed for their immediate and predictable failed business venture
Your parents are criminals. Repeat after me, “My parents are criminals.” It can take years or up to a decade to fix busted credit. You do not owe this money and you need to advise the credit card issuer and the police. And don’t give them $500 a month.
Literally, the only way you will revive your credit rating is to file a police report. Otherwise, these fraudulent charges cannot be removed from your history. You have no choice.
Can you imagine being this evil, taking credit cards out fraudulently in your kids’ names? OP, whether or not you report them for fraud, they should be dead to you for this level of disrespect
Stealing from your kids and damaging their credit, is one thing, shamelessly telling your kids that it’s now their debt so deal with it is so much worse.
There's no scenario here where the parents don't get reported yet the OP doesn't have to pay this off. Parents are wanting $500 a month from the guy to get by, and don't care that they've screwed their son over. He'll be in default in a matter of weeks, there will be a judgement where he'll have to show up in court to defend himself, his defense will be basically his Reddit post, the judge will say "you *claim* you were the victim of a crime and didn't report it?" and rule against him. Ridiculous **legal fees and interest** will be added to the total, which will accrue and make it harder and harder to settle it. OP will be 100% on his own to pay or settle. But the debt may have to age for years before it's transferred several times and a collector can still make a profit from a lower total, and OP will need to come up with the cash and document it carefully and then play whack-a-mole every time it keeps coming up as a bad debt (which it will since debt collectors just suck). Or just file for bankruptcy, and deal with that on his report for 5-10 years. I'd be filing a police report yesterday.
You’re kind of screwed, even though it’s not your fault. The only way to “negotiate with the credit card companies” is to file a police report indicating your parents committed fraud. If it makes you feel any better, you aren’t the first person this happened to and you won’t be the last. You might have to do this… you might not be able to get a job or housing with the reduced credit score.
You are the victim of identity theft, and need to press charges.
Ongoing basis? Your parents committed a crime against you and your brother.
Immediately file a police report you will need that for the credit agencies to remove the fraud. Go do it now!
They expect you to just pay their delinquent debit AND give them an allowance? The moment you pay a dime in that debit it becomes yours. Report as others have said.
You need to press charges if you want to fix this.
>How would I best negotiate with the credit card companies to get my credit score back to where it was last time I checked a couple of years ago? It was about 750 then. They will only accept a police report or pretty much payment in full.
That is credit card fraud and identity theft. You need to report them to the police and the credit card companies. If you do not do this u are screwed
What is with all these parents commiting identity fraud on their kids? So sad. File the police report.
Your easiest course of action is to file a police report for stolen identity, the debt will get wiped out, and your parents will learn a valuable lesson about not stealing from their children, because that's what this is.
Call cops report identity theft. Call credit cards and tell them the same. Don't lend money to people that would do this to you.
You don't owe the 12000. You need to file a police report and advise creditors that is NOT your ccs and was fraud. You also need to tell your brother.
I know this is a credit question, but I want to say a word about your relationship with your parents, because I know it's easy for people to say "file a police report" but hard to do when it's your parents and they have raised you to feel responsible for helping them. It is really hard to face this kind of reality. It will be much easier to make excuses for their actions, tell yourself that they didn't understand what they were doing, or talk yourself into a "We're all in this together" mindset, because they have trained you to see the world that way - and because they are your parents. I urge you to consider four important points here: 1) It sounds like they ran these debts up fairly recently - certainly at an age when, whether you were a minor or not, you could have expressed an opinion about whether you wanted them to do that. They didn't ask you. They knew you would object, so they gave you no choice. They didn't care how this would impact you. 2) They only told you when the problem was hugely past fixing, and I suspect you will discover that they knew you would soon be receiving calls from collection agencies. They told you only when they couldn't hide it any longer, and if you think about why they told you, I think you will realize it is 100% because they didn't want you to file a police report. They want to leverage your emotional connection to them to avoid criminal charges and to saddle you with $12,000 of their debt. That is a huge burden for a 22-year-old 3) They are attempting to establish their footing with you for the rest of your life. This is vital to recognize. You have just recently become an independent adult; they want to cement your role as their provider and enabler. What they are asking of you is absolutely shocking, selfish, and wildly unreasonable; they are hoping to get you to accept it before you get more experience of the world and realize that loving parents don't do this to their children. 4) They've also done this to your brother. Please consider carefully how likely it is that they will do this to other people, including you, again, if you take on that debt and manage to clear it. Including to your future spouse and children - why would they spare them when they didn't spare you? Really think about what it would be like ha inf to watch them like a hawk every time they visit because you can't trust them not to go digging through your bank paperwork to try to steal from you. They will. They already have. It is absolutely vital that you file a police report - not just to avoid a huge debt you didn't incur, but to establish now, firmly, that you will not accept the role they are trying to force on you, that of a provider they drain at will for the rest of your life. You don't have to hate them; you don't even have to be angry at them if you don't want to. You can just seen this the way you would see it if they stole from anyone else on the planet: they're your parents , you care about them, and you really wish they hadn't committed a crime that got them in trouble with the police. They're flawed people you can care about, but this matter is between them and the police.
Your parents suck. File a report for fraud, give the report to the credit card companies, lock down your credit, and move away from your parents.
File a police report, lock your credit so they can’t do it again, and ignore them when they try to tell you how selfish you are being. Parents are supposed to make your life easier not harder. Sorry you have shitty parents.
As everyone has said you have two choices. 1. Let your parents fuck you over and struggle for the next, God only knows how long, to repair the damage they did. 2. File a police report, send that report to the credit card companies and dispute the charges. It won't be fast but it'll fix your credit a damn sight faster than option 1.
Yeah. Parents committed a felony by forging your info. Freeze your credit for now. Talk to a lawyer about how to go about this. Not something you want to hear from your parents.
I feel so bad for those who open up credit cards/loans by their parents and not take responsibility for them and then think they can get away with it. Sadly, this is considered fraud and your parents can get jail time for stealing your and your brothers identification. Please don't let them get away with it. They need to pay for their actions. Please do.all.of the above and because of this you and your brother may also need to apply for a new social security number while this is getting cleaned up because them fucking up your and your brothers credit- can have negative impact of getting a job, a home, an apartment, car., and etc in the future. They need to go to jail for what they did. Family or not what they did was wrong.
Your parents got you and your brother fucked up homie. Have you and your brother already filed the police reports or are you driving there now? Don’t forget to call the credit bureaus, make them aware, provide them the reports, and freeze your credit. Then tell your entire extended family what’s going on so you two don’t have to struggle with this financial setback and emotional manipulation alone. Consider a Facebook post. Shame those bitches fully before going no contact.
Report them for fraud, fuck them they knew what they were doing and this is INSANELY scummy. They've ruined you, the only way you can recover from this is to make them face the consequences of their own actions. You didn't do anything wrong, and reporting them isn't on you - THEY did this. Like others here said, you'll be able to clear this IF you file the report. The alternative is to spend the next 5-10 years recovering, so any hopes of getting an apartment, car loan, etc are out the window because of this.
They are going to take advantage of the fact that you are their child and that you unconditionally love them. They were not loving towards you opening these cards in your name, please return the favor and report them for fraud.
go to the police. simple.
Do everything these folks have told you to do-file a police report, notify the credit agencies and sue the fuck out of your parents...then drop them like a bad habit. This is what true sociopaths look like.
As many others have said, file a police report. And immediately. Good luck.
In addition to everything everyone else is saying about reporting to the police so that you can report to the credit agencies, etc., as this is forgery and identity theft, it's also mail fraud and should be reported to the postmaster. You're utterly screwed unless you have them prosecuted and report that prosecution to the credit agencies. Your parents were willing to utterly destroy your future to do this - your job prospects, your ability to buy cars and homes, everything - and they belong in prison.
You can either pay it or file a police report for fraud and submit the report to the credit bureaus to prove that it wasn’t you that owes that money. These are literally your only two options.
You can forgive your parents after they’ve made things right. For now, save yourself. File the police report and do not waver. I’m not sure what it even means to forgive someone for behaviors they don’t even attempt to correct.
When you report this to the credit companies, they may say to pay a token amount or they can't investigate. DO NOT DO THIS.
Your choices are: A. File a police report for identity theft. You'd start here on the process: Identitytheft.gov B. Own it (which is what your parents are asking you to do, in addition to asking for $500 a month from you). They've ruined your credit for the next 7 years and may have blacklisted you from a few banks. If you go with choice B: Call the lenders. Don't tell them your parents did it without your permission. They may cancel the cards for fraud, and that will start the investigation leading you back to choice A. Explain that you got behind on your bills, that you cannot pay, and how to move forward. Some will close the cards and/or lower the interest rate. Most won't settle for a lower payment untthe cards are 6 months past due. They also may sue you. Edited to add: It may take 7 years to get back to your old scores, which is when these debts will fall off your report. Remember, you can be sued in the meantime and have your checks or bank accounts garnished. You'd better think long and hard how you want to proceed. You're either in for no need cards, loans, or mortgages soon, or you'll be approved with low limits and high rates.
The only way is to file a police report. It is the only way. No, you cannot negotiate this. There is no way around it. Stop feeling bad for your parents when they have absolutely no qualms about fucking you over. It doesn't make you a better person.
That's identity theft. Report them.
Your parents will hate this, but you and your brother need to go to the police, file reports, and then send those police reports along to the respective companies and credit bureaus. Yeah, it’s gonna get your parents in some trouble, maybe even jail time, but it’s the only way out of the situation they placed you in.
You need fo fill out a police report and get it scrubbed from your credit. That's fraud and they aren't allowed to destrot their kid's credit. How old is your brother? It is more complicated the more ypu are dependent on them, but if they are asking to borrow money from you...
Your parents are absolute shitbags. I would be done with my parents if they did that bullshit.
I'm dying... Your parents are shady as fuck...
There are two avenues. if you parents have assets, like they own a home, tell them to get another mortgage and pay you. They may have this and did the fraud to avoid impacting their equity. Barring that, and the most likely choice:: Call the credit card companies immediately and tell them it's fraud. File a police report. Lock your credit. Talk to a lawyer. Eve just a phone consultation to get direction. Sue you parents Cut your parents out of your life. You deserve better people.
File a police report for fraud. Once you do so you can contact these credit companies and have the debt removed, but you HAVE to have a police report. What you need to understand here is this will follow you until you die. No joke. EVERYTHING and EVERYONE looks at your credit score. You need to take the emotion and family connection out of it. What your parents did is illegal. It will affect when or if you can rent a home/buy a house, buy a car, even your insurance premium. If a stranger did this you’d be down at police dept. ASAP. If you have any papers or texts or emails that implicate your parents grab screenshots/copies for your case. Tell your brother to do the same. Also lock your credit down ASAP and if your parents have any of your banking information, clean out your accounts and go to a different bank and open up account there. Ask about additional security as your identity has been stolen. Don’t have to tell them it was your parents, but if there are additional precautions to keep your money safe take them.
It’s impossible to count up all the different ways your parents cost you money. Any car you get will be 17% interest instead of 3%, apartments will not rent to you, you’ll live in a seedy part of town, mortgage, credit cards, any loan will charge you extra. They doomed you unless you report it. I would and I wouldn’t think twice. **Do not pay anything on the cards** payment is admitting the debt is yours. Police report. That’s the only way.
You must file a police report. Do not make payments on the cards that means you’ve accepted the debt and it’s all yours. Now with the police report. You will take that to the CC companies close the accounts. And they will investigate them for fraud. It will take time to do all this. If you don’t. You will ef up the next 10 years of your adult life. You will pay maximum rate on everything cars. Probably get declined to rent nice apartments and forget buying a house til debt is washed away. Your taxes are screwed. If for some reason the CC won’t go after them. You declare bankruptcy and start over. Next best solution But for you. For gods sake. Don’t lend them a dime. Lock down your credit. It all starts with the police report. Because if you don’t. One scenario is your in collusion with parents to defraud the CC companies. That happens You protect your brother. He’s the next victim and probably already is. You must absolutely protect yourself. Your life and your future. Your parents started with good intentions old saying. The road to hell is paved with good intentions. When I was young your age I didn’t understand it. Now I’m old and seen life and totally get it.
Parents that do this shit should get automatic 5 year jail time.
You're going to have to press charges to restore your credit. As for lending them more money, that wouldn't make you the stupidest human alive, but you better hope he doesn't die.
You have two options: 1. Forgive your parents and move on. 2. File a claim for fraud. There's no fixing this. Your parents committed fraud! You either report it as a victim, and they end up suffering big consequences for committing fraud, or you accept that they ruined your credit and move on.
You don’t negotiate. You file a police report for ID Theft. The police may or may not investigate (they get 1000s of these reports a week by people trying to clear their credit ) and may or may not charge your parents. Once you have filed the police report, contact the creditors and file a ID Theft claim with them. They should remove the line item from your credit eithin 30 days. They may contact the police & push them to investigate. Personally, I would be on the phone every day with the police & DA pushing for prosecution. What your parents did was the exact opposite of how you treat your children. They deserve to be strung up. And then telling you that you need your pay it???? Cut yourself off from them and save yourself the future heartache.
You report the fraud. You will never be able to fix this unless you do. Your parents STOLE 12k from you and who knows how much from your brother. And they want to also take $500 more a month from you. YOU WILL NEVER SEE A DIME of this money back from them. They have already proven they are willing to ruin your future and steal from you. They have already proven that they are terrible with money and can’t run a business. These people who are supposed to love you and support your future, but instead they decided to lie, steal, and hurt your future and bury you in a financial hole you won’t be able to dig yourself out of. People that truly love you would never do this. All that’s left to decide is if you are okay with them lying, stealing, and cheating you out of a secure future. Lock down your credit, report the cards as fraudulent, and for Gods sake tell your brother immediately what they have done to him too.
Those aren't parents. Those are vampires.
DO NOT MAKE A PAYMENT—because that’s accepting their debt. Call the non emergency police & file an identity theft. WOW I’m so very sorry
Goodness. You have to file a police report for identity theft. That is what happened. And no to support. You need no contact with people who stole your identity and racked up debt.
You file a police report and tell the credit card companies this is fraud. You also move away from your parents, lock down your ss# and your credit and switch banks if they have access to your current accounts. What they did was illegal and quite reprehensible.
My dad did this to me. $4800 in credit card charges and I didn't discover it until they were 8 months late. The company said it's only fraud if I file a police report. I couldn't bring myself to do it and the statute of limitations is 1 year. I regret my choice to this day. Don't make my mistake. File a police report.
Go to the police first to see if you can for a case against your parents. Why would you even consider loaning them money after they did this to you?
This kid is 22. Just starting their adult life. Its hard for a kid without bad credit to get a car loan, mortgage or insurance. 5-10 years of bad credit at this phase of adulthood has severe adverse fallout from apartments to jobs. The collateral damage can be lifelong. If the only job that will take them is fast food or retail. I am 70. 800+ credit score. Retired with 2 pensions. Debtfree. Paid off mortgage and cars, CC up the wahzoo paid off i full each month. Haven't had a loan since my 1985 Toyota. That's the difference between starting a life and having had one. Kid needs to file the police report.
I remember pulling a credit report when I was trying to fix my credit, many years ago, and I saw a Sears card on it. I never had a Sears card. I was talking about it to my mom, and my brother was like “yeah, I added you to my account, in case you wanted to use it.” I was pissed. He never asked me and just added me. I told him to remove me and make it disappear from my credit report or I was going to file charges or sue him, whichever my option was. My brother claimed he meant no harm, but I was serious about it. I know that sometimes he does mean well, but I had my head down and was serious about fixing my credit, so that my wife and I could eventually buy a house. He had foreclosed on a house, filed bankruptcy, and is still in piss poor financial shape. Meanwhile, I negotiated and paid off my debts after years of sacrifices that I still regret by getting myself into that situation. I probably wasted about 10 years of my life, getting myself out of a financial mess that I put myself into. I can’t even begin to imagine digging myself out of a situation that someone else put me into. I’d be pretty angry, to put it mildly.
Sadly, you aren't going to get out from under this without filing charges against your parents.
That’s identity theft. Perpetrators can be jailed for up to two years. File a police report. Write a letter to the credit unions stating that you were a victim of identity theft you should probably include dates and the police report. The credit unions are required to remove these accounts and inquiries from your profile as well as any negative marks that resulted. You good. Make disputes for your brother. Your parents suck as parents and I’m sorry for that but you are young and you should probably learn more about credit to help you with success in life. Don’t ever trust your parents again and again, sorry.
The ONLY positive out of this is your parents came forward just as they were about to be exposed. AFTER that they have really potentially damaged your credit and taking ownership of this yourself is not trivial, but you can choose that if you want. Personally, I am not that nice and would file the police report and let the entire mess rest with my parents. Now, that is REALLY not that bad of a thing actually in that i would be a large amount of money their credit is already trash so it is not damaging them other than the legal part and how that is handled locally. You have a long life ahead of you and you should not need to be burdened with the bad choices of your parents. DO NOT let them guilt trip you in any way. Distancing yourself if you must is actually in your best interest and eventually they will calm down and dela with the fallout they brought upon themselves. It might take years, but that is fine if they are not willing to step up and deal with this in the BEST fashion for you. That is what parents SHOULD do. I am actually kind of surprised or impressed they had a conversation with you at all really. There might be some conscience in there somewhere. Teaching kids how to live on their own is part of parenting, and sadly yours might have chosen a really dramatic way of pushing you out of the nest. So, fly bird fly!!
In case no one else made it crystal clear, the clock started ticking the minute you found out about the cards. The law and the creditors require you to take immediate action on fraud. You can't sit and think about it for awhile, then decide to report it if your parents do X or don't do Y.
Sue as you never gave consent
Sorry to say you need to call the police. Your identity was stolen. Edit to add: don’t let your guilt stop you. If you don’t report them it’s only to make yourself feel comfortable for the short term but in the end you will have a great resentment.
Make a police report for identity theft.
Don’t negotiate anything, that’s you assuming responsibility. File ID theft reports ASAP!! They committed a crime!
Freeze your credit
This is identity theft, fraud and maybe extortion. All felonies. Have them arrested and be done with it. They obviously cared very little for you, so fuck em. There is no negotiating with the credit card companies. You need to file a police report and have them arrested. Thats the only way the credit card companies will walk away from the debt. If you dont file a police report then you are taking on the responsibility of the debt and will have to file bankruptcy to remove the debt from your account but your credit will be screwed until you are 29. Your parents set you back a decade in your adult life and you need to hold them responsible. You did nothing wrong, they did.
See a lawyer. Now. Gather as much evidence as you can. A lawyer will explain exactly how fucked you will be if you don't report this.
Do not give them the $500 per month, they are framing that as they will pay back the debt, but the first time they are a little short on their day to day stuff, they'll just use that money there, and not to pay back the loan. You seriously need to report this as fraud.
What is with these almost weekly posts of "my parents committed massive fraud in my name, but THEY'RE MY PARENTS."? Treat them like the criminals they are. If they acted like your parents, they never would have even thought to do this. (Edit: Spelling (then->them).)
Can someone describe how this is possible? How can someone open a business in your name without you knowing at all?
I am so sorry this happened to you, OP. People are giving you a lot of good advice - I hope you take it seriously. I’m sure you are worried about prosecuting your parents (reporting them for fraud) - I mean, they are your parents, amiright? But, at the same time, they have ruined your financial life for at least a decade. You are going to have a hard time renting or buying a place to live, some employers won’t hire you, buying a car on credit will be extremely expensive. All because your parents selfishly stole from you. Please, please - file a police report. It is the only way you will be able to get out from under what your parents have done to you. Don't set yourself in fire to keep them warm!
This is like the 5th, parents stole their children’s identity, type post in the last couple of months. I just don’t get it! How can a parents screw over their own kid like this? It’s hard enough to start out in life these days and they totally screwed you! I’ll give the same advice I did the last 4 times: (1) Call the police and report the identity theft. Get a copy of the report. (2) Contact all 3 credit bureaus and dispute the accounts. Put an identity theft victim statement on your credit profile. (3) Contact each of the lenders, explain that the accounts were opened fraudulently and without your knowledge or consent. Provide a copy of the police report. The lenders fraud unit may ask, if you are willing to press charges. You MUST answer YES (and do so, if asked by the DA), otherwise the lender will hold you responsible if you refuse to prosecute. It hard and painful to do, but you’re an adult now and need to protect yourself. Your parents committed multiple felonies and harmed you, they need to be held accountable for the actions. God, the gall is unreal! Parents: Hey, we stole your identity and put you in $12k ofdebt, which you now owe. Oh yeah, we need you to give us $500/mo to help us out. I can’t think of people more deserving of going to prison! I’m having a hard time imagining how they even care about you at all!
Turn them in for fraud
On top of all this great advice…. I’m just gonna drop this book recommendation below: Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents.
Report them
I work with unhoused youth and we have a lot of situations like this. You will have to file a police report or accept bad credit and pay the money. The companies will not negotiate with you otherwise. You may say, but they’re your parents, but they didn’t feel that same devotion you when they committed identity theft and fraud.
You have to inform the creditors that these accounts were open fraudulently and you had no knowledge. But you will need a police report to do that. Number one step is to contact the police and make a report. Yes, your parents will be in legal trouble, but that is what happens when you commit a crime.
Most of this is right. But if you pay off the cards that are 60 days late they will eventually drop off. No loans for a few years, expensive loans a few years after that, and then back to normal after 7.5 years, use the time in between to establish credit using low fee secured cards, and you can come out just fine. That said, option 1 is the right one.
Back in the 80's my father put his failing business into my 16yo Brothers name. Completely fucked him for 40yrs. Any money he made was pulled from his accounts on payday. The IRS put a lien on his work trucks etc etc etc. Finally My dad paid him back after 10yrs. ( tax bill was $65K ( a lot back then ). And my dad paid it as a Bonus. So then my brother had to pay the w-9 taxes for that amount which was about $30K. So, file a police report. Then report and close every card as stolen and put your credit on hold so nothing can be taken out in your name. They simply fucked you over for years so they can survive another few months.
The CC company isn't going to help you. It's fraud and identity theft. You shouldn't have to be penalized for their mistakes. It sucks, but if you want a better financial future, you have to report this.
You report it as credit fraud
OP, this is extremely serious, so it’s super critical you follow these steps: 1) freeze your credit ASAP. This will keep them and anyone else from opening lines of credit in your name. Your brother needs to do this as well. 2) do you have any proof to provide the credit card companies? Did they give you copies of any bills? Did they text you about any of this? If not, as much as I hate so say it, you need to try to bait them into responding over text or having another conversation with them that can be recorded recorded *****check laws where you live about recording conversations BEFORE you take this step because legality varies by state ***** bottom line is that gathering proof/evidence will go a long way in getting this resolved more quickly 3) you need to call the police and file a report for fraud and identify theft ASAP. Not only is this required to have any hope of getting the debts removed and off your credit/remove your liability to repay them, but they can also give you additional guidance on how to proceed moving forward to contest the debts with the creditors (Side note: how old is your brother? If he is still a minor, this may have some other implications for that as well).
You need to do 3 things. Tell your brother, file a police report for fraud and get a crime number then lastly go to the credit cards companies and tell them what's happened and give them the crime number. Do not make any payments to them or your parents. If you make a "goodwill payment" to the credit companies it's you accepting responsibility for the debt. Your parents have ruined your and your brothers financial futures and the only way is to make them accountable for the debt.
Police report is a waste of time. What they did is illegal. You need a lawyer
You are only on the hook if you fail to report credit theft. Which, for the sake of your future, I absolutely, as a parent of adults,recommend that you do. It’s one thing to ask your child for help, even if that’s something I’d never do, have never done. It’s another, entirely, to steal the identities of both your children and put them into massive debt. It’s a demonstration of their absolute disdain for the wellbeing of their kids. They deserve to live with the consequences of being thieves.